Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Auto-Jailer or "The Last Ride" system

The boy smashed the window of the car. Fumbled under the dash for a moment. The car started. He hears a faint whirring and knows his days of jacking cars is over...
 
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O.K.. so somebody is gonna jack your car. maybe he is gonna sell it or perhaps its a stupid dare or something. So he gets into the car. Everything is going to plan. He hotwires it. No problems yet... He begins to drive. All is well... 60 seconds pass... a quick whirring sound and he is slammed into the dash as the car stops. Instantaniously thin metal sheets shoot up covering all windows (front included) a yeild light emerges from the roof of the cab and fluorescent beacons warn those around that the vehicle is unmanned (the lockdown process should take around 2-3 seconds). suddenly the car starts up again and drives itself to the nearest police station with a very confused Thief in the front seat. the vehicle arrives at its destination where a group of officers (Pre-warned by a warning signal in the car) wait to escort the perp to a nice little cell untill his trial. Please ppl i've had 3 of my cars stolen. Support this 1.
bovinemilk, Feb 19 2004

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       The police out here are using decoy cars with tracking devices in them already.....
normzone, Feb 19 2004
  

       this isn't a decoy. It is in YOUR car.
bovinemilk, Feb 19 2004
  

       this isn't a decoy. It is in YOUR car.
bovinemilk, Feb 19 2004
  

       need i say it again?
bovinemilk, Feb 19 2004
  

       I especially like the part where thae car gets into fifty accidents on the way to the police station.
Maybe just pull to the side and have an officer show up to investigate.
yabba do yabba dabba, Feb 19 2004
  

       [bovinemilk] No it's not, it's in YOUR car. I decline....
normzone, Feb 19 2004
  

       Why bother taking it to the station? Just leave it there for three to five years, with parole.
Detly, Feb 19 2004
  

       baked... There are specially design cars that are used as decoys by the police and they can be shut down automatically by remote control, so they only get about a block away.   

       They automatically lock their doors which cannot be opened from the inside.   

       One of the cities in NE US recently used this to round up a dozen or so repeat car thieves.
zigness, Feb 19 2004
  

       I'll support this in principle, but I don't see how you're going to get the car to drive itself anywhere. Besides, if the car thief can hotwire it to start it, couldn't he also turn it off? Maybe it could just lock itself down and, alert the cops, and refuse to budge (until the cops give it the right signal).
ConsultingDetective, Feb 19 2004
  

       i suppose the part where it drives itself is a bit far-fetched but is the rest ok?
bovinemilk, Feb 19 2004
  

       //he is slammed into the dash as the car stops. Instantaniously thin metal sheets shoot// through his various body parts forever ending his crime spree.
swamilad, Feb 20 2004
  

       Great idea!!! That'll teach those thieves.
TheMadScientist, Feb 20 2004
  

       Sounds very improbable. Where are you going to hide shutters for all the windows?
kropotkin, Feb 20 2004
  

       In the widshield wipers?   

       This is a little far-fetched, but I like [Detly]'s suggestion. Jolly well just have lock-down, call-the-cops feature. Forget the self-driving for a minute.
k_sra, Feb 20 2004
  

       //Jolly well just have lock-down, call-the-cops feature.//   

       I was thinking, just the lock down.
Detly, Feb 20 2004
  

       With parole.
yabba do yabba dabba, Feb 20 2004
  

       <flashing light> WARNING: Low on cop repellant <fl>   

       E"quip" the lock-down car with zingy one-liners.
Letsbuildafort, Feb 20 2004
  

       "You couldn't jump start a lighter..."
k_sra, Feb 20 2004
  

       Equip the lock down with Michael Bolton music, if you can call it that.
yabba do yabba dabba, Feb 20 2004
  

       Sitting in a pitch black car listning to Michael Bolton!!! Isn't that a bit hasrsh? Getting arrested is one thing but physchological torture is a bit sadistic.
TheMadScientist, Feb 20 2004
  

       Funny to hear this coming from the mad scientist.
yabba do yabba dabba, Feb 20 2004
  

       They called him maaaad at the university! But not at the music conservatory....   

       Or did you mean his spelling?
ConsultingDetective, Feb 21 2004
  
      
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