Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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fake cell phones & beepers

wanna-be important?..your solution..
  (+7, -3)
(+7, -3)
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Some people really think they are important toting cell phones and beepers on their belts..and probably are, but this is for those that unfortunately aren't and wanna be..It would come together as a set..you'd have your fake cell phone that you could set to ring periodically and also your beeper that would beep when you arranged for it to(especially when you are talking to that cute guy or gal and you want them to think someone likes you enough to call or beep you)..fake #'s would pop up on your beeper of course..not to forget the vibrating fake beepers..so you could have a little enjoyment while you are being important...just a reminder..don't have them ringing and beeping constantly or you will look FAKE!
wanda x, Nov 29 2000

Job Titles for the Jobless http://www.halfbake...les_20for_20Jobless
Sounds like these people would be your target consumers [catfish25, Oct 04 2004]

An LA Times article from wayback in 1989... http://articles.lat...ellular-subscribers
Drivers who want the status but don't need--or can't afford--the service can get a phony phone. Last year a company called Faux Systems in San Francisco started selling fake cellular sets, with inoperative antennas and plastic phone shells, for $9.95. [LoriZ, Feb 27 2012]


       i think it's great for wannabes..i think it should be the "Wanna-be cell phone & beeper company"..Perfect for no-where bound people that have a hard time getting laid..:)
stegalleti, Nov 30 2000

       What happens if someone wants to borrow your phone? Scream and run?
mrkillboy, Nov 30 2000

       Indeed, the fake phone/beeper doesn't need to ring at all! Just wear it, and whenever you're in a situation you would like to exeunt rapidly, just: 1) twitch unexpectedly; 2) look at phone/pager; 3) get up and leave the room. This is most effective with phones, since you aren't expected to say 'Goodbye."
danrue, Nov 30 2000

       In Australia practically everyone has a mobile phone. (EVEN MY MUM!) Most school children also. I'm not anyone special and my third mobile phone is wearing out. I ordered my fourth one yesterday.   

       It is actually easier to get someone on their mobile than it is by ringing them at work, then at home, then at......   

       If you ring their mobile you get them straight away - no receptionists.   

       So...If your phone rang all the time in Australia, you'd just look like an idiot.
goodie, Dec 22 2000

       Already baked. In fact, I heard an urban myth/newspaper story about this situation where this man was on a train, talking on his mobile 'phone, and someone in the carriage suffered a heart attack/some medical problem. When he was pressed to use the phone to call for help (why they didn't just press the 'speak to driver' button, I don't know), he kept refusing, until he was forced to admit that it was fake.   

       Loser. *grin*
Detly, Dec 22 2000

       Good idea. Must get the most expensive one I can, then all the muggers can mug me!!   

       Real phones that ring can interrupt embarrassing (& unwanted) guests, appointments, etc., or they could give grnad status eg have a friend phone you, who pretends that he is Bill Gates confirming you issue of shares, that will get you another million dollars in the bank.
gz, Apr 23 2001

       I use a pager for work but never thought about the fake uses for them, next time I'm in the pub and another damn rose-seller comes round AGAIN, i'll try danrue's suggestion.
Danrue: of course this could back-fire and cause the person who you're trying to get away from to be so impressed by your importance that they won't leave you the hell alone ever again.
Little_Crow, Apr 23 2001

       ... in which case you admit to it being fake. problem solved!
absterge, Apr 23 2001

       two thirds of thew uk population have a real mobile phone, isnt that enough?
edski, Apr 23 2001

       In 1993 or so I used to deal with a technobraggart salesman who had a laptop, cellphone and high-pitched pager. We were amongst a group that charted a small bus to go to a convention... I had the terrible misfortune of sitting behind him... I took off my hearing aid several times during the roadtrip and put it down around his waist level and flipped it on and off in rapid succession--imitating his pager. Since we were in front of the bus, the entire busload knew I was screwing with his mind. By the time we got there, he was frantic as to why he wasn't getting any readout... He'd been calling several people on his cell, etc.. I informed him once we arrived at convention, entire busload gave him the raised eyebrow to cut him short... The moral of the story, so to speak was... He never wasted our time - whether collectively or individually - with bragging again.
thumbwax, Apr 24 2001

       If you're really important, you dont have to carry the phone or beeper. The pleebs are all running around with them while you're at the club.
wasraw, Apr 24 2001

       Well, you could always use a fake mobile phone to disguise an argument with yourself (or with the voices, or whatever else makes people look at you funny when you talk earnestly to somebody who isn't there). How do we know that a lot of people aren't doing that anyway? Sometimes I watch people gabbing away on their cell phones at the airport -- they look like they're somewhere else, having left their bodies behind -- and I try to imagine the elaborate delusional systems they could be camouflaging...
whatsbruin, Sep 04 2001

       The actually important people -- those who aren't 24-hour servants of someone else -- don't carry cell phones.
horripilation, Nov 11 2002

       ...as reported in today's Guardian
hippo, Nov 11 2002

       Like me - I don't have one. That's made my day.
PeterSilly, Nov 11 2002

       I just buy candy cell phones and paint them black, so I can pretend to take a call to stop talking to someone and reward myself at the same time.
notmarkflynn, Dec 20 2005


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