Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Water Cooler Pet

For that ultra-kitch aquarium moment.
  [vote for,

Some idiot in our office (ahem) managed to force the new bottle of water onto the cooler without taking the plastic seal off, resulting in the sleeve being pushed up into the bottle.

Now, whenever we dispence water, it is drawn by the currents and bubbles, and resembles a carrier bag being blown in the wind.

Although I'm finding it irritating, I'm also mesmerised by its movement. Why not replace it with one of those little brightly coloured plastic fishes, to amuse the office and improve feng shui?

Bottles could contain different colour fishes, sometimes multiple fishes, and sometimes no fish at all, thus adding to the excitement of new water arriving.

Fishrat, Aug 14 2004

(?) Water cooler for your pet http://www.petco.co...s/2/2969524301B.jpg
[spiritualized, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004]

Picnic Bar, for Zanzibar http://www.cadbury...._stories/picnic.htm
[jurist, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004]

Not exactly as requested http://homepage.ntl...vending-machine.jpg
[calum, Jan 03 2005]


       I want this.
DesertFox, Aug 14 2004

       Nice idea. We have some of those "reusable ice cubes" which are fish-shaped. They could be added to the water container after the seal is taken off.
hippo, Aug 14 2004

       Brilliant. +
gardnertoo, Aug 14 2004

       What idiot spawned this idea?Hmm?.
Nice one [Fishy] +
gnomethang, Aug 14 2004

       What a nifty idea! And bakeable. You would just need the fishes to be neutrally buoyant. Full points.
bungston, Aug 14 2004

       Ducks, I want ducks.
FarmerJohn, Aug 14 2004

gnomethang, Aug 14 2004

       Back away from the duck, Farmer, or I'll be forced to take this to the top!
blissmiss, Aug 14 2004

       Christmas snow scene, anyone?
Fishrat, Aug 15 2004

       I'd love to see a water cooler with a miniature Harry Houdini floating around inside it.
spiritualized, Aug 15 2004

       Or sea monkeys.   

       But definitely not a floating turd.
Ling, Aug 15 2004

       Cool! In fact Cooler!
Does your Feng Shui need improving?
cloudhedd, Aug 15 2004

       Excellent! croissants for you on this fine idea.   

       Maybe use it for advertising?
Around TUIT, Aug 15 2004

       This is one of the best ideas I've read. :)
Detly, Aug 15 2004

       We have a water filter....can I get filtered fishes ?
normzone, Aug 15 2004

       <Soup Nazi>No gefilte fish zoup for you! Come back one year!<Soup Nazi>
jurist, Aug 16 2004

       Although the Cadbury Picnic brand name seems to have several variations, there's a Picnic Bar link above. Seems to be something like a Baby Ruth, Oh Henry, or Goo Goo Clusters, but with the addition of raisins, and probably a bit saltier, like a PayDay.
jurist, Aug 16 2004

       Ah, bugger... nearly got to 30 before I was autoboned.
Fishrat, Aug 16 2004

       Now Fishrat thats simply fantastic ...Where were u man, Allright but no body mentioned if it would be Sea water sometimes too...and yes something for Nose buds too like say....fresh as spring or pungent as a Sewage treatment plant....Oh god excuse me its going no where ....By the way woth mentioning....I am at office right now.
smooth operator, Aug 16 2004

       [smooth] not so smooth, sober up and try again.
dentworth, Aug 16 2004

       What is autoboning?
energy guy, Aug 16 2004

       //What is autoboning?//   

       Sounds kinda kinky, if you ask me.
destructionism, Aug 16 2004

       Very cool, can we have fish that float up and down depending on what the temperature is?
scubadooper, Aug 16 2004

       //What is autoboning?//   

       The auto'boner is a mystical halfbaker who lurks on the site 24 hours a day, suddenly [fish]boning ideas which seem to be gathering positive comment, without themselves posting a negative comment. He may also be an invention of vain, insecure halfbakers who don't like their ideas attracting negative votes.
Fishrat, Aug 16 2004

       both/either will do fine thank-you
scubadooper, Aug 16 2004

       The water cooler is just 5 feet away here... I wish it had little fishies inside
eulachon, Aug 16 2004

       I love it but... I would want all the acoutrements. The scuba diver, the bubbling treasure chest, the little bits of plastic kelp, and little wrecked ship in the bottle.The problem is it that it would take an hour to fish all the stuff out and change the bottle of water. Soggy croissants.
Spare parts, Aug 16 2004

       But that's the great part. I think [fish] is going for this to be implemented by the water cooler company. You just send the bottle back with fish and accompanying items. A new and different selection will be in next week's bottle.
Worldgineer, Aug 16 2004

       I really cannot see a downside to this one. I'm just surprised that its gone unbaked for all these years. I like the idea of the element of surprise - having different floaters (kind of like bertie botts beans).
energy guy, Aug 16 2004

       <dumbledore> Alas, earwax! </dumbledore>
Fishrat, Aug 16 2004

       Can I get a fishrat in ours?
k_sra, Aug 16 2004

       //I don't think I've seen an idea take off like this since I've been here.// [AO]'s Coffeecup Watermark idea springs to mind - it certainly got my vote fairly quickly. [k_sra] I'll talk to George Lucas about getting some plastic fishrat figurines reproduced at once...
Fishrat, Aug 16 2004

       There must be something wrong with you... If I wanted to put anything foreign in a water cooler it would be something that tasted better than a fish...
madness, Aug 16 2004

       //it tastes like fish piss//   

       Won't ask, don't tell...
swimr, Aug 16 2004

       [Fishrat] I cannot give you a fish for this brilliant idea. I love the idea of the randomness of the inclusions. Brilliant! [+]
Klaatu, Aug 16 2004

       You could put magnets in the fish. Then, when you rub a magnet along the outside, it looks like you are feeding them!
Around TUIT, Aug 16 2004

       As long as you don't put LIVE fish/ducks/miniature Harry Houdinis in it.   

       And of course, as a halfbakery original, we need little floating plastic half-croissants.
nick_n_uit, Aug 16 2004

       Tie the water cooler to the back of a large turtle and let it wander around the office all day, I say. Im tired of walking those 3 yards to the watercooler (and back!)
rumbletumbler, Aug 17 2004

       If this idea is ever baked I will have to insist on having a water cooler in every room of the house and office. This is too cool not to be everywhere.
Machiavelli, Aug 17 2004

       I might try this.
david_scothern, Aug 17 2004

       [Spare Parts] too much stuff, you are supposed to drink the water,   

       I go for a clean plastic fishy or two, and a variety in each bottle. I'm still worried about the fishy getting caught in the down spout, would there be some kind of net or screen in the bottle to keep the fishes afloat, or would the air bubble bobble him up out of the way?
dentworth, Aug 17 2004

       The seasonal snow-scene version would definately need a small filter near to the neck of the bottle, but I think the fishes would be fine without one. But I could add one just in case, if you're losing sleep?
Fishrat, Aug 17 2004

       filter good. .... sleeeeep ....gooder.
dentworth, Aug 17 2004

       Instead of snow, why not have winter-themed pets? Polar bears, penguins, Sir Robert Scottcicle, et cetera.
shapu, Aug 17 2004

       [fishrat] I told people in my office about this one, and there have been quite a few requests. Do you mind if I try this out? (remebering of course that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery)
energy guy, Aug 17 2004

       Super dooper idea, I like it very much, man ! . I'm not so sure about his "Feng Shui". Is it good to eat?. You could use live triops, with some sea monkeys to serve them as food, and that would be really interesting: first the triops eating all the sea monkeys, then canibalizing each other. Nah. Too much. Croissant as it is.
finflazo, Aug 17 2004

       go for your life, [energy guy] but make sure we see the pictures!
Fishrat, Aug 17 2004

       (and make sure you sanitize whatever you put in there)
Worldgineer, Aug 17 2004

       I stare at the water cooler and wonder how [guy] is going to do it with aftermarket fish.   

       After all, it's sealed and breaking the seal at all before putting it on would result in massive leaking. If you get the fish in, be sure to post the method as we all will want to do it! I'm thinking wedge the (very small) fish against the seal on the bottle, then put it on gently.
eulachon, Aug 17 2004

       Thats what I was planning to do. The real issue is as [world] pointed out - sanitizing it. I'll let you know if anyone dies....
energy guy, Aug 17 2004

       Your water bottles have seals? Why do you need the fish?
Worldgineer, Aug 17 2004

       No, really. The water bottles I've dealt with before come with a cap, which you pull off and as you turn the bottle over water spills out. This is fine, as it's pouring into the water tank. You just have to get it all the way in before the tank is filled too far.   

       As for sanitizing it - boil it in water for a few minutes first.
Worldgineer, Aug 17 2004

       You could take the cap off the bottle, put the fish in, and then invert the water cooler stand over the bottle...
Detly, Aug 17 2004

       [Detly]'s got it...that seems like the easiest way. Just make sure they sink to the bottom before inverting it, otherwise the fishies'll pour right out.
shapu, Aug 17 2004

       I once went to a posh restaurant in Manchester and I'm sure they had real fish in the toilet cistern. I can't imagine how they avoided being flushed -I was too drunk to investigate sufficiently.
Fishrat, Aug 18 2004

       [shapu] if the fish would sink to the bottom when you put them in, then they won't float at all when you invert it.   

       What you need is something ballasted so it floats several inches under the water - maybe 5, 6 inches? And large/soft enough that it can be wedged into the tank, and wedged out, but won't slip through the neck without sufficient force (think of a squshy toy)
MaineCoon, Aug 18 2004

       I'm just concerned about the lower density that comes from water rushing out of the neck of a bottle into a cooler...water mixing with air moving upward for a brief second. the zero-bouyancy fish would fall downward when the thing was inverted, and so would have to be near what would eventually be the top of the bottle. They'd stabilize themselves after water stopped moving about.
shapu, Aug 18 2004

       "You would just need the fishes to be neutrally buoyant" (bungston). That can be hard. Perhaps we can halfbake a fish whose density decreases with pressure, so it will sink until its density equals that of the water, then stay there. And since water density changes slightly with temperature (¿?) they will go up and down following temperature changes (scubadooper). A hollow soft plastic fish will do exactly the opposite, that is, increase density with pressure, so that wouldn´t do.
finflazo, Aug 18 2004

       Hmm, the seals that keep the water in my office's cooler bottles are designed to be broken by the little post in the middle of the "bottle socket", they are actually a 3-part piece of plastic that splits when you whack the bottle down. No mess! Also no easy way to get fishes in.
eulachon, Aug 18 2004

       But you're a halfbaker! There's always a way. I'm envisioning plastic wrap and duck tape.
Worldgineer, Aug 18 2004

       <ramble>In our office we have a water cooler which is filled with (filtered and yuppified) tap water. Basically its a big translucent blue cube with a tap sticking out over it. It has a Harry Potter figurine suspended in it, who is stuff of office legend; it was originally thought to have been placed by Nick-The-Office-Trickster, who has since departed, but this has recently been disproved. The stuffy facilities folk are too scared to fish Harry out, due to a series of anonymous complaints about the hygiene issues floating about.</ramble> If our cooler was one of those bottle ones, I would certainly be pushing for this. As is, I croissant the idea, and leave it at that.
araminty, Aug 19 2004

       Well, with the aid of those two most things can be accomplished. Actually, those 2 would be perfect for the fish project. I just don't know what the boss's reaction would be to the resultingly sloppy looking water cooler (and fish)
eulachon, Aug 19 2004

       Wooaa. Nice one, [Fishrat]. Top marks also for not suggesting the use of a live fish or other unfortunate being.
squeak, Aug 19 2004

       //Also no easy way to get fishes in.// That's the point - in the original idea, once they're in, they're in. They'd be there forever, a different combination in each bottle. Empty bottles sent back to the water company, and steralised without the fish ever being removed.
Fishrat, Aug 19 2004

       Seems obvious to me; tuna fish inside, with mayonaise packets sitting next to it.
blissmiss, Aug 19 2004

       Well, its not going to end world hunger!
daseva, Aug 19 2004

       //I once went to a posh restaurant in Manchester and I'm sure they had real fish in the toilet cistern. I can't imagine how they avoided being flushed -I was too drunk to investigate sufficiently//   

       [fishrat] Are you sure you werent drunk enough to be imagining the fish?
energy guy, Aug 19 2004

       Perhaps they were plastic too? in any case, [fishrat], most fish can't survive in tapwater... are they filtering their toilet water? Now that IS posh!   

       Yeah, I know the plan is for the fish to come in the bottles from the factory. I'm trying to figure out a way to add "aftermarket" fish as I would like these in my office now, and not have to wait for the halfbakery factory to be built :D
eulachon, Aug 19 2004

       I assumed that water cooler bottles used some kind of one-way flap type thing.   

       A simple seal that closes tight under the weight of the water pressing down on it when inverted, but pushes open easily enough when pressed onto the dispenser spike, or when inserting colourful gee-gaws of your choice.   

       Is there some flaw in my train of thought that I haven't noticed? I mean it seems like a pretty straight forward application of the laws of physics:   

       Bottle neck has wide lip around the edge, leaving a 3cm hole.   

       Rubber disc about 4 or 5 cm wide sits inside the neck, attached to the side in one spot.   

       Can be easily pushed open when bottle is not in use but when you invert the bottle to place it on the cooler, the water stops itself from leaking out.   

       I'm almost afraid to post this anno for fear of appearing dense....(r). But if this no-leak cap idea hasn't already been baked worldwide then I wouldn't be averse to a goodwill donation of approx. £10,000 from the eventual producer, or 10% of the fortune amassed by such an invention, whichever is the lesser value, I'm not a greedy man. TIA.   

       Ohh yeah, and the title had me thinking about people taking their pet water coolers out for an evening stroll along the riverbank to let them sprinkle in the bushes and chase the paper cups around.
Salmon Of Doubt, Apr 05 2006

       Perfect halfbakery. Can't beat it, so...   

       Add a miniature fuel cell to power an electrolysis unit which would chamber the results into a compression and expellation unit resulting in rude social behavior and much banging of fishy nose on sides of water confinement unit.   

       [edit] The unit would of course be contained in the little fishy itself.[edit]   

       H2 capture apparatus affixed to the top of container to provide amusement. :)
nth, Apr 06 2006

       Severed head of manager!
Captain_Ignorant, Apr 06 2006


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