Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Talking Garburator

"mmm...carrot tops"
  (+14, -1)(+14, -1)
(+14, -1)
  [vote for,

A garburator that is interfaced with a unit that chooses randomly, from a large upgradeable database, an amusing saying everytime the garburator is activated. A small speaker could be cleverly concealed near the sink.

"but I don't want to eat my vegetables", "please, sir, can I have some more?" or "can I have something to drink with that?" are a few that come to mind.

georgie, Feb 21 2002

The prodigal and avaricous http://home.earthli...mls/HELLVII.html#19
Translation of angel's annotation. [jutta, Feb 27 2002]


       <music>Faust's Why don't you eat carrots</music>
thumbwax, Feb 21 2002

       Us the soundbites from Little Shop of Horrors; "Feed me Seymour!".......
rbl, Feb 21 2002

       Not onions again, boo hoo...
arora, Feb 21 2002

       commentator sports - whoops sorry wrong idea.
po, Feb 21 2002

       Surely one of the more amusing "sayings" would be a recording of the sound of the garburator (these are called garbage disposals in the U.S.) itself, which would of course be played only after the user has shut off the power to the device and stuck a hand down in it.
beauxeault, Feb 21 2002

       Baked? Peter, what do children's toys have to do with garbage disposals? Too often and too easily, you dismiss ideas like this. It seems your thinking is that, since technology A and technology B exist, idea C which utilizes technology A and B must be baked. Not so, my friend. Part of the halfbakery process, I think, is putting together existing technologies in interesting ways. You don't grant credit for that.   

       Not to say I think this is a great idea, really. Disposals are loud enough as it is (at least my In-sink-erator is), and it would be difficult to hear the 'voice' over the noise.   

       But if we must, then of course it should randomly shout phrases from "The Exorcist". Or maybe the tortured screams of the eternally damned, giving indication that the disposal drain leads straight into the depths of Hell.
waugsqueke, Feb 22 2002

       Come fa l'onda là sovra Cariddi,
che si frange con quella in cui s'intoppa,
così convien che qui la gente riddi.
Qui vid'i' gente più ch'altrove troppa,
e d'una parte e d'altra, con grand'urli,
voltando pesi per forza di poppa.
Percoteansi 'ncontro; e poscia pur lì
si rivolgea ciascun, voltando a retro,
gridando: «Perché tieni?» e «Perché burli?».
Così tornavan per lo cerchio tetro
da ogne mano a l'opposito punto,
gridandosi anche loro ontoso metro;
poi si volgea ciascun, quand'era giunto,
per lo suo mezzo cerchio a l'altra giostra.
E io, ch'avea lo cor quasi compunto,
dissi: «Maestro mio, or mi dimostra
che gente è questa, e se tutti fuor cherci
questi chercuti a la sinistra nostra».
angel, Feb 22 2002

       waug, thanks for the defense. You're right, garburators are noisy. It would work best with a timer so when the power to the garburator is shut off, the saying would be played a few seconds after. Perhaps a big "brrrrrppp" is all that is required to satisfy most people. The entire unit including speaker would be mounted under the sink and the voice would appear to originate from the garburator.
georgie, Feb 27 2002

       Can it do angry? "I don't take chewing gum", "for G*ds sake put the ring pulls in the bin"! - "I don't do cigarettes"??
arora, Feb 27 2002

       I love this idea. Ought to have a way to change the sayings, though, maybe little bitty CDs (there's a whole new market!).   

       Be sure to have one say "NOOOO! Not artichoke leaves!!!" because that was the first thing I put down our new garbage disposal. BIG mistake.
threeoutside, Feb 28 2002

       threeoutside, what happened with the artichoke leaves? I would have thought that if a sink disposal unit should take anything, that would be it! (of course, sink disposal machines are an ecological disaster..)
pfperry, Sep 07 2002

       (threeoutside) do the leaves stink or something???   

37PiecesOf Flair, Apr 13 2005

       I'll bun this one, only because I dream of putting Carrot Top into a garburator.
disbomber, Apr 14 2005


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