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Victimization Insurance

Not social victimization (sorry)
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Being mugged sucks. I can't back that up with personal experience, but I can hardly imagine that it'd be that enjoyable an experience, other than just the opportunity to meet new and interesting people who might pistol-whip you for fun.

But the worst part of it is the financial burden - loss of cash, valuables, and other sundry belongings, all of which must generally be replaced.

And so I present to you: Victimization Insurance (not to be confused with crime insurance, which covers businesses against fraud, theft, and ransoms). Pay a small monthly fee (say, 15 bucks a month, a similar amount to renter's insurance) and a small annual deductible (say, 50 dollars), and the insurance company will cover you against losses incurred in robberies, thefts, and, of course, kidnappings.

In order to protect the business, you'll have to present a police report number with your claim.

In order to do nothing but turn a profit, this will be offered to all people, but marketing will be targeted primarily at suburbanites. Let's face it, upper-middle-class white people are deathly afraid of being robbed, and watch too many movies and episodes of CSI - the perfect demographic for this business.

Coverage would be issued in 1-year, 5-year, and lifetime packages. Payment up front accepted.

It should be noted that this will not apply to pure financial losses, as cash is impossible to prove/disprove without a bank receipt, and financial institutions universally cover illegal use of a credit/debit card post-theft.

shapu, Oct 11 2004

Anti-Pickpocket wallet http://www.halfbake...Pickpocket_20Wallet
[shapu, Oct 11 2004]

[link]






       Replacement of valuables and personal belongings. Think wallets, jewelry, purses, photographs (high emotional value equates to a larger check), keychains, cost of replacing locks and keys, cellular phones (because not everyone buys the cell phone company's insurance), et cetera.
shapu, Oct 11 2004
  

       If you're insuring personal valuables, you run into the same problem as with cash - proving you had them in the first place. How many people out there have a receipt for their dad's watch or that dogeared picture of you plus the other half at the fair that reminds you of the first time you both ate fondu?

For this to work, you'd have to register all the items you wanted covered by the policy prior to its activation. Then you get into problems with the ever-changing collection of stuff held in pockets, I know I couldn't be bothered to keep track.
  

      
Better to clip your hair short, develop a heavy scowl and carry a fake wallet. Works for me (white middle class type, given to cheerily rambling through inner London post-night out, including ill-advised short cuts through parks).
DocBrown, Oct 11 2004
  

       For an extra 10 bucks a month, the company will maintain a list of contacts for your identity and credit cards, and contact all of those businesses and public offices for replacements as soon as you report the theft to the business. Claims can come later.   

       EDIT: [DocBrown], you might also want to consider my anti-pickpocket wallet (see link).
shapu, Oct 11 2004
  
      
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