h a l f b a k e r y
Fewer ducks than estimates indicate.
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
or get an account
we already have "tele-zappers", but wheres the fun in just shutiing these annoying phone calls out?
what if there was a service you could buy for a very small monthly cost that would recieve all your telemarketing calls for you.. the people working for this service would be called "re-telemarketers"
so when your private operator recieves the call and is asked if they would like to purchas new windows, doors, countertops, life insurance etc. the operator with than procede to say "no thanks.... but ive got a wonderful set of encyclopedias that i know youll love" in effect these companies would volley back with there own salespitch
To add to your service, you could have a screening company which analysed the incoming telemarketing calls and re-directed them to another of their direct rivals. Encyclopedia salesmen would end up trying to sell their wares to other encyclopedia salesmen and such like. Beyond the increasingly frenetic shouts down the phone, insults to the telemarketing bosses :'THIS ISN'T IN THE BLOODY SCRIPT!!!!!', the only way to resolve their disputes would be duels to the death with their own products, with vacuum cleaners or double glazing sheet duels at dawn proving particularly entertaining.
||we could generate an infinite loop by re-directing them to another of their own telemarketers. round and round it goes.
I like the duel to death idea, you say your vacuum cleaner sucks, well mine sucks more! I demand satisfaction sir!! The 3 vinyl cladeteers could ride around duelling other inferior vinyl cladders, bedding woman and protecting the monarch. Fun for all and all for fun!