Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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This would work fine, except in terms of success.

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Weeble Suit for the Elderly

Granny wobbles, but she doesn't fall down!
  (+13, -1)(+13, -1)
(+13, -1)
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Old Betty Bluerinse was frail and unsteady on her feet, and had lived alone since the tragic death of her husband many years ago. Her stair lift and Zimmer frame were life savers for her, allowing her the luxury of mobility within her own home, but she still lived in fear of an accidental fall; she knew that her aging muscles wouldn't help her to get back onto her feet, and if gravity got the better of her she would surely end up lying in a humiliated heap on the floor, with no option but to wait until her neighbour or grandchildren could arrive and help her back up.

Imagine her delight on Christmas Day, when her beloved grandson arrived at the door and presented her with the Wrongfellow Industries, LLC. Mark I Weeble Suit! At first it looked like a strange, long dress, but after she had inserted her arms and done up the zip, her grandson showed her how to inflate the toughened plastic lower portion using the built-in battery powered pump.

The lower section of the dress ballooned out into a wide, rounded base, and small castor wheels mounted on the bottom allowed her to shuffle around the room despite the heavy counterweights near her ankles. Motion was awkward at first, and her heart raced once or twice as she tripped over; but as she fell to the floor, her motion was slowed by the counterweights, and she found herself rocking immediately back into a safe, upright position!

Grinning broadly at her new-found confidence, she soon learned how to move around in the suit, and after a little practice she stepped outside to take a walk in the snow, for the first time since she lost her beloved Albert all those years ago.

Wrongfellow, Dec 31 2009

para-loon Para-loon_ae
[po, Dec 31 2009]

I found Albert http://lifememory.c...e0fb9a75101af2c.jpg
It has been a long time... [normzone, Dec 31 2009]

[link]






       I suggest tethering to a geostationary satellite ...
Aristotle, Dec 31 2009
  

       Sort-of Baked by the inflatable Sumo suits, but they're too low-pressure to prevent injury.   

       [+] for the intention. Good for drunks, too.
8th of 7, Dec 31 2009
  

       Might be tricky to negotiate stairs, but just too funny to vote down. Can they dress up like Daleks?
RayfordSteele, Jan 01 2010
  
      
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