Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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breakfast gypsy

the cornflakes are telling me something - no its gone cloudy - too much milk
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The door bell rings and a strange gypsy lady appears asking to read your fortune via breakfast cereal 'if a piece of gold passes her hand'. Once an amount is agreed upon, she lights a candle and some incense and empties a full box of cornflakes/fruit loops/muesli etc onto your kitchen table. Eyes closed as if she is channelling the gods of artificial colouring, she caresses and fondles the flakes and sultanas chanting tunes from the television commercials. After several minutes she stands back and surveys the patterns of cereal across the table to decipher to you its other worldy message.
benfrost, Dec 26 2004

But what if the cereal looks like an alien? http://www.rednova..../display/?id=107372
[DrCurry, Dec 26 2004]

Spoken Word Performance Video of the idea above: Breakfast gypsy http://www.youtube....watch?v=VNDYBvKSZkc
spoken word by ben frost @ pet cemetary at the oxford art factory, feb 7th 2008 [benfrost, Feb 12 2008]


       Breakfast gypsies, coffee bandits, supermarket pirates. I think 2005 is going retro. But what would I know under a fresh foot of snow.
mensmaximus, Dec 26 2004

       [mensmaximus] You need to have a word with your transplant surgeon.
hippo, Dec 26 2004

       [hippo], did you ever write a letter in your life asking for the internet? I did for years. How do you like it? Pretty free and easy, just the way I asked for it.
mensmaximus, Dec 26 2004

       Who were they addressed to?
tiromancer, Dec 26 2004

       Al Gore, I guess.
DrCurry, Dec 26 2004

       It seems to me that there was such a thing as the mini-tel in France in the late eighties that boasted 5000 virtual groups having similar interests. They expressed interest in expanding to Montreal. I corresponded with them and brought the internet to America.
mensmaximus, Dec 26 2004

       Well, thanks.
tiromancer, Dec 26 2004

       I think the seemliness of your seemings is a bit fruity, there, maximus.   

       In a related story, bone for the gypsy.
contracts, Dec 27 2004

       Just toying with the closet voyeur professionals. Do you think I would write this dribble to my friends? Sorry to catch you on a technicality [ben] but there is nothing strange about gypsies. You can say strangely dressed or acting strangely possibly.
mensmaximus, Dec 27 2004

       you can have *strange* anything. I have a strange cat, not to mention a strange hobby.
po, Dec 27 2004

       any lady that reads breakfast cereals and claims to be able to read your fortune, shall be deemed strange whether gypsy or not. this is debatable as some people have different understandings of what is and what isnt strange.   

       though round about point taken - it was admittedly a naieve off hand categorical generalisation towards people of the gypsy persuasion that they fall into the stereotype of fortune telling nomads that knock on doors and finger your porridge - but i did put this idea into the business: false claims to suggest this was a scam, suggesting that she may not be a gypsy at all.
benfrost, Dec 27 2004

       [benfrost], a gentleman and a scholar you are.
mensmaximus, Dec 27 2004


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