Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Beat Box

For those who just can't figure it out.
  (+4, -1)
(+4, -1)
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I feel that I should preface this with a brief definition of "beatboxing," just in case you don't know. Beatboxing is the act of simulating a wide range of instrumental sounds using the hands cupped around the lips as a natural cavity of resonance, and emitting strange sounds from the aforementioned lips. It is downright fascinating, at least to me, to observe large groups of people doing this in unison. It is a skill like any other in that it takes extensive practice to develop, and let us face it, the working class just does not have that kind of time. Enter the Beat Box. The Beat Box is basically an instrument very similar to animal calls used in hunting in that it requires air to be blown through it and it translates that air into sound, only these sounds are not the squeals of dying cottontails but bold party beats; like a harmonica, it can be played both by drawing and blowing air. Now, suppose you attach to this basic instrument a hollow plastic bubble which, when compressed, pushes air through the instrument, and when pressure is released, returns to its original shape, thus drawing air in through the instrument. Now, suppose that this hollow plastic bubble is not in the shape of a bubble, but more like an accordion; when one section is collapsed by the appropriate amount of mouth pressure, one sound is produced. Two sections, a different sound (two-toned). Release the pressure, and the sound varies yet again. So tabs for this device would read something like '(bite) down 2, up (release pressure) 1, down 3, up 3, down 1, 2, 3..." Remember, you still have to cup your hands around your mouth, 1. for their original purpose, to enhance the sound, and 2. To impress your friends who think you've learned to "beatbox all sick." The Beat Box is available in bass, tenor, alto, soprano.
monk, Feb 27 2007

Beatbox kitchen http://www.dailymot...5_beatbox-fame-game
Boom baap! [wagster, Feb 28 2007]


Murdoch, Feb 27 2007

       What would you like clarified, Murdoch?
monk, Feb 27 2007

       I'm a bit shaky on particle physics, and the alleged sexual subtexts of some of Shakespeare's plays and sonnets can play havoc with a straightforward appreciation of them as art. Also, I'm not entirely clear why ice cream gives me brainfreeze when I eat it too quickly, but mainly I just have not the foggiest notion what your description of the mechanics of, and tab for, your bellows-powered Bobby McFerrin-ator mean.
Murdoch, Feb 27 2007

       Okay, a problem that broad is not my problem. I guess you will have to live without the knowledge.
monk, Feb 28 2007

       Is that "not my problem" as in "I don't know, either" or as in "I'm so clever you can see my cleverness from space and I'm not telling you 'cos I don't want to"? Even had the problem been narrow, it wasn't your problem. ;)   

       I would like a clearer (if poss) explanation of how your idea works so that I can maybe visualise it. You needn't worry about the Shakespeare, particle physics and ice cream stuff, though.
Murdoch, Feb 28 2007

       I can visualize it, but it still seems far more complex than beatboxing. Not that that's ever stopped an idea before.   

       Here's a (link) of a man demonstrating how to cook up some breaks. I strongly advise viewing by all.
wagster, Feb 28 2007

       Sounds like a gonflable kazoo thingy bob.
skinflaps, Feb 28 2007

       "gonflable kazoo thingy bob"   

       Brilliant. Possibly the most unlikely conjunction of words I'll read this week. Unless I read "Billy Cobham to give up the drums for Monk's Beat Box"
Murdoch, Feb 28 2007

       I have no idea what any of you people are talking about.*

Has [monk] invented a mouth-blown concertina?

*(Except the ice cream; I understand the bit about the ice cream.)
angel, Feb 28 2007

       Do tell.
Murdoch, Feb 28 2007

       What frank said. Ihave to go for a lie down now
the dog's breakfast, Feb 28 2007

       //Do tell./

I meant that I understand the question; I have no idea what the answer is.
angel, Feb 28 2007

       I've done some research on this. I think it's because cold ice cream molecules permeate through your skull from your mouth because they are drawn to the brain by its warmth. When the cold molecules touch the brain-organ molecules, they make the nerve-end ganglion roots, which are made of hard skin, react by violently whacking themselves off the inside of the skull, which results in a cold headachey feeling, otherwise known to medical science as brainfreeze.   

       You can counteract this by pouring hot chocolate fudge sauce over your ice cream. It fools your brain into thinking the ice cream's not as cold as it is by use of serotonins - another name for cocoa powder - which also make you feel like you've just made love.
Murdoch, Feb 28 2007

       //Is that "not my problem" as in "I don't know, either" or as in "I'm so clever you can see my cleverness from space and I'm not telling you 'cos I don't want to"? //   

       Somewhere in between, sans arrogance. My issue with your question is that I wrote an idea description which described the idea in a way that I felt was fairly straightforward and clear; Since I don't know how your brain works and why it couldn't work around the first description, I have no idea how to go about writing a second. If you could ask me any specific questions about the idea, I could answer them. I'll try to sum it up: A small instrument which you place in your mouth and then bite down on and release in specific patterns with your hands cupped in front of your mouth as a chamber of resonance, thus producing an effect synthetic of natural "beatboxing," a skill which some are unable or unwilling to master.
monk, Feb 28 2007

       Only kidding, matey. I'm in the "unwilling" camp, by the way.   

       boom chk buh-buh boom boom chk, buh-buh boom boom chk chk, buh bah boom bosssshhhhhhh!   


       I'm rubbish.
Murdoch, Feb 28 2007

       sp. buh-boh boom
methinksnot, Feb 28 2007

       So basically this is an instrument imitating people imitating instruments.   

       What will you come up with once they start beatboxing the Beat Box?
placid_turmoil, Feb 28 2007

       I will probably go beat off into a box in a Dada-esque show of defiance.
monk, Feb 28 2007

       Okay, so I could have this all wrong, but...   

       1) Take a set of Scottish bagpipes.   

       2) Stomp on them. (please!)   

       3) Stomp on them again. (Yeeeah Baaaby)   

       4) Present to kilted, be-blinged 12-year old.   

       Again, correct me if I have the wrong impression of your idea.
m_Al_com, Mar 01 2007

       Um...You have the wrong impression of my idea. But only because a set o' scottish bagpipes, no matter how thoroughly stomped, will not fit in somebody's mouth. Props for thought, though.
monk, Mar 01 2007

       Ah, I get it now. [+]
m_Al_com, Mar 03 2007

       //But only because a set o' scottish bagpipes, no matter how thoroughly stomped, will not fit in somebody's mouth.//

They might if they were blended.
angel, Mar 03 2007

       //I have no idea what the answer is.//
[angel] The answer is *42*.
(have you not seen Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy?)
xandram, Mar 03 2007

       I humbly submit that your idea would benefit from the judicious use of paragraph breaks. Maybe it's just because I've been studying all day and my eyes are a bit fried, but I'm having trouble parsing your block of solid text.
5th Earth, May 08 2007


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