Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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A Million Miles/Kilometres Away...

Well, not really a million miles...
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(+3, -2)
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I recently found out from an aunt that you have to take possums about 30km away, as otherwise, they find their ways back, and for many people this wastes time and money, time for driving the little buggers away, and money for the petrol used driving it as far away as possible.

My proposal is for a service, endorsed by the local public transportation service for people, for a small amount of money, to pay for the little rascals to be taken away to somewhere far, far away. These would be operated on a weekly basis (probably round the weekends, where people are most likely to catch them and try and humanely dispose of them.), and they would be set upon the roofs in a specially made fixture on top of either a non - double - decker bus or a train, so as nobody else will notice them.

All the trains/ buses will go in different directions, and will be dropped off by animal control specialists where they won't cause any more trouble.

I suppose this could also work with other animals too.

froglet, May 29 2005

US possum. http://www.opossumsocietyus.org/
? [Zimmy, May 31 2005]

Australian Possum http://www.hotkey.n...errelink/Possum.htm
I can't believe the amount of cookbooks I came across finding these two links. [Zimmy, May 31 2005]


       Not to mention certain relatives and, in extreme cases, children.
bristolz, May 29 2005

       Now there's an entertaining thought...
froglet, May 29 2005

       Don't you have coyotes?
mensmaximus, May 29 2005

       do possums love you that much?   

       have you tried lion dung?
po, May 29 2005

       Burnt possum testes are supposed to do the trick too.
Texticle, May 29 2005

Basepair, May 29 2005

       So there's hope if I put up "Missing" signs with my possum's picture?
reensure, May 29 2005

       One wonders how this distance was arrived at. Please tell me it was determined by a bunch of Wodehouse aunts in a Monty Python sketch.   

       In Seattle they captured some annoying sea lions and trucked them across the Olympic Peninsula. The sea lions swam around, and almost beat the truck back.   

       The picture of the sea lions galumphing across the sand toward the waves was the best newspaper photo I have ever seen.
baconbrain, May 30 2005

       Also, one must consider the fact that my house may be around 30km away from your house. therefore all your vermin gets unceremoniously placed in my front yard, at which point I have to deal with it. Being that my feelings for possum aren't nearly as passionate as yours, I would probably try some form of "Possapault" (thanks Basepair) or similar cannon to launch said possum about 30km in your direction.
Ponticad, May 30 2005

       Possapult... Now there's an idea... But would it be legal if you put the possum, in a plastic bag (so it can't get away) on a catapult and it flew about 300metres, would it be illegal, or could it be made to look like an accident..?
froglet, May 30 2005

       What is the purpose of the opossum relocation? why can't you leave them where they are?
waugsqueke, May 30 2005

       Probably coz they're pests to local residents and probably they could become dangers to themselves (eg - there was a possum or some animal along those lines which died in the roof of our house, killed itself by nibbling at some wires in the top. We didn't find out for a few weeks, and then it started to get even hotter, and the smell was absolutely medieval.)
froglet, May 30 2005

       ...why do you have to take possums away in the first place?
5th Earth, May 31 2005

       So, you trap it, let it go 50 meters away, immediately retrap it, move another 50...
RayfordSteele, May 31 2005

       Now if they were cross bred with lemmings...   

       Funny thing about possums [UnaBubba]. Just last night I & friends were talking about how different the Aussie possum's looks are from the US possum. I'll see if I can find links & we might wonder if the difference in appearance in the animals results in different treatment.
Zimmy, May 31 2005

       [UnaBubba], Part of the conversation I neglected to mention, My Best friends for 15 years are moving to Sydney. They are taking their pets (Including a Labrador). The Lab apparently consideres US possums as its mortal enemy & will kill any it can get to. (a bit to the owner's chagrin) If they had a little possum painted on "Mavis's" food bowl, they reckon there would be more than a dozen of them. (The last part about marking the bowl was my oddity of discription, not theirs).
Zimmy, May 31 2005

       //I'm glad I don't live in Tasmania, where they are BIG, like 8 - 11 kg.// Same here, I kinda feel sorry for the kid in my brothers year who moved there. He said one of the little sods died right above the spot where his head lies on his pillow...
froglet, May 31 2005

       Does it say anything that my initial reaction to this was also "maybe a catapult".   

       \\could it be made to look like an accident..?\\Aim for a road.
hidden truths, Jun 01 2005

       yeah around here in Seattle i see a good amount of roadkilled possums. At this rate, natural selection (or rather manmade selection? generic selection?) should kill off our local breed of possums within a few years. No need for relocation
CombatChuck, Jun 01 2005

       P.S. croissant just cuz these annotations gave me some good laughs. Hehe possapault
CombatChuck, Jun 01 2005


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