Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Zero G Chickens

Encourages White meat
  (+16, -2)(+16, -2)
(+16, -2)
  [vote for,

I read an article saying that the breast and wings of chickens develop as white meat instead of dark meat because those are the least used muscles being that its a flightless bird and those muscles are used for flying. In a zero g environment, after a few hatchings, the theory is that having none of the muscles exercise for the life of the chicken, eventually you will have a 100% white meat chicken.
Arcanus, May 03 2010

Raise them in orbit and we'll deliver them cooked to your door - Orbital_20toaster
(actually to the net in your backyard) [normzone, May 06 2010]

The opposite http://jap.physiolo...pdf_extract/23/1/80
Courtesy of [MaxwellBuchanan] [mouseposture, May 06 2010]


       Plus, they'll be able to fly! That should be good for some "we treat our animals humanely" propaganda.
phundug, May 03 2010

       Fine, all you have to do is teach a creature with the IQ of a piece of damp carpet how to use a zero-Gee toilet ...   

       What will the eggs be like, we wonder ?
8th of 7, May 03 2010

       //100% white meat// Not enough to justify the expense.
However: if some means could be found to accelerate microgravity-induced decalcification, perhaps you could raise *boneless* 100% white meat chickens.
mouseposture, May 03 2010

       Go tell KFC - they will love you.
8th of 7, May 03 2010

       Being a veggie head, I'd prefer an idea for a flying chicken, with 100 % dark meat, so that it could get away from the man with the ax. But that's just me. I can appreciate the other side of the coin though.
blissmiss, May 03 2010

       I like the dark meat. Still, a [+] for creativity.
awesomest, May 03 2010

       I like the dark meat, and - for altering an animal
dentworth, May 04 2010

       Fine, [dentworth], why don't you go off somewhere on your own and reproduce asexually ?
8th of 7, May 04 2010

       [blissmiss] Thank you for that wonderful mental image of an axe-wielding cosmonaut chasing a flying chicken through a guano-encrusted Mir.
mouseposture, May 05 2010

       fruits, grains, greens, all I need. But I hear you about the phony protein wannabes.
blissmiss, May 05 2010

       // Not enough to justify the expense. // Unless you're raising and eating the chickens in orbit - then it's possibly cheaper than bringing full-grown chicken carcases up from Earth.
BunsenHoneydew, May 05 2010

       // artificial gravity // // raising ... the chickens in orbit //   

       "Artificial anti-gravity" would be energetically demanding. We assumed from the outset that this was aviculture in free-fall.
8th of 7, May 05 2010

       Underwater chickens for cultivating that dark muscle fiber everyone loves.
rcarty, May 05 2010

       // 50 megatonne orbital mass chicken grill //   

       Go on, post that. You know you want to.
8th of 7, May 05 2010

       Or go the other way - 10G chickens would have enormous legs (it's been tried).
MaxwellBuchanan, May 05 2010

       //(it's been tried)//
[MB] Give us a link, you tease!
mouseposture, May 05 2010

       If an egg is cracked by a beak, at that point, does its status jump from egg to chicken in a quantized unit? I am working on a chicken-egg quantized waveform duality theory.
RayfordSteele, May 05 2010

       Schrodinger's egg. Breaking the shell collapses the wave function and fixes the state of the potential chicken.   

       It's the old Heaviside step function again.
8th of 7, May 06 2010

       Of course, another benefit would be the ease with which the chicken meat could be frozen for transport. Stick it out the airlock, it should stay fresh for ever!   

       I wonder why astronauts don't store their food outside?
moomintroll, May 06 2010

       // it should stay fresh for ever! //   

       No, it won't. The water will slowly sublime away, followed by any other volatile components, and eventually the remains will become totally dessicated.
8th of 7, May 06 2010

       //No, it won't. The water will slowly sublime away// AKA "freezer burn." However, you could puree the chicken first, then spray it into a cold vacuum. Viola: freeze-dried chicken soup.
mouseposture, May 06 2010

       ////(it's been tried)// [MB] Give us a link, you tease!//   

       The only link I have is www.mybookshelfatmyhouse/ Iknowit'sheresomewhere.co.uk   

       The book is called "Great Mambo Chicken and the Transhuman Condition". Can't remember the author. Sounds like it should be Beanie Baby but it's not.   

       If I RC, they hatched and raised chickens in a big (astronaut-testing size) centrifuge.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 06 2010

       Bingo <link>
mouseposture, May 06 2010

       Well done, Mouseposture.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 06 2010

       // We assumed / free-fall. // Quite. The emphasis in my anno ought to be on the "and".   

       I have an inexpensive earthbound solution: Botox
BunsenHoneydew, May 08 2010

       <does best Crocodile Dundee>
"That's not free range, THAT's free range."

       That link is truly a treasure.
DrWorm, May 08 2010


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