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Useless Chachkies I Already Own

Spammers of the World, Cooperate
  [vote for,

I made a mistake. A big mistake. I ordered a laser thermometer.

Now I cannot escape thermometers. No, not in online ads -- but in spam. Nothing I do, no junk rule filter no unsubscribe, no action can convince the enterprising hand held laser thermometer work from home spammers that I don't need one, since I already have one.

I don't even mind spam, but can I get like different spam? How many thermometers do these people think I need?


theircompetitor, May 14 2020

How to solve this problem Use_20cookies_20to_...tes_20look_20better
[hippo, May 18 2020]


       Buy them all, get a world monopoly, and the sell them at vast markup and make meelions.
pocmloc, May 14 2020

       If you want different spam, go shopping online for something else. Mechanical, key-less deadbolt for example ... by next morning, spammers will be sending you ads for all manner of Judaica. Why? Because Orthodox Jews may neither carry keys nor operate electrical switches on the Sabbath ... so if you want to lock/unlock a door without using a key or electricity, you must be Jewish.   

       Naturally, these deadbolts are called "kosher locks."
kdf, May 14 2020

       Yeah, the spammers (like the ad software) just aren't clever enough. They need to be able to find connections to other products, then advertise/push those.
So after you've looked at/purchased a thermometer, they could bring up things like hot water bottles, aspirin, chicken soup...
[kdf]; don't get me started on the stupid sabbath rules...
neutrinos_shadow, May 14 2020

       Sabbath rules? Would you rather discuss what is and isn't kosher for Passover?
kdf, May 14 2020

       //Chackies// Isn't it "tsotkas" ? Russian for "random crap".
FlyingToaster, May 15 2020

       // what is and isn't kosher for Passover? //   

       Kosher is kosher, irrespective of the season/festival. Now, some comestibles may be forbidden at certain times- hence only unleavened bread at Passover- but that's not within the scope of kosher; the Mishna gives the full low-down on what's permissible.   

       Or possibly it's Talmudic.
8th of 7, May 15 2020

       Or possibly you’re just a asshole, 8th, to quibble over one word (kosher) used in a joke. But if I find a more fitting word I’ll let you know.   

       Edit to add: Looked it up ... kosher simply means proper, fitting, or allowed ... and “kosher for Passover” is an accepted usage. But “asshole” is still the best word for 8th.
kdf, May 15 2020

       "Buy them all, get a world monopoly, and the sell them at vast markup and make meelions." — pocmloc, May 14 2020   

       Best advice of the day.   

       //Meelions// sounds like a creepy crawling insect.
blissmiss, May 15 2020

       Tchotchke is my preferred variant. It's a good word. Wiki says tshotshke, tshatshke, tchachke, tchotchka, tchatchka, chachke, tsotchke, chotski, or chochke are all good too.
tatterdemalion, May 15 2020

       sp: tchotchke: a k-nick k-nack, bric-à-brac item   

       Chachkies: owned by Chachi (?); see 'Joanie Loves...'
Sgt Teacup, May 15 2020

       tsatskes : Yiddish, least amount of pollution from English.
FlyingToaster, May 15 2020

       James Leroy brought a ceramic frog to the bank in search of a mortgage."What fresh hell is this?" exclaimed the Loans Officer. The Bank Manager explained: "It's a knick knack, bric à brac--give the kid a loan--his old man's a Rolling Stone."
Sgt Teacup, May 15 2020

       //Spammers of the World, Cooperate//
// chachke, tsotchke, chotski, or chochke are all good too //

       They left out Trotsky?
pertinax, May 18 2020

       yes, but he lost the primary to Biden
theircompetitor, May 18 2020

       Better thermometers beats the glitched software's hemorrhoid cream.
wjt, May 19 2020


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