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Tear and Wear Condominimums

Making safe sex as fast and convenient as Kleenex tissues
  [vote for,

We call them Condominimums because they’re a cluster of prophylactics packaged in a minimum of space. A twenty round dispenser packet lies discreetly in a wallet or purse or on the bedside table.

Our tear and wear model is really a latex tube, sealed and perforated in curves at intervals, not completely unlike continuous trash bags. Pull one from the dispenser and it easily separates from the others, then roll-up-roll-on for wear.

Our deluxe model is not roll-your-own but still lives up to our goal of compact loving. Here, each condom’s reservoir nipple is locked on the nipple under it like a clothes snap. A tiny tug frees the condom from the dispenser with a reassuring “thwahpp”.

All orders over $100 will include free of charge one tingly, tickly jellyfish rubber delivered in a see-through water pouch.

FarmerJohn, Mar 05 2004


       // tickly jellyfish rubber //   

       Stop it, [FJ], you're making my eyes water. +
saker, Mar 05 2004

       I find that condom's tear plenty under normal circumstances. I'm afraid to encourage any potential of more 'broken condom babies'
imagine002, Mar 05 2004

       //with a reassuring “thwahpp”.//   

       And thats for starters.
skinflaps, Mar 05 2004

       The word "tear" also concerns me when taling about condoms.
DrCurry, Mar 05 2004

       If they popped up like tissues, and didn't actually "tear" apart, but through some geometric detail, followed the previous one part way up the hatch, then some tearing and torn edge concerns might be able to be alleviated.
oxen crossing, Mar 06 2004

       FJ, + for even needing a condom dispenser!
Dently, Mar 06 2004

       Who developed the reservoir tip, and of all possible choices, why was it assigned the name, "reservoir?" Are you really gonna be using the leftovers in the future?
WordUp, Mar 06 2004

       I'm having trouble picturing how you put it on. Is the lubricant on the inside, and you put the tip on your head and proceed to fold it right-side-out, putting the lube on the outside...?
Eugene, Mar 06 2004

       The cheapie tear-able type is outside-lubed and must be rolled up before applying as other condoms. I was playing with the idea of pulling it on like a sock with a hole in the tip to release trapped air, but thought it lacking in some respect.
FarmerJohn, Mar 07 2004

       It seems to me that if you have to roll it yourself, you're just exchanging one time waster (opening the packet) for another (rolling it).
Eugene, Mar 07 2004

       I agree, though it's still a space-saver.
FarmerJohn, Mar 07 2004

       That has not been disputed. +
sartep, Mar 07 2004


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