Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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hats for houses

keep your house warm and make a fashion statement with a hat for your house.
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houses are traditionally insulated from the inside unlike our heads which are insulated on the outside with hats.

these hats would obviously come in all different shapes and sizes and colours and patterns. they would need to be very, very heavy so that they were not disturbed by the wind and homeowners in places susceptible to hurricanes might wish to pass on them altogether. they would have a system of channels and gutters, hidden very subtly amongst the patterns and folds of fake cloth material, for rain dispersal. leaves might be a problem in autumn, most would just blow away but hey its work for someone and if you live anywhere near a British mainline trainline BR might be very glad of these leaf traps, but that is another story.

I can quite picture Buckingham Palace with a ginormous flat cap in the style of Andy Capp, I will have to search for a link for our non-UK people and my own modest little rabbit hutch would look quaint with a bright red French beret set at a jaunty angle.

po, Jan 16 2003

Andy Capp http://www.toonvill...nville.com&fnum=234
[po]

a solution for leaves on the line http://physicsweb.o...icle/world/15/5/3/1 [po, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

a solution for leaves on the line http://physicsweb.o...icle/world/15/5/3/1
[po, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004]

oh dear, MFD in 1998 http://www.goodbyem...m/jun98/smythe.html
[po, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

[link]






       Excellent. Slates have always seemed an incredibly poor roofing material to me, being as they blow off, fall off, etc, and the alternatives (tar, glass) have their own limitations.   

       But a nice bowler hat (US: Derby) would let the rain run off, and its brim would be better than a gutter.
kropotkin, Jan 16 2003
  

       Andy Capp was featured in US papers for years. Don’t know why it isn’t anymore.
Shz, Jan 16 2003
  

       [po] do you think a kangaroo on top of my little house would be good ? the pouch could collect rain,when it does rain,or a fictional corked hat to get rid of the giant flies?   

       no bones with ya.
skinflaps, Jan 16 2003
  

       Wasn’t me [po], but I’ll tell you why I gave you a croissant… When I go on vacation, I usually go camping and I have a large tarp that I throw over my tent and stake into the ground which I named “the hurricane shield”. I can picture a house-sized version.
Shz, Jan 16 2003
  

       For authenticity, I guess that the Film Noir House would need to have its snap brim fedora rakishly pulled down low over the upper story windows. Do you want to add an Alan Ladd Trenchcoat with upturned collar and sash belt for extra insulation and protection from the damp?
jurist, Jan 17 2003
  

       I envision something more on the lines of a knitted bobble hat with holes for the doors and windows, essentially a tea-cosy (Teapot cover) for a house.
8th of 7, Jan 17 2003
  

       I think I remember once being taught that the rate of crime and vandalism in flat-roofed high-rise flats (US: apartment blocks) dropped when pointy roofs were plonked on top. This was, as I recall, related to notions of pride your home (for anecdotal evidence, see the now pointy-roofed high-rise housing schemes in Greenock, Scotland). I'll freely admit that I'm not sure why this should be. I am sure, however, that if houses had hats, then the level of dweller pride in their homes would increase, possibly by an exponential rate, thus making the world less crime-ridden and generally happier place. So, croissant.   

       [That said, I may have dreamed the whole thing after a night on the cheese but that doesn't really matter because the notion of houses wearing hats is, even without the crime reducing advantage, terrific. So croissant.]
my face your, Jan 17 2003
  

       Next you'll be suggesting bonnets for cars.
waugsqueke, Jan 17 2003
  

       [waugs] now you are just being silly.
po, Jan 17 2003
  

       Bad guys could put ski masks over their hideouts.
Size_Mick, Dec 08 2003
  

       Sorry, every time I saw a hat on a house I would assume that the house must be completely bald.
phundug, Dec 08 2003
  
      
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