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Similar, but above the stomach to avoid processing delays, weight gain, and overloading the body's systems for removing toxins. |
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Other applications of the oesophagus diversion device:
1) Allow the designated driver to drink beer.
2) Allow those who cannot process dairly products to eat nice creamy desserts.
3) Allow those on a diet to eat normally, turning the valve when they have consumed the requisite number of calories. |
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Despite all this (especially number 1) I can't croissant this idea - it's too gross. I'd give you a fishbone only you'd probably have your valve switched. |
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I like this idea and award you a croissant, doughnut, Mars bar and chocolate hobnob. Chocoholics who are prone to put on weight can chew, swallow and just simply divert it out from the digestive system. |
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This idea is kinda sorta baked. There is a procedure called a "Divided Gastric Bypass" for compulsive overeaters (or rich anorexics) which involves stapling part or the stomach closed, so it effectively has less volume. The patient looses weight because they feel full after eating small amounts of food. If the patient eats too much, they vomit. (Sounds a little like "A Clockwork Orange") |
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There is another procedure called "Vertical Banded Gastroplasty" in which a bit of plastic is stapled to the stomach lining, cutting off a section of stomach. |
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These procedures only work if the patient avoids high calorie liquids, like soda pop and ice cream. |
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I think that these are a great idea. This way you can eat with you like and not have to worry about gaining the weight. Also is a great marketing tool!! |
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Do we feel the satisfaction of eating if the food doesn't hit our gut? I'm not sure. |
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