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The Un-apostrophe slogan

"If there's more than one, you don't use none."
  [vote for,

I tried to think of a simple way for people to remember that if it's a plural noun, you don't use an apostrophe. I came up with the above.

Serving guacamole, chips and tacos? If you're tempted to write "chip's" or "taco's", just think of the slogan: If there's more than one, don't use none." Egregious error averted.

I realize that this may cause a few errors to be newly made, e.g. "its" doesn't take an apostrophe even though there's only one thing... but think of the vast majority of cases that will be prevented!

I would like to see this slogan placed on video games, political brochures, street signs, TV ads (especially ads which show one person at a time from all different cultures and each person says the same thing out loud in a different accent), public murals, radio announcements, and website banners. If a major rap artist could write a song based on this slogan, that would be even better.

phundug, Jun 25 2003

Those Pesky Apostrophe's http://www.spinnwebe.com/tpa/
From another site I visit. Complete with evidence. [phoenix, Oct 17 2004]

Grammar for Dummies http://cda.dummies....tCd-0764553224.html
384 pages on how to write so that your English teacher would be impressed. [Cedar Park, Oct 17 2004]

The Blue Book http://www.grammarbook.com/
If in doubt, check it out. [saker, Oct 17 2004]

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       Slogan's aren't all bad. Just look at gem's like: "If the glove doesn't fit you must acquit."
bristolz, Jun 25 2003

       [bris], was your apostrification on purpose? Grr'rr!
phundug, Jun 25 2003

       Of cour'se it wa's.
snarfyguy, Jun 25 2003

       Pretentious apostrophes. They belong in some language like polish or vietnamese, where those malcontents decorate up the good roman characters with a bunch of bristles and dangly bits. Just leave them out and folks will know what you mean.
bungston, Jun 25 2003

bristolz, Jun 25 2003

       "Apostrophe's for Dummies" by Wiley Publishing.
Cedar Park, Jun 25 2003

       Don't get me started on this... I work with educationalists, and their degree of illiteracy is often truly astounding.   

       "If in doubt, leave it out." Think about it. Statistically, if people did, there would be far fewer errors.   

       How about just teaching English teachers how to teach proper use of the apostrophe?   

       I find it sad, but true, that I worry less about illegal apostrophication than I do about the seemingly ubiquitous disregard for even elementary spelling and grammar. Oh, all right, I'm wheeling my soapbox back under the bed...   

       Oh, and [link].
saker, Jun 26 2003

       [Saker] In your link, the section marked Author starts with "Lecturer, consultant, and television talk show guest". I'm not sure that last one really adds much weight to her qualifications as a grammar teacher.   

       Being an old git I prefer Fowler's myself.
Gordon Comstock, Jun 26 2003

       (pedant alert) [buddha_pest]'s cartoon link tells us not to use an apostrophe make words like VCR plural. Last time I checked, VCR wasn't a word, and it's proper to use an apostrophe to make it plural because you're denoting a contraction. The letters 'ecorder' are elided, hence VCR's. No?
snarfyguy, Jun 26 2003

       Two of my trusty fave books on grammar: "Woe is I" and "Sin and Syntax."
bristolz, Jun 26 2003

       First of all, your slogan contains a double negative, "don't use none" which would actually tell people to "use some." Being in the military, we have an acronym for everything. [snarf] is correct, on one count: acronyms when made plural can have an apostrophe. Or not. It's optional. My military brethren, however, seem to apply apostrophe to anything with the letter "s" at the end. It drives me mad!
wittyhoosier, May 11 2006

       The double negative here serves to (a) make it rhyme without repetition, and (b) make it memorable [if only because of its annoyingness].
phundug, May 11 2006


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