Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.

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effects pedal

battery tester to show the amount of life left in ur effects pedal
  [vote for,

it would be in a vacuum formed box which would plug in the input and the output of the effects pedal and would measure the levels coming out of it.

(I need stats becasuse i am doing my GCSE technology project, plaese tell the truth)

kurtcobain, Apr 15 2002


       The truth: EMPTY. (head)
neelandan, Apr 15 2002

       thumbwax: You want answers?
kurtcobain: I think I'm entitled to them.
thumbwax: You want answers?
cobain: I want the truth!
thumbwax: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has walls. And those walls have to be wired by men with puns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Cobain? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for technology and you curse the GCSE. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that output's reading, while tragic, probably saved volts. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves volts...You don't want the truth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall. You need me on that wall. We use words like croissant, code, custard...we use these words as the fishbone to a life spent defending something. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it! I'd rather you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a meter and get a read. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!
cobain: Did you order the fishbone?
thumbwax: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.
cobain: Did you order the fishbone?!
thumbwax: You're goddamn right I did!!
thumbwax, Apr 15 2002

       That idea made no sense at all.
Amishman35, Apr 19 2002

       Why, [Amishman35]? What's not to understand about this?
bristolz, Apr 19 2002

       ...now I go to bed laughing!
runforrestrun, Apr 19 2002

       The level of the output relative to the input is dependant on what the pedal does. If the pedal was just a box containing a non-variable gain stage, this may work; however, most guitarists constantly change pedals settings, including the volume level.

       A more feasible approach would be to include a battery tester (like those found on the battery's packaging) on the face of the pedal. The tester is wired in parallel with the battery, and is activated by depressing and holding the switch.
xrayTed, Apr 19 2002

       You're still using battery pedals? C'mon man. Get thee to a shop and pick up a multi-effects pedalboard. Everything you need in one handy package, and no batteries.
waugsqueke, Apr 19 2002

analJoe, Apr 19 2002

       Didn't mean to disturb you, Joe. Go back in your anus.
waugsqueke, Apr 19 2002

       Periodically remove the battery and test it with your tongue.
snarfyguy, Apr 22 2002

       As a soundguy myself, I'm with snarfguy. I've actually gotten quite good at telling how much juice there is in any given cell by the exact "taste" of the leads.   

       And as a musician, waugs, I must sorely disagree with you. Give me my Echoplex, my tube-based overdrive, and my chorus pedals any day of the week. Just daisy chain the wall wart and jimmy them all up to a board of your own design, including power strip, and you can forget all about that silly new "modeling" technology that's all the rage.   

       You know why that crap is so popular now? It's not. There's a huge push by the manufacturers to sell this junk, though, because it's cheap to make. The profit margin is MUCH bigger than with the genuine article. And the up and comers, 12yos with daddy's credit card, 6-string strumming underlings with nothing serious (no chops, no theory, no reading, no listening) but time on their hands don't know any different, so they go for what they think is cool. And if the guitar-faced-soloist, long-haired, purple lit cool guys in the Mars catalog all say something's cool, then by all the confessions on my dashboard, it MUST be cool! </rant> <#include stdapo.h>
absterge, Apr 22 2002

       are you still on tour absterge? Or have you settled down to civilized, pizza shop life again?
runforrestrun, Apr 22 2002

       howdy do, 'sterge. I think you're a little hard on the pedalboards. To each his own, mayhaps. Our guitarist had done just what you describe - built his own board, wired up the pedals in the order he wanted, strung the dc adaptors and had it all finished. Then he tried out a pedal board and thought it sounded even better than what he made. So he'd disagree with you, at least.
waugsqueke, Apr 22 2002

       yeah, ok, I relent, waugs. Some of them are better than others. I actually rather fondly recall one of the originals, a ZOOM board that had just about everything you might need, and then a bit more. I only recall it so fondly, though, because it was real cheap, and secondhand at that. heh. *ahem*   

       But all this other stuff, like 64,000 sounds, flutes and accordions, what kind of guitarist can actually USE that stuff? I dunno. To each his own, I suppose. :)   

       (BTW, I won't clutter the commons with personal anecdote, but I am kind of back now, with new notes on me very own user page. We've got MODs now?! LOL! More power to you loons!)
absterge, Apr 22 2002

       My Digitech RP7 is actually rather good. It has a valve (tube) in the input, so has the ability to sound like a proper amp, but I really only bought it because, for logistical reasons, I use someone else's amp (a Marshall Valvestate) on stage these days. If I were still using my Laney, I probably wouldn't bother because the amp's versatile enough to do what I want (in terms of overdrive) without pedals.
Hi, [absterge].
angel, Apr 23 2002

       One should learn to make the sounds without the artifice. Best achieved on an acoustic resonator guitar (dobro). As for the idea itself, fishbone stack is likely due to this formula: //I need stats becasuse i am doing my GCSE technology project// = Lazy
thumbwax, Apr 25 2002

       this is silly. even the flimsy boss pedals have a little red light. when it goes out, no more battery.   

       furthermore, xrayTed is exactly right. measuring output will not give you information about the level of the battery charge.   

       in my opinion, performing on stage with anything that requires a battery is asking for trouble unless the engineer is keeping track of hours. i'm both an engineer and a musician, and i never let a wireless microphone do more than three hours (or six with a vhf) on a single battery.
urbanmatador, Mar 24 2003


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