Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Staple Stamping Stapler

A stapler that uses straight wire.
  (+7, -1)
(+7, -1)
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The workday was progressing slowly as usual from inside employee number 785673's cubicle. Just as he decided to readjust the height of his seat and declination of the backrest, the mailcart shot past and dropped a medium sized parcel into his inbox.

After scrutinizing it momentarily and deciding it didn't contain anything that would require his immediate attention, he slowly peeled away the shipping tape and packaging to reveal bold commerical type reading: "SSS Deluxe!"

"The Staple Stamper Stapler Deluxe!" he exclaimed aloud, quickly tearing it from the box and holding it up high to the ceiling to be illuminated by the flourescents above, as he rotated slowly around on his arse.

It was only when his supervisor approaced and inquired as to what it was, that he explained: "It's a stapler that uses straight wire instead of ready made staples! Although it looks like an ordinary stapler, it has special mechanisms enclosed that cut-to-length, bend and eject staples with the same downward force used to staple papers together. All you have to do is load it with straight wire!"

"What's the benefit of that?" inquired the supervisor. "Well, it cuts a step out of value added production and more straight wire can be shipped in a smaller package than staples, which reduces stapling costs drastically!" responded the enthused employee in a single stagnant breath.

“Yeah! The wire is loaded in and is pushed forward by a similar spring mechanism as any other stapler. Then when you push on it, the cutter cuts the wire and presses the wire over the staple template inside and then retracts to release the ready made staple into the paper!” “The only difference is that the staple comes out vertically instead of horizontally!”

But the supervisor was gone because he didn’t really give a shit.

schmendrick, Sep 08 2005

Like this?--Spool-O-Wire Fastener http://www.oldstapl...m/spool_o_wire.html
From 1908 [ldischler, Sep 09 2005]

Staple-Less Stapler http://www.virtuals...ry/paperstapler.asp
Lowers stapling costs even further, plus it's harder to staple your lip to your collar while you're trying to impress that cute software engineer. [Detly, Sep 09 2005]

[link]






       Oh my. A [+] to you, mostly because the last sentence made me laugh my swivel-chair residing ass off. The idea seems sound enough as well. lmscrao, that last sentence. Ahh, you've made my day...
quaero curvus, Sep 08 2005
  

       Well, I'm envisioning some training required, specifically in how to clear a jam and reload in combat. And I'm not sure about the economics, but a (+) for the philosophy.
normzone, Sep 08 2005
  

       Old stuff. See link.
ldischler, Sep 09 2005
  

       thanks. i knew it was a good idea.
schmendrick, Sep 09 2005
  

       They're generally known a stitchers rather than staplers and are usually electrically powered. The force needed to stich is greater than that used to staple as it need to cut and bend the wire as well as stitch.
st3f, Sep 09 2005
  

       I hope you don't mind my hijacking your idea for this, schmendrick, but I've been on the lookout for one of those staple-less staplers (as per Detly's link) for ages (I have some paperwork that I want to staple, then later shred, then recycle). Please email me if you know (email address in profile). Thanks.
st3f, Sep 09 2005
  

       I have one. It's inside my laser printer.
bristolz, Jan 19 2006
  
      
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