Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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live tiger (keeps you running)

giving you something to run for
  (+6, -4)
(+6, -4)
  [vote for,

A live, hungry tiger is fitted with a shock collar so that if it gets within 10 feet of you it is shocked. Hopefully this would lead to artful stalking and much running and exercise (of course you and tiger are in a large park-like enclosure and you don't know about the shock collar)

I often think about tigers and other things chasing me when lack motivation on my morning runs. It works!


You would sign up for a weight loss program sign a bunch of wavers then discover the awful truth.

futurebird, Feb 17 2001


       Would you sign up for the tiger chase voluntarily, or would someone who takes an interest in your fitness sign you up for this hair-raising experience?   

       I'm not sure a shock collar would suffice. Rather, I can't imagine it would.   

       And what of the poor tiger? How conflicted it would be.
egnor, Feb 17 2001

       I'd be interested in hearing StarChaser's take on this.
beauxeault, Feb 17 2001

       It never fails to amaze me the extremes people (mostly women) will go to...to lose weight. Instead of this, you could get up at 6am, bring horses in from pasture, feed horses, take horses back out to pasture, clean and bed 22 stalls, (check the Halfbakery), ride six horses, bring the horses back in from pasture, feed them and take them back out to pasture, run after dogs, (check the Halfbakery) pitch some hay bales onto a wagon, unload them back at the barn and stack them, give two riding lessons (walking around the indoor for 2 hours as you instruct)....and remember at 11 pm that you haven't eaten today and go grab some carrot sticks and another Mountain Dew while you read the day's posts on the Halfbakery....
Susen, Feb 17 2001

       Carrot sticks and a Mountain Dew? There's something wrong about that. Carrot sticks go with wheatgrass juice; Mountain Dew goes with a cheeseburger; the two don't mix...
egnor, Feb 17 2001

       Well, to be fair, every three days I make it a point to eat a huge, well-balanced meal and I do take my vitamins daily.... lack of eating for me is generally due to lack of time. Tonight I have an awards banquet to go to....prime rib....yummmmm.... BTW, Moutain Dew is the nectar of the gods and goes with everything!
Susen, Feb 17 2001

       Who says you have to do this to get thin? Why not just for the fun of it? (that the #1 reason I run)
futurebird, Feb 17 2001

       that's the notion that I had, zippyanna. You strap in for a truly horrifying 30 or 40 minutes, during which your holodeck-weight-loss program assaults you with all manner of life-or-death, fight-or-flight situations. The adrenalin alone would kick your metabolism, not to mention the screaming/running in abject terror or the duking it out with a ferocious jungle beast.   

       (oh, btw, Mountain Dew rules! I suspect there is something very particularly addictive about Diet Pepsi and Mountain Dew. They both seem to have these diehard cult followings...)
absterge, Feb 18 2001

       I agree heartily with the general sentiment towards Mountain Dew. I think it has become even more appealing since they started doing those extreme sports satires (and Sprite has stopped doing parodies.)
nick_n_uit, Feb 18 2001

       Would be better to put the shocker on the runner, not the runnee, and use tamer tigers. And if the occasional person gets eaten, well, it'll just make the others work harder. After all, there's six billion humans, and only four thousand or so of us...   

       StarChaser Tyger
StarChaser, Feb 18 2001

       I think I'd rather get fat, but thanks for the idea.
DrBob, Feb 19 2001

       I loved that story! We do everything out of fear fundamentally. I mean I'm posting this out of fear, but I don't feel like breaking that down just now . . .
futurebird, Feb 19 2001

       waugsqueke, why would anyone run when it doesn't accomplish anything productive? Paying to "exercise" (such as at a health club) or exercising for fun has always been a mystery to me. I guess because my days are so physically demanding that I just can't imagine doing this on my free time (free time is for reading books and playing on-line). Our ancestors didn't have to pay to exercise or even need to exercise in general because their work was exercise. I personally am the same height and weight (5'6" 108 lbs.) that I was in 9th grade. That's over 20 years ago. I can't ever imagine having to go on a diet or force myself to exercise. The problem is that ours is a very lazy culture. But, if someone is going to exercise, it is a shame to expend all of that energy without actually accomplishing anything. I guess because I can't imagine having extra energy to waste, that it is just amazing to me that people HAVE extra energy to waste.
Susen, Feb 19 2001

       If I ever wanted to move that fast I'd step off a high cliff instead of being chased by a tiger. That way, I need only exert minimal effort. I'm even energy efficient when it comes to exercise.
tierrie, Feb 19 2001


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