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The Fuzz Free Parties

Prevents parties being broken up by the fuzz
  [vote for,

We've all been in this situation, well, some of us have, or, maybe most of you haven't, but anyway, the parties going great until the cops arrive and ruin all the fun. So I propose, International Waters Parties! These parties start with healthy activities like basketball and Scrabble as the ship steams out of Law infested waters, but once safely out of reach of any jurisdiction, the fun really starts. Just imagine! No noise complaints, no possibility of unwanted visitors, no restrictions on the type or quantity of "disco treats" you can consume. Let it all hang out in a week long orgy of sex drugs and rock n roll! When it's all said and done, you have plenty of time to nurse yourself back to something resembling a human being before you have to venture out into that horrible thing called reality.
Eggplant, Sep 13 2009


       Oh. I thought it said The Fuzz Free Panties.
I'm pretty sure I saw the Simpsons do this one.
jaksplat, Sep 13 2009

       "Fuzz" ?
How very quaint.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Sep 13 2009

       I'm pretty sure party cruises already exist... and do so with already well-defined problems:   

       How does one get the "disco treats" onboard from a country where they are banned?   

       Who operates the vessel, and ensures you are in fact in international waters while everyone else is partying like maniacs? Also, how do you keep smashed and horny individuals from taking the operators away from their responsibilities?   

       What flag do you fly to evade legal sanctions?   

       How does one avoid running afoul of international laws... such as child sex laws, human trafficking, and drug smuggling... and what do you do with the individuals who came on the cruise just to engage in said acts.   

       In the absence of law-enforcement officials, what happens if someone is, or claims to be taken advantage of?   

       How does one make this venture both cost-effective and time-effective?   

       This last question is in fact a major issue, as the individuals who desire to party hardy the most tend to be least able to afford it, and most ready to party hardy in their current location regardless of the illegality of the process.
ye_river_xiv, Sep 13 2009

       You wouldn't be able to come back into port until every last pill and powder had been consumed. Which is great until some nutter with kilo of coke jumps aboard.   

       I won't bone this one though, because I really like the idea of starting a proper party with a bit of scrabble. That has style.
wagster, Sep 13 2009

       Ok this idea is fraught with problems but some of the ones mentioned here are easily solved.   

       //How does one avoid running afoul of international laws... such as child sex laws, human trafficking, and drug smuggling... and what do you do with the individuals who came on the cruise just to engage in said acts.//   

       This isn't the sort of cruise you take your kids on, so no kids on board. With drug trafficking you would have to argue it's for personal consumption and as your only leaving your country and then returning, it's hardly trafficking. A strong security force would be necessary to protect the patrons and staff.   

       //How does one make this venture both cost-effective and time-effective?//   

       Good one. Not sure if you can. It's true the sort of people who would enjoy these parties are the least able to afford them. I'm pretty sure stupidly rich people do this sort of thing all ready, so you can't really have a high roller section or anything. Oh well...
Eggplant, Sep 13 2009

       i feel Eggplant's need for a fuzz-free party solution. I don't think this is the solution - I've seen similar things tried in the Bay Area on ferry-type boats. partying on boats kidna sucks (if you're a normal type partier, not a sailor) because you feel trapped - can't get out when you want to. Good parties are tough to make happen; feeling trapped really kills a buzz. Desert parties seem to work pertty well, though still police-prone. How about hiring native american land? Or just a private farm? e.g. Woodstock?
white, Sep 14 2009

       I'm trying to come to terms with becoming a boring old fart but really, can't you kids have fun without extremely loud music, drugs, alcohol and orgies? What's wrong with holding hands and drinking tea? - Even if you do like it a bit more rock and roll, you don't to go to the point where the police have to comerestore the peace. That's not fun, not a good partie, that's just stupid.
zeno, Sep 14 2009

       I like this term "illegal parties" it just sounds funny. What makes a party illegal? Is it when there is a disproportionate amount of old people to young people? Or gatecrashers to legitimate partygoers? Not enough people wearing party hats? Please define.   

       No Unna, I'm not from the east coast where a few incidents such as what you described have occurred.   

       //They usually involve stabbings, riots and the trashing of the host's parents' house.//   

       Easy now, don't let a few overblown media reports lead you astray. The reality is that these things on occasion do happen but they are a rarity. The Media love it because it's sex, drugs, rock n roll and violence to boot, what a story!   

       I think [white] has a good point. Yes a boat would be claustrophobic and if the party sucked you don't want to be stuck on it for a few weeks.   

       Hey Bubba you should take a note from these guys, think up legitimate problems instead of all these vague sensationalist claims and getting all exited about cops impounding cars. What exactly does that have to do with anything?
Eggplant, Sep 14 2009


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