Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
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A slightly early farewell

Indelibly [marked-for-expiry]
  [vote for,

My dear fellow Halfbakers, I find myself in a tricky situation, socially speaking. Bear with me.

(I don't mean there's a bear with me - that would indeed be tricky.)

A couple of weeks ago, I got a diagnosis of stage IV lung cancer (stage V being cremation). Clearly, they were serious when they said smoking can damage your health. Being a geek and an optimist, I'd been counting on science and luck to ensure that I was one of the 2% of people who live for 5 years post-diagnosis.

Unfortunately, to paraphrase emperor Hirohito, there have been developments not entirely in my favour. My kidneys are somewhat buggered, and I've got blood clots on my one remaining "good" lung. Those factors mean that any form of treatment for the cancer itself would probably shorten rather than lengthen my life. (I know, I'm rambling, but bear with me a little longer.)

Upshot of all this is that, barring an almost-literal miracle, I'll be around for an unknown time between a week and a very few months. If it's "a very few months", then clearly this posting is embarrassingly premature. But if it's a week, I don't want to miss my chance to say goodbye.

So, I'll say goodbye now and then probably hang around for a while.

I've spent more time here, by far, than anywhere else online. In fact, I've spent more time here than I've spent with any one person outside of my immediate family over the last decade-and-a-bit. (The observant amongst you may be aware that I was here under a different guise even before then.) Although I've never met any of you physically, I've always considered this place (and, by extension, all of you) part of my "home". So, thanks to all of you and, of course, to [jutta] herself for building this asylum.

I've had various spats and tiffs with some of you over the years, I know. My apologies - life is too short for spats and tiffs.

I think that's about all I wanted to say for now. As mentioned, I will probably be around for 1-to-12 weeks or so (which will be embarrassing), but I might leave unexpectedly before then. If so, keep calm and carry on halfbaking.

MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 07 2020

bombs in the Pacific Kiritimaticentrifugomobile
who could resist? [DenholmRicshaw, Feb 07 2020]

Cryonics https://qz.com/8835...ney-to-immortality/
[Voice, Feb 08 2020]

Principles of cryopreservation https://www.ncbi.nl...gov/pubmed/18080461
[Voice, Feb 08 2020]

Cryonics Institute https://www.cryonics.org/
[Voice, Feb 08 2020]

Immune discovery 'may treat all cancer' https://www.bbc.com/news/health-51182451
Wish there was time for you to try this [xaviergisz, Feb 08 2020]

'don't go' https://www.youtube...watch?v=2FZNPxmTB4o
not sure if this is for [bliss] or [8th] [Skewed, Feb 09 2020]

High Hopes, Doris Day https://www.youtube...watch?v=Xlti6Ydh1-k
Marginally inspiring. [DrBob, Feb 09 2020]

Doctor Paul H. Dear interviewed by Professor Heinz Wolff https://www.youtube...watch?v=Dp4SkgJ2RSI
For proper, real inspiration. [DrBob, Feb 09 2020]

CRISPR and cancer https://www.healthl...d-still-kill-cancer
A small matter of timing would be the problem. [RayfordSteele, Feb 09 2020]

Afterlife blockchain Afterlife_20blockchain
Not any sort of an attempt at humour. [8th of 7, Feb 09 2020]

'Hail Mary' move? https://wholehealthmedicineinstitute.com/
'Health Outliers' with Lissa Rankin MD and Jeffery Rediger MD [Sgt Teacup, Feb 09 2020]

One of my all time favs Toroidal_20croissant
Fantasy Croissant [blissmiss, Feb 10 2020]

Non-small-cell lung carcinoma https://en.wikipedi...cell_lung_carcinoma
According to the MWI every person who hears about [MaxwellBuchanan]'s disease come up with a cure and his life is saved. Wikipedia seems like one place to start, although the thoughful person might research curing his "atypical" cancer features first. [beanangel, Feb 11 2020]

spare parts for stunted babies' lungs https://www.ncbi.nl...rticles/PMC2876978/
- under development as of 2011 [pertinax, Feb 11 2020]

S'town https://stownpodcast.org/
totally brilliant in every way [xenzag, Feb 11 2020]

The healers assemble. https://www.google....mgrc=hRpWTjfm3nM7wM
[pertinax, Feb 11 2020]

... or a whole spare lung https://journals.lw...a_Compliant.20.aspx
"Fourteen Day In Vivo Testing of a Compliant Thoracic Artificial Lung" [pertinax, Feb 11 2020]

(?) ... or there's this ... http://www.picsngig...g-extension-crobar/
[pertinax, Feb 11 2020]

Possible therapy Kevlar_20massage_20vest
[whatrock, Feb 11 2020]

Breathe https://www.myvideo.ge/v/2769367
Trygve Seim [xenzag, Feb 13 2020]

Always look on the bright side https://www.youtube...watch?v=-ECUtkv2qV8
[Voice, Feb 13 2020]

'small card' https://drinksfeed....rinks-in-the-world/
[Skewed, Feb 14 2020]

Most Expensive Drinks in the World https://vocal.media...drinks-in-the-world
[Voice, Feb 14 2020]

p53 drugs https://www.cancer....ontains=false&q=p53
It's better than peeing no drugs [4and20, Feb 14 2020]

apropos [DrBob]'s remarks https://www.youtube...watch?v=gGkKFick8E8
[pertinax, Feb 14 2020]

Anthony Hopkins is the new Pope https://en.wikipedi.../wiki/The_Two_Popes
He will replace bird cardinals, for a price [blissmiss, Feb 14 2020]

The history of [Max] & [Bp] https://www.halfbak...f_20MaxwellBuchanan
[hippo, Feb 14 2020]

Apropos [4and20]'s anno. https://xkcd.com/938/
[pertinax, Feb 15 2020]

Ketogenic diet and cancer https://www.ncbi.nl...rticles/PMC6375425/
Hey, just something to read, not necessarily do. [doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2020]

The Survivor monologues https://nymag.com/n...r/32123/index6.html
Rose Tisnado [xenzag, Feb 17 2020]

Sister-in-Law https://www.med.unc.../natasha-snider-phd
[RayfordSteele, Feb 18 2020]

A journal article about senolytics that mention one, navitoclax that works on lung fibroblasts https://www.ncbi.nl...rticles/PMC5641223/
[beanangel, Feb 19 2020]

Sounds medical, possibly commercial https://www.targete...nsclc-drilon-case-1
Targetted testing of stage 4 lung cancer 2 case study videos [4and20, Feb 19 2020]

1 complete recovery https://www.ncbi.nl...rticles/PMC3764732/
Time to see India [4and20, Feb 20 2020]

Anticancer P53 gene turned back on in [MB]'s exact kind of cancer https://www.pnas.org/content/100/23/13303
This 9 met peptide can be synthesized cheaply online if you can get the sequence [beanangel, Feb 20 2020]

How to get that chili to Max. Grandma_27s_20Chick...round_20The_20Globe
[doctorremulac3, Feb 20 2020]

IARC TP53 database http://p53.iarc.fr/
all the hellz there is to report on the most common oncogene [reensure, Feb 22 2020]

Ron's Liquor https://en.wikipedi...alk%3APitcher_plant
Ron is the keeper of our monkey sanctuary; and, he swears by drinking from pitcher plants because "Apes do it and they don't get cancer" [reensure, Feb 24 2020]

Max's oncologist addressing the staff to target the cancer. https://www.youtube...watch?v=QB0mGGTID6M
[doctorremulac3, Feb 24 2020]

Max's chemo vs the cancer. https://www.youtube...watch?v=gfpllwsw1pQ
Chemo's the Americans, cancer is the Nazis. [doctorremulac3, Feb 24 2020]

Where are they coming from!? https://www.ncbi.nl...rticles/PMC4833664/
The chondriome is doubling. (mitochondrial dna polymerase gamma). If she keeps building trying to warp under this pressure the coils will never stand the strain! [reensure, Feb 25 2020]

COLLABORATIVE EDITING: "Strategies for Saving Max" https://dynalist.io...dnRrgnHUKTY8_y7n5IG
Let's try collaborative editing? (it's autosaving, anonymously editable) [Mindey, Feb 25 2020]

Antiangiogenic therapies make sense, in longer term. https://youtu.be/B9bDZ5-zPtY?t=615
Resveratrol inhibits angiogenesis by 60%... "What we eat, is really, our chemotherapy 3 times a day..." [Mindey, Feb 26 2020]

Evolutionary approach to cancer treatment. https://stm.science...24/tab-figures-data
[Mindey, Mar 02 2020]

[Vernon] "Ordinary things, deadly-when-concentrated" Cancer_20Treatment
"Take it with a grain of salt." [Mindey, Mar 04 2020]

Just give it a bath https://jewishbusin...Ar2NObkJ4ESE3LOw6dE
Washing tumors off of a lung, and then replacing. [blissmiss, Mar 06 2020]

Marching Up & Down the Square https://www.youtube...watch?v=ucgU2DJlBiw
from 'Monty Python's The Meaning of Life'. [DrBob, Mar 08 2020]

metformin at 29 cents a pill, in mice it reduces cognitive impariment from cisplatin and is a longevity drug https://1001pills.com/search.htm?q=M
[beanangel, Mar 10 2020]

Time in days between Max annotations on this page. https://wiki.mindey...f9c93b4c2c3dc5b.png
Max, do you hear us? [Mindey, Mar 12 2020]

(?) Infinity.Family: A hint from MB implying, go link my ideas, by all means. https://infinity.fa...al-heart#1584243315
Also, in his site company site, he's: "Understanding the genome is not enough It's time to do something about it." [Mindey, Mar 15 2020]

(?) GNU Terry Pratchett http://www.gnuterrypratchett.com/
An explanation of "Living in the Overhead" [8th of 7, Mar 26 2020]

obituary https://www2.mrc-lm...aul-dear-1962-2020/
paul dear [xenzag, Mar 29 2020]

[fishty] I'm not sure you're aware of the palpable pride... Marked-for-greatness
[bs0u0155, Mar 30 2020]

The Fifth Risk https://en.wikipedi...wiki/The_Fifth_Risk
All about why the current administration was so ill-prepared from the beginning [RayfordSteele, Apr 06 2020]

(?) Buchanans' chunky cut marmalade! https://twitter.com...38259037798400?s=20
[Skewed, May 21 2020]

A healthy addition to breakfast. http://en.buchananswhisky.com/
[whatrock, May 22 2020]

JustGiving link https://www.justgiv...0c8a631db48834ebc4b
[hippo, Feb 21 2021]

LinkedIn link (Denise Dear) https://linkedin.co...ise-dear/45/76b/599
[hippo, Feb 21 2021]


       <Shocked silence/>
8th of 7, Feb 07 2020

       Shocked and very sorry to hear this [Max]. I have always enjoyed the wit and inventiveness you've bought to the Halfbakery. You will be greatly missed here.
hippo, Feb 07 2020

       Just to add a bit of ironic pathos:   

       Most of the recent and best cancer therapeutics are based on humanized antibodies. In order for these to work, the patient needs to be (a) reasonably fit and (b) to have any one of several mutations that give the cancer an 'Achilles' heel'.   

       Not only am I not 'reasonably fit', but my cancer also lacks every one of those genetic Achilles' heels.   

       Now for the kicker. About 35-odd years ago, a humble post- graduate starting out on his scientific career and working as a summer student/lab-tech for a brilliant scientist, built the very first synthetic gene for the very first humanized antibody. And guess who that humble (OK, probably not that humble) post-grad was? Yep.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 07 2020

       Fuck me, and fuck cancer! [MB] this is honestly devastating.
theircompetitor, Feb 07 2020

       WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?   

       I'm sorry, that's vulgar. It's my way of covering pain.
doctorremulac3, Feb 07 2020

       Vulgarify away, [doc], you have my complete permission.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 07 2020

       Thank you brother. For everything.
doctorremulac3, Feb 07 2020

       So my desire to volunteer to donate my body to Max's experimental science project for when he starts to try bold and crazy treatment things isn't going to time out well.   

       Bugger all. This was a rather extremely silly way to do Brexit.
RayfordSteele, Feb 07 2020

       a good friend who is in the medical field has a pretty bitter expression, acknowledging the maddeningly slow pace of progress, and the never ending set of stories that talks about hope.   

       All the Mice Are Cured.   

       May this be the last time I get to use it this way...
theircompetitor, Feb 07 2020

       oh, Max.
Loris, Feb 07 2020

       Bugger and bollocks. I'm going to the pub now.
DenholmRicshaw, Feb 07 2020

       There's something about the will we need to all discuss: who inherits the misfortune of being Sturton's emergency contact?
RayfordSteele, Feb 07 2020

       I volunteered [8th] for that.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 07 2020

       We fear that will devolve on us.   

       We understand that, should the unthinkable happen, the Honour Party at Rentisham's are preparing the protocol for flying their trousers at half-mast for the appropriate period.
8th of 7, Feb 07 2020

       What [DenholmRicshaw] said. I would wish you godspeed, but neither of us believe in God, and anyway according to the bible one isn't supposed to do that. I'll personally re-read your ideas (please don't delete them) and drink quite a few in your honor.
Voice, Feb 07 2020

       Who's going to entertain me now?! That's as close as the Sgt gets to 'sorry for (y)our loss'.   

       Half-expected to see [2fries] chime in with a suitably homeopathic and/or nutbar suggestion. Failing that, I propose an iteration of S.Hawking's 'future party' to dis/prove prognostication and/or time travel:   

       Max, whenhow your animating electrons reach 'the other side' (Tesla might've found a way), send us a message. How, you ask? Amongst us, we should be able to devise a suitable test. Begin now.   

       And I agree with [RayfordSteele]: silly way to 'Brexit'.
Sgt Teacup, Feb 07 2020

       Back from the pub...   

       [Basepair]... it was you...   

       [...no - it's 42 seconds...] my favourite
DenholmRicshaw, Feb 07 2020

       // Who's going to entertain me now?! //   

       Freddie Mercury ?   

       Robbie Williams ?   

       Mr. Sloane ... ?
8th of 7, Feb 07 2020

       "Help! Our planet is run by stupid people!" — wagster, Jul 03 2005   

       ...nuff said...
DenholmRicshaw, Feb 07 2020

       I'll always fondly remember the time I sent you a broken wristwatch in the post.
pocmloc, Feb 07 2020

       Thank you for letting us know.
pertinax, Feb 08 2020

       Can we cryogenically freeze him? Or maybe just some of his DNA? There's likely a Chinese facility somewhere where experimental cloning is likely to happen for the right price...   

       You could also send a small bit up on Space-X if you know the right folks, (and don't mention 8th or Sturton or his sex-toy-on -the-ISS-incident...)
RayfordSteele, Feb 08 2020

       . [pertinax]   

       Thank you for the grounding guidance, there wil be a irreplaceble gap for sure.   

       And, as [Sgt Teacup] said, try to signal if you make the jump through space, time and form. If you make into the accessible past, name some streets.
wjt, Feb 08 2020

       I'll toss some money into the hat for cryo-preserving his head. In my opinion the vitriol people express for cryonics is born of sour grapes.
Voice, Feb 08 2020

       Bollox. I'm actually upset to the point of sending a private message.
xenzag, Feb 08 2020

       //the vitriol people express for cryonics is born of sour grapes//   

       That doesn't sound right; vitriol is sulphuric acid, whereas sour grapes would get you acetic acid, I think.   

       On the other hand, if you mixed some sulphite-based preservatives into the whine, then you might be on to something.
pertinax, Feb 08 2020

       If the cryopreservation doesn't work, there's always pickling.
RayfordSteele, Feb 08 2020

       Well shit. I've been playing my cards in a way that had a chance of us actually meeting face to face some day if you cared to.   

       You are one of my favorite teachers.
Damnit! Just let the big guy keep the five bucks already.

       Hey, [2fries], thanks. We've had our run-ins, and I've been pig-headed with the best of them. You are gracious.   

       (In the unlikely event that something miraculous happens and I'm around for more than 12 weeks, I of course reserve the right to resume pig-headedness.)
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 08 2020

       This is truly terrible. I hope your discomfort is very mild in the upcoming weeks.   

       It is no consolation, but I have been sitting on a notebook of halfbakery ideas I will try to put up two a week to keep the place lively should you be absent.   

       And, to put it mildly, you *shouldn't* be absent.   

       What kind of cancer is it so we can all have a go at curing it?
beanangel, Feb 08 2020

       //What kind of cancer is it // It's non-small-cell lung adenocarcinoma, which is the commonest type. However, it's behaving "atypically" - causing all kinds of problems which it shouldn't normally do. It's those problems that make me too weak to survive any treatment designed to kill the cancer cells. That includes both established therapeutics and the latest things like Car-T (which is still in early stages for solid tumours anyway), and also any new targetted drugs. Anything that works will cause a lot of cell death amongst the cancer cells (and, in most cases, collateral damage in healthy cells), and the cell debris and inflammation would kill me in my current state.   

       My cancer behaving atypically is just bloody typical.   

       There is a small window of possibility - if they can correct the other problems (kidneys and blood clots), I might improve enough to risk actual treatment.   

       It's basically a science problem, so at least it's an interesting way to go!   

       Oh, and yes, my discomfort at present is mild, thanks. I'm stuck in hospital, but not in any pain. My o2 sats are down to about 82% without supplemental oxygen (90 with), but that's only a problem if I do something reckless like walking. Other than that, I feel fine. (Actually, I Googled and someone at Everest's summit might be down to only 40%, which is awesome.)
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 08 2020

       //<Shocked silence/>//   



       I am going to miss your input more than you might realise :(
Skewed, Feb 08 2020

       Um. lots of aspirin?
Voice, Feb 08 2020

       Oddly, I was on aspirin plus another thinner until my coronary angiogram came back annoyingly clear. They then took me off both thinners, and I've turned into black pudding. Bit of a bugger indeed.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 08 2020

       Have you considered trying homoeopathy?
pocmloc, Feb 08 2020

       Well this is just no goddammed good at all.
tatterdemalion, Feb 08 2020

       We agree. It's deeply unsatisfactory; there must be some individual or corporate entity who can be sued.   

       // Have you considered trying homoeopathy? //   

       Again ? Our understanding is that it had already been tried, and convicted of fraud, deception, and obtaining money under false pretences.
8th of 7, Feb 08 2020

       //fraud, deception, and obtaining money under false pretences//   

       And what's wrong with any of those things?
pocmloc, Feb 08 2020

       If you're a government, nothing at all- just Standard Operating Procedure...
8th of 7, Feb 08 2020

       //Have you considered trying homoeopathy?// No, I'm saving the big guns until things get more serious.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 08 2020

       Lol Ok, THAT’S funny.
doctorremulac3, Feb 08 2020

       I love you, don't go.
blissmiss, Feb 09 2020

       Profanity cannot express... well, it can, just not near enough.   

       I find myself torn between asking if I can have your stuff, andor querying the going rate for trebuchet rental. j/k... well, mostly.   

       Max, you've been one of the few inspirational people/avatars on the Internet, and have enriched my life. I like to consider you a friend, though we've never met. Sorely missed.
FlyingToaster, Feb 09 2020

       [Link] not sure if that's for [bliss] or [8th], either way I echo the sentiment.   

       This really isn't good enough you know. You've helped brighten many a dark day for me (not your purpose in life of course but know you have), pointless or not I'll be keeping my fingers crossed.   

       [Raises a glass]   

       Best of luck, I'll be checking in for news.
Skewed, Feb 09 2020

       Well, this is shit. I'll miss you.
calum, Feb 09 2020

       Well this all sounds a bit grim. You make a huge contribution to the 'bakery Max. It would be a bit of a shame for it to come to an end.
//I'd been counting on science and luck//
Sometimes, when science, luck & even hope fails you, just obstinancy & sheer, bloody-minded refusal to accept reality can get you through. Sometimes. It's the British way, you know!
And when mindless optimism in the face of grim facts is called for, there's always Doris Day to call on for inspiration (linky).

The very best of luck to you in the fight ahead sir & I look forward to many years of reading your grovelling apology for alarming everyone unneccessarily!
DrBob, Feb 09 2020

       How ya doin’ today Max?
doctorremulac3, Feb 09 2020

       I think it would be really helpful, if you felt like it, to give us a daily update on your status.   

       I want to know if you are in pain, so I could try and be funny, or if you were sad, I could sit silently with you for a moment and just be still.   

       I'm still not able to come to terms with this, not at all.
blissmiss, Feb 09 2020

       Yea brother, you feel like giving an update, we'd certainly like to know how you're doing. If you don't that's all good too. However you want to handle it.   

       But we are here for you.
doctorremulac3, Feb 09 2020

       OK - I'm happy to update. Just a little embarrassed to be hanging around like a fart in a phone-box.   

       So, I'm still stuck in hospital (9 days and counting this time). Kidney's are semi-knackered but they're not sure why: probably enlarged lymph nodes pressing on plumbing. Left lung is surrounded by this weird, atypical cancer which works like a straitjacket (so, not much air movement there). Right lung is fine but has large blood clots in the arteries, because the cancer is making my blood more clotty (this is fairly common, apparently), so it's not doing much. I'm on tons of low molecular-weight heparin to prevent any more clotting, and it's possible the existing clots will slowly resolve. In the meantime, I'm on a low oxygen feed (2l/min) and keeping my sats at around 90% (which is crap but perfectly survivable). I'm fine as long as I'm lying down, and can walk about 30 yards if I have to.   

       I'm also plumbed into various other tubes whose main purpose is to siphon off any residual dignity. But hey.   

       If it weren't for the kidneys and the tiny lung function, they could think about things like (a) possible surgery to remove the clots on the lung and more usefully (b) chemo/immunotherapy which would resolve a lot of the issues and get me back to good health for a while. And then (c) who knows what might be round the corner?   

       But, as it is, I'm in Catch 22 where I can only lie here and hope. In the meantime, it's actually very therapeutic to share the details, so thanks for asking.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 09 2020

       Well then, here's my "knock Knock" joke...hee hee, just kidding.   

       You know, I'm seeing room for hope. I didn't see that yesterday. Room for hope makes room for my prayers, and that's just what I'll do. The Universe may still have some plans for you, MB...let's just see how this goes then.
blissmiss, Feb 09 2020

       I just happened to log-in, which I very rarely do these days, and clicked on one item....this one. Oh boy, I truly hope that you get a miracle, and if not, you have as much comfort as possible. I'm not sure if I should log in again, if you are gonna be pulling these tricks.
Ling, Feb 09 2020

       Hey [blissy], thanks. I go through different phases in the course of one day. At the moment I'm in my unrealistically- hopeful phase, which is good.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 09 2020

       Max - I'm packing up and posting the two pieces of my work tomorrow. To where do you want them sent? Email me if you have an address preference, otherwise I will use your work place. They will come as two separate packages, neither being a large box.
xenzag, Feb 09 2020

       [xen] you are a marvel. Work address will get to me (I'm in the process of shutting down the company, but that'll take a while).
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 09 2020

       Ha. It's the least I can do.
xenzag, Feb 09 2020

       //I'm also plumbed into various other tubes whose main purpose is to siphon off any residual dignity. But hey.//   

       Made me smile again. Takes a special level of stoicism to keep your sense of humor while going through this shit. Respect.
doctorremulac3, Feb 09 2020

       Respect, and integrity, and substance and depth and a kind of courage that I know I don't possess.   

       (We could try a World get-well card as we did for FarmerJohn when he was given a really crummy diagnosis. He pulled out of it and was around to build a shit load more clocks.)
blissmiss, Feb 09 2020

       //courage// Courage would be if I had a choice. Not having a choice makes things easier, honestly.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 09 2020

       Courage is being the only one who knows you're afraid.
Voice, Feb 09 2020

       Any last requests, Paul? Anything at all? If ever there were a group of people to ask...   

       Regardless, you won't be forgotten.
phoenix, Feb 10 2020

       If there was no other way, at least we tried.   

       Thanks for one of the best of "best ofs ... " ; and, tip of the hat.
reensure, Feb 10 2020

       Well, this is a fine mess you find yourself in.
I'm sad that we never got to meet in person (me being on the other side of the planet...), as I feel you are on a similar wavelength to my brain. I will remember you always, and the knowledge and silliness you brought/bring to this mad place.
//Just a little embarrassed to be hanging around like a fart in a phone-box//
You have definitely earned the right to hang around here.
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 10 2020

       // I'm fine as long as I'm lying down, and can walk about 30 yards if I have to. //   

       I think we would all like to see you walk 30 yards while lying down. And miles further standing up.   

       [Max] this is very unsatisfactory and as you are the mentor of the halfbakery you are hereby forbidden to leave. Submit a proper request in triplicate two weeks in advance so that it can be summarily shot down. Besides, without you we would be left at the mercy of an unsupervised alien.   

       Please don't go.
whatrock, Feb 10 2020

       This is deep crap news. You are a legend, Sir and I can say no more.
gnomethang, Feb 10 2020

       I was SO sure we met, in a swanky London Venue a long (too long) while ago... Perhaps your posts were discussed?. Privilege and honour to have encountered you, here, in any event.
Is there anything we can do to help/support you or your nearest dearest at all, in any way?
Dub, Feb 10 2020

       It will be really sad to see you go. So sorry this is happening to you. You've been amazing. And hopefully you last longer if you can. Hugs to you always.   


       "left at the mercy of an unsupervised alien."   

       I'm still here and very supervised TYVM.
sartep, Feb 10 2020

       Just swinging by to say hello and goodbye. It was good to have known you, if only via this silly text box.
Worldgineer, Feb 10 2020


       [MB], I've always wanted to sample your intriguing centrifuge-filtered coffee and genuinely have, on opening tins of waxes, creams or polishes, for the last several years cast thoughts in your direction, wistfully wondering what it must be like to experience the phenolic thrill of popping-open a fresh new tin of Rentishams.   

       I'd genuinely also wondered on occasion what had ever happened to [Basepair] - that mystery seems now solved (if I've been paying attention) - and over the years, I've regretted never having got the chance to say goodbye to him, I guess that time is now too.   

       Goodbye Max, I really wish it could be au-revoir.   

       And to look for some positive spin for a moment, one (albeit slightly buggered) lung is plenty if you're taking it easy. If you've been offered the palliative drugs-menu, you've got the opportunity to enjoy developing an entirely new connoisseurship and, having a more clearly- defined future-bound than previously, you can now order pretty much anything online (drugs, exotic emollients, high-explosives) without fear of punitive repercussion.   

       Long may the embarrassing void between this page of goodbyes and fair-thee-well-wishes stretch into the coming months and years.
zen_tom, Feb 10 2020

       Oh, blimey, mate! This is truly awfuk news. xx
po, Feb 10 2020

       I... wow. No!   

       There's not a lot one can say that really gets to grips with this.   

       Pray. Please. I will.
david_scothern, Feb 10 2020

       //the unlikely event that something miraculous happens//   

       For what it's worth, there are some people 8 000 miles away praying for this event.
pertinax, Feb 10 2020

       Well, I'm now here for another day, apparently.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 10 2020

       Yay. That's pretty much what we all got too. We just don't know why yet. This is very personal, but I'm hoping you have family with you.   

       I know you have this family cheering you on, and that's a lot of loonies in one place, but hoping you have folks surrounding you in person, as well. Just tell me to mind my own if it's too personal to answer.
blissmiss, Feb 10 2020

       /hanging around/ Please, continue to do so.
david_scothern, Feb 10 2020

       //Well, I'm now here for another day, apparently.//   

       We're all in a bizarre Schrödinger box, in every Internet community, where we don't really know until the next annotation collapses the probability function. May your probability function beat the odds.
theircompetitor, Feb 10 2020


xandram, Feb 10 2020

       // very supervised TYVM. //   

       Verily, but the Borg behind you is not.
whatrock, Feb 10 2020

       and [Max]... if and when you get to the great beyond, please try to contact us. We will be here waiting for you! All my love and peace dear Sir xox
xandram, Feb 10 2020

       //Well, I'm now here for another day, apparently.//   

       Good, I'll be around too. (as far as I know)   

       For whatever it's worth, I think that along with mortality you do get a pretty good consolation prize of living on in a way via your children. To me at least, it makes taking that final curtain call a bit more palatable. What a great blessing you've been given. It's a sort of immortality in the form of pure love. Children are the cure for death.   

       And if you do contact me in the afterlife, please do so by sending me a winning lottery ticket or something, not tapping on my window during a thunderstorm in the middle of the night. Well, unless you think it would be funny, in which case go for it.
doctorremulac3, Feb 10 2020

       //you do get a pretty good consolation prize of living on in a way via your children// - and, more importantly, living on via your Halfbakery ideas (or is that what you meant by "children"?)
hippo, Feb 10 2020

doctorremulac3, Feb 10 2020

       I didn't know Paul Dear, PhD [MaxwellBuchanan] had children, that is wonderful news. Brightening the gene pool brightens my day. Thanks [MB].
beanangel, Feb 10 2020

       Well, this is an unpleasant shock. Still, I wasn't having a particularly good Monday anyhow so rest assured that there's no real damage done!   

       Important things first, time being of the essence and all. It's been a fucking pleasure mate. Thank you. For everything. I feel the same way as you about this place and you were responsible for an unreasonably large number of laughs, snorts and other enjoyable text- induced spasms. I don't know anyone else like you and I'm not looking forward to the noticeable lurch toward the dull that the world will take in your absence.   

       Now, it's a good job this isn't an idea, lung cancer is a WKTE and a terribly unoriginal way to go, dressing it up with a couple of bells and whistles isn't hiding that. Fortunately for me, I had lymphoma as a kid and as such I'm operating on the assumption that it's out of the way, like mumps. Either that or it really was mumps, and I was given a rather enthusiastically over-engineered treatment plan.   

       Perhaps you could use this opportunity to introduce some of the more senior professionals to the untapped medical applications of a really top-notch flenting wax? I hear Rentisham's is flamboyantly anti-microbial while conveying an enviable level of durability and lustre. Just keep it away from any plastics/MRI patients who are often a touch static-y. We don't need sources of ignition now those oxygen tubes have started leaking.
bs0u0155, Feb 11 2020

       [MB] according to the Many Worlds Interpretation of physics (MWI) some of you will live, and some of them will even come up with the idea that saves them. Of course, sometimes it will be [8th]'s idea so study up. Another thing you could do is come up with an affordable irrefutable test of the MWI. If they get it tested by 2030 you'll live to see that you just keep on living.
beanangel, Feb 11 2020

       This moment’s thoughts from wikipedia [link]   

       [MB] can they do lots of dialysis and still operate to remove the cancer?   

       If you have enough money to tell doctors what to do (usually this is a bad idea), Wikipedia says they don’t usually laser away cancers bigger than 5cm, perhaps if you can tell doctors what to do you could get lots of dialysis and tell them to laser away the cancer on the exterior of the lung as well as some internal to the lung.   

       In epigenetics, which you’ve previously mentioned, FEN1, MLH1, and MSH2 are all usually disregulated in NSCLC, there may be some epigenetic drugs that restore these to a favorable epigenetic profile, you could take those.   

       Keyhole limpet proteins (immunosensitizers) attached to blood clot components to immunize you against things blood clots are made of possibly fibrinogen could be a nonstandard new drug option. They have keyhole limpet proteins on alibaba.com   

       As to palliative care that won't fog your brain, phenibut, a GABA activator, is sometimes on ebay and immediately available online. It is a Nootropic that does make me think of more/better ideas and makes people relaxed and sociable. It also is a mild anaesthetic, and I always feel healthier when I am on it. As a data point, if I have a rash or scratch these goe from red back to white when I take phenibut. 2 grams is the usual dose but I am sure you have plans in moderation for your kidneys. The main point is it is a nootropic that makes you feel better and is a mild body anesthetic. Wikipedia says one dose lasts about 24 hours. It also makes falling asleep easier and the sleep more restful. It has downsides, It might reregulate your GABA receptors towards less enjoyable if you use it more than two times a week, and you shouldn't drive on it.
beanangel, Feb 11 2020

       Nice to see the HBrains swinging into action. Surgery is not an option due to the fact that it's quite a diffuse cancer and also in lymph nodes. Moreover, even if they can work around the kidney problem, I just don't have enough lung capacity at present - any inflammation (or infection) would take me down to zero, which is not really an option.   

       Re the genetic markers: there are a handful of mutations which, if present, can be targetted by some of the newer therapeutics (though, again, I'd need to be in better shape first). However, I have drawn a blank for all common and targettable mutations except for a p53 mutation (which is common, but doesn't give any clear therapeutic options).   

       And re epigenetic stuff, my cancer is low (almost zero) expression of PD-L1, which is the commonest immunotherapy target.   

       All in all, it does rather look as if this one has my name on it.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 11 2020

       Then trick it. Use an alias. Uhhh, John Wayne? Uh...Johnny Depp? Uh...Paul Simon? Maybe Dear Paul? I'm running out of ideas but you get the gest. Glad to see you today. Keep up your spirits. That is so good for the soul.
blissmiss, Feb 11 2020

       Thanks, [blissy]. I might use W.C. Fields' strategy: "On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia".   

       Still here today. I hate to admit this, but I was quite proud to have walked up a flight of stairs.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 11 2020

       A crack squad of therapeutic nanobots enters the body through the IV drip. They follow the venous blood flow to the heart. After a brief quarrel in the left atrium about how to read the map, two of them peel off down the left pulmonary artery, two more stay in the right lung and get down to business and three push on down the right pulmonary vein and, following an altercation with a suspicious T-cell, make their way to the kidneys. The last bot makes a wrong turn by the inferior vena cava, and comes out in Mornington Crescent.
pertinax, Feb 11 2020

       This inflammation you speak of, would that be, specifically, inflammation of the alveoli (preventing lung function)?
pertinax, Feb 11 2020

       //Then trick it. Use an alias.//   

       Maybe wear a pair of those glasses with the fake nose and eyebrows. If death comes to the door and says "Are you Paul?" say "Mmmnope. I'm Phil. Paul left with that nurse a couple of hours ago. Said he was feeling much better. I think he said he was going to Philadelphia, might be able to find him there."   

       As far as getting some physical accomplishments in like hitting those stairs, I think that's awesome! Stand up and fight until that final bell brother! I remember that song my dad would sing to me:   

       "Stand up and fight until you hear the bell. Stand toe to toe, trade blow for blow. Keep punching till you make your punches tell. Show that crowd what you know! Until you hear that final bell, stand up and fight like hell!"   

       We're all here in your corner rooting for you Max.
doctorremulac3, Feb 11 2020

       ... because if those alveoli are the most likely immediate point of failure, then the team in the link were, some years ago, working on a substrate for growing extra, implantable alveoli for premature babies. Now, I know we're not talking about a premature baby here, but, if implantable alveoli are a real thing ...
pertinax, Feb 11 2020

       I dream big.   

       Soon you will be skipping up those stairs tossing flowers behind you while singing your favorite dity, and playing the bagpipes. I can see it now. That's my inspirational vision to pray to. Why the hell not. I also like the fake mustache and eyebrows option, just to fuck with people.
blissmiss, Feb 11 2020

       Max - I've emailed you at your Mote address. I note an interest in watchmaking and recommend this podcast most highly as a great and interesting distraction. (link)
xenzag, Feb 11 2020

       //would that be, specifically, inflammation of the alveoli // The oncologist was talking about pneumonitis, which I think is a catchall for any type of lung inflammation.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 11 2020

       //tossing flowers behind you while singing your favorite dity, and playing the bagpipes//   

       But the bagpipes take two hands, what's he throwing flowers around with, or shouldn't I ask? ;)
Skewed, Feb 11 2020

       Next link: swap out one of your lungs for one of these new artificial ones. Give your own lung a good clean, then keep it on ice for a week or two while your body gets over the shock, then swap it back in. Repeat for the other lung. Then proceed to chemo the metastatic cancers in the knowledge that at least your lungs won't pack up while you're doing it.
pertinax, Feb 11 2020

       Knowing next to nothing about the ailment at hand and having waited while more experienced bakers spoke I would like to make a suggestion that somehow seems to make sense. Would hanging upside down for a period each day help? Fluid and gunk that has collected in the lungs would then be coaxed downhill and out the door. Granted this would not be a cure-all but may improve lung function, O2 levels and overall comfort. A pair of gravity booties and a modified Kevlar Massage Vest (link) might do the trick. You could claim that you'd always wanted to beat gravity and become an inch taller, and whatever accumulation that is coughed up is merely a by-product.
whatrock, Feb 11 2020

       //swap out one of your lungs for one of these new artificial ones// - why stop at the lung? what's wrong with the wired-up 'brain in a jar' solution? Haven't you seen Futurama?
hippo, Feb 11 2020

       Seems excessive to stay tied to a biological brain. A computer simulation seems the obvious solution. There are plenty of AIs that no-one really knows how they work or what they do internally. I'm sure a few of them would be interested. Problem is, how to attract their attention?
pocmloc, Feb 11 2020

       Been looking into head transplants. Although it's not feasible currently, there's no "brick wall" problem that would make it impossible at any time in the future. Much less complicated procedures with other body parts have been successful, rejection issues dealt with etc and it would certainly be worthy of continued research. Actually I should say "I don't see a brick wall impediment." If people get queasy about the Frankenstein factor tell them to not let a stupid old horror story determine the best direction for medical research in the future. We'd probably drop the bolts on the neck and the flat head.   

       Well, maybe just some very little bolts and a very slightly flat head. Hey, if my body gave out I'd want to do it. My first action after coming out of anesthesia would be to grab the surgeon's hand and say "Friend...good." Then we'd all have a good laugh.
doctorremulac3, Feb 11 2020

       //A computer simulation seems the obvious solution.//   

       There's an interesting philosophical problem with that. Suppose it were possible to scan my brain and then create a simulation that behaved exactly the same way. The original "I" is still left behind and still has to undergo death at some point. The fact that there's now an identical copy in silico might not be much consolation to the original me.   

       //head transplants// Count me in.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 11 2020

       OMG, pertinax, those lung extenders in your link are scary. Someone could accidentally trip on them and break their neck Then they would really be in trouble. Damn scary!!!
blissmiss, Feb 11 2020

       //not be much consolation to the original me// Well yes, but that's the original me's problem, not the new me's.
pocmloc, Feb 11 2020

       Actually, wouldn't the original me recognise the new me as an intrinsic and indivisible part of itself? Like how you don't consider your sense of hearing as a different thing or person to yourself. (OK not like that because your sense of hearing is not identical and complete. But you know what I mean (perhaps you don't, but I do (actually that might not even be true))). And so the shutting down of one of the two mes might not seem so traumatic after all?
pocmloc, Feb 11 2020

       My dearest Maxwell,   

       I would love to think this letter finds you well but seriously, me old china, you've made rather a mess of this, haven't you?   

       We tried to warn you that breathing the fumes from that bloody Flenting Wax was going to do you in but you chose not to listen.   

       Anyway, I've popped a box of heavily modified anti-cancer termites (they're a sort of uprated cousin of the ones your man, What's-His-Name, found in that filing cabinet in Borneo when he was trying to undiscover the Wallace Line) in the post for you. We found these ones eating the tumorous arse-end out of a beached whale on a remote island in the Arafura Sea, so they may or may not work. Worth a shot, in the circumstances.   

       As for getting them into the country, they're in a lead-lined box, clearly marked Rentisham's Farnarkling Curative, with a URGENT sticker on each of the twenty sides of the box. The Express Courier Wallaby in whose pouch we have sent them has clear instructions to act as coolly and as calmly as possible, so as not to arouse the suspicions of your local authorities. There's also a small flask of overproof Bundaberg Rum in there, if things get a bit too much.   

       With a bit of luck, now that Britain's Customs Department is in utter, fucking disarray after that Brexit nonsense, the whole ensemble should slip through without a hitch.   

       Now, here's the tricky bit, son. You have to coax the termites into climbing in through your nose in twos, between midnight and dawn. Not the very best plan, as you may have noticed, and you'll have to keep them out of the way of the nurses if you can because they might eat a few of them if you're not looking, but this may be the only chance you get to participate in a world-first trial to see if they work on a living subject.   

       I do hope they arrive in time, and that they don't tickle too much on the way in. If they do actually work, you'll be the first survivor on record.   

       All of the very best from all of us here in the antipodes, and if it doesn't go so well with these little fellers, or they get sidetracked by Customs, then we'll see you on the other side, hmm?   

       Cheers for now,   


       P.S. I do hope things go as well as possible for you, mate. Wishing you all of the best.
UnaBubba, Feb 11 2020

       [Ubie]! Blimey, mate, I'm honoured and it's good to hear from you. I'll let you know how I get on with the termites.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 11 2020

       Please do. I hope they arrive in time to make a difference.   

       So sorry to hear your news at this time... Or any time, to be honest.   

       I trust they're keeping you comfortable and I hope they don't stint on the good drugs.
UnaBubba, Feb 11 2020

       They are thanks. To be honest I'm in no physical discomfort at all at the moment unless I try something reckless like moving around. It'll work out somehow.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 11 2020

       I never imagined, when I first joined the HB, that I'd end up this age, so every day is a bit of a bonus.   

       I'm up early this morning (5:00am), and just had a cup of coffee with my eldest before he headed off to work.   

       He's 19 now. He was the inspiration for my username, as we had just the one baby at the time I joined.   

       Time flies, usually in a direction we didn't quite anticipate.
UnaBubba, Feb 11 2020

       Fine, make the old lady cry. You two...
blissmiss, Feb 11 2020

       Oh I don't know. The direction is of no surprise to anyone. The speed is more startling. For all of us.
david_scothern, Feb 11 2020

       The speed is (relatively) constant but the perception is
pocmloc, Feb 11 2020

       The sense of time speeding up as I get older suggests that in my youth I must have been travelling at near the speed of light and experiencing a relativistic time-dilation effect
hippo, Feb 11 2020

       It's not time dilation you have to worry about with age, it's the dreaded Lorentz-FitzGerald contraction! Ha
xenzag, Feb 11 2020

       Honestly, as time moves on, I find most things about me are expanding, rather than contracting. Most distressing.
UnaBubba, Feb 11 2020

       Ha. "This is the year of the expanding man" Steely Dan.
xenzag, Feb 11 2020

       Yeah, time flies when you're not paying attention...
I can't believe it's the middle of February already. I'm not sure where 2019 went, let alone January this year.
Keep up the good spirits, [MaxwellBuchanan].
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 11 2020

       // I find most things about me are expanding, rather than contracting// did you check the side-effects carefully, [UB] :)
theircompetitor, Feb 11 2020

       It said, on the packaging, [tc], "Your mileage may vary"   

       So I guess that's on me?
UnaBubba, Feb 11 2020

       // I find most things about me are expanding, rather than contracting// Oh, that's just things out of place; mind them and soon the house and mind will be less cluttered.
reensure, Feb 11 2020

       I have a theory that the perception of time going faster is driven by our mind's tendency over time to ignore the daily pattern noise of rituals and habits as automatic, time-consuming, but not terribly interesting or novel activities, like driving to work, coupled with an ever longer span of memory over which we self-identify and serves to inform us of who we are. I guess that brings up a question: when you're at the edge of something like death, does that perception of the acceleration of time still take place, or does the sheer boredom of hospitalization overcome it? 'The hours are too long, but the days are too short..'
RayfordSteele, Feb 12 2020

       You're an incredibly awesome person and it's been a pleasure and a privilege to get to see you in action.   

       Thank you.   

       And, yeah, fuck cancer.   

jutta, Feb 12 2020

       //head transplants//   

       Potentially still too much incompatible tissue to set off the old immune response, a full body brain transplant may be better.   

       Just let us know who's body (& face) you want & we'll instruct Sturton for you if you don't feel up to it yourself.
Skewed, Feb 12 2020

       All this contracting and expanding makes me think I've fallen Into The Looking Glass, as Alice would have said, maybe. (Just lead me to the mushrooms, and I'll be a happy girl.)
blissmiss, Feb 12 2020

       Yeah, what [blissy] said. Don't forget to stop and sniff the mushrooms, people.
UnaBubba, Feb 12 2020

       Are you in Addenbrooke's, [MB]?   

       (Or maybe that's an intrusive, too-much-real-world question, in which case, feel free not to answer it)
pertinax, Feb 12 2020

       You are a very difficult man to contact, Paul.
UnaBubba, Feb 12 2020

       //Addenbrooke's// I am, for my sins. Hopefully home today once all the oxygen and other crap gets delivered to home.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 12 2020

       Nice to be going home I bet.
doctorremulac3, Feb 12 2020

       So glad you are going home. It's good medicine to surround yourself with that which brings you joy.
blissmiss, Feb 12 2020

       //It's good medicine to surround yourself with that which brings you joy.// - and yet he's still on the Halfbakery surrounded by us...!
hippo, Feb 12 2020

       Incidentally - kudos to Addenbrooke's and the NHS. Care has been flawless. Even their IT system seems to work, to the extent that all tests, scans and appointments happen at the right time and all the results come back promptly. Well impressed.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 12 2020

       Home is best. Well done nhs for looking after our buddy.
po, Feb 12 2020

       God, I wish we had an NHS.
blissmiss, Feb 12 2020

       The NHS is one the best things about life in the UK. Unfortunately bonkers Boris looks set to be bullied into handing over a large portion of it to the greedy Trump moron in exchange for thousands of tons of America's toxic muck, like their bleached chickens, hormone and antibiotic laced beef, and of course their Agent Orange, Monsanto Frankenstein GM crops (imagines extra invigorated blood coursing through Max's extremities!)
xenzag, Feb 12 2020

       first of all, if we wanted to take on UK healthcare, we'd start with dentistry.   

       second of all, you don't have to worry (we do), soon Sanders will give us an NHS   

       third [score!] xenzag figured out a way to make this post political before I did   

       Hope I got a smile out of you [MB] :)
theircompetitor, Feb 12 2020

       Glad you're at home and relatively comfortable [MB]! I was going to request that you vandalize something for me before you leave facility but now that seems ... counterproductive? But then again, as Halfbakers we've become accustomed to the definition of "productivity" being very well pliable.
Letsbuildafort, Feb 12 2020

       Alas, not at home after all. Breathing got worse this morning, and apparently that's important enough for them to hang on to me for a bit longer.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 12 2020

       Oh no! Hope it's a small hurdle to getting you to where you need to be. Hopefully medical science gets to make a fool of you for a little while longer with us! *pulls back corn stalk*
Letsbuildafort, Feb 12 2020

       Breathing is just an in-efficient way of turning carboxyhaemoglobin into oxyhaemoglobin. Shirley there's an artificial way to do that externally? Catalytic surfaces or something?
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 12 2020

       Boo for bad breathing days. But as our lovely Buddhist friends would say, there is something, everywhere, to find joy in. (Pretty young nurse perhaps?)   

       What was your Sats, do you know?
blissmiss, Feb 12 2020

       Well, just now I was on 81% sat with 4 l/min oxygen. They've just bumped me to 10l/min and sats are back up to 90%, which frankly I'd be happy with, were it not for the fact that yesterday I was at 91% with only 2l/min. I'm thinking that all the maths is sliding off the bottom of the page here.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 12 2020

       Well, your two halfbaked items are well on their way, so I hope you get to unwrap them without getting entangled in all of those wires and tubes. Maybe they'll send you home? There's no where like home for enjoying setting up the soggy crisp drying apparatus and contemplating the perfect set of false teeth for the perfect man.
xenzag, Feb 12 2020

       I shall look forward to returning home all the more, knowing what awaits me.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 12 2020

       xenzag, is that code for fish 'n chips or something?   

       MB, get those sats back up, and the Oxy down to 2l again. You are scaring me. Were you up chasing orderlies down the hall trying to nab their name badges so you could break out?
blissmiss, Feb 12 2020

       Hah! Would that I were... In any case, it's time for sleep here now, so I will try and dream my sats higher.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 13 2020

       //Sanders will give us an NHS//   

       I'm voting Sanders, but it would take a miracle for him to win. Anyway Trump vs Sanders was my dream election, so here's hoping they don't cheat him out of the primary again.
Voice, Feb 13 2020

       //head transplants// ////Count me in////   

       You just need to clone yourself now sans higher brain-function while electrically stimulating the growing cloneular muscle tissue for buff-ness and in twenty years or so your frozen brain can be implanted into your own genetically scrubbed eighteen year or-so old body with no rejection issues and you get a brand new lease on life...   

       Now we just have to tackle telomerase degradation and we can all be immortal.   

       God but that would get boring after a while wouldn't it?   

       This whole reincarnation/amnesia thing we got now is a way better ride in my opinion...
...not that I wouldn't stick around for like 1500 years or so given my druthers.

       Personally I think that the many-worlds interpretation will be found to be the big TOE in which case all possible 'you's' exist simultaneously fragmented and none of us ever get to experience completeness on the mortal-coil side of things... barring extenuating circumstances of course, (always gotta read the fine print) and when we die it's like;   

       "OH! Of course! <forehead smack> It all makes perfect sense now! Wow,... what a ride!... Awesome! Let's try... um... this one this time 'round!"   

       I can not think of a better way one might go about filling an infinity with consciousnesses.   

       ...and if I'm wrong? How will any of us know?.. so the possibility exists until disproved.   

       Uh huh! Does so.   

No take-backsies
So there.

       Hang in there, friend, and best wishes. I have enjoyed your sane and erudite commentary on many topics.   

       In other circumstances I would speculate about non- mainstream possibilities such as long-term water fasting, but I am not qualified to do so here. For myself, I signed up for cryonic freezing a few years ago, and I also hope that quantum immortality works out somehow. Tell those doctors that the halfbakery is watching their work with great interest.
sninctown, Feb 13 2020

       Well, I'm here for another day. Breathing is better than yesterday (which was worse than the day before). I really and sincerely appreciate the good wishes.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 13 2020

       // I am not qualified to do so here. //   

       Explain then why you are in the halfbakery.   

       Mere ignorance, lack of ability, a bizarre and controversial world view, downright stupidity and Voices In The Head don't disqualify any of the other halfbakers - what makes you so special, eh ?
8th of 7, Feb 13 2020

       You misunderstand, it is the lack of ignorance, inability, bizarre or controversial world-views, stupidity or Voices In The Head that disqualifies [sninctown] from speculating.
hippo, Feb 13 2020

       More deserving of pity than condemnation, then ...
8th of 7, Feb 13 2020

       If anyone here is short of voices in their head, I could lend some of mine.
No you can't.
Yes he can.
Hush, they can hear us!
pertinax, Feb 13 2020

       It just occured to me that if MB leaves the bakery, which ain't happening, but if it were to happen someday in the far off future, 8th of 7 would be having lengthy conversations with himself all day. Those convos make me laugh, so very often. just like today's "comeback" from him. This makes me sad and morose.   

       Quick, someone through me a donut or something.
blissmiss, Feb 13 2020

       I have a nice kennel ready for 8th, and there'll be walkies every day to snuffle out good leg lifting spots.
xenzag, Feb 13 2020

       //Well, I'm here for another day. Breathing is better than yesterday// - that's really good to hear. I'm not a (medical) doctor, but keeping breathing sounds like a good idea.
hippo, Feb 13 2020

       <Gimli>Keep breathing - that's the key</Gimli>   

       (Actually, since the abbreviation for oxygenated hemoglobin is HbO2, I think we at the HB have to do our part by, along with sending good wishes, taking a few good deep breaths as well. Sympathetic inspiration, if you will.)   

       Deep breath.... Ommmm....   

       (And Max - best wishes and positive thoughts to you. Please don't go telling your caregivers "I can fall asleep faster if my sats are around 80" or "Blue is my favorite color!" or... or... any of several other unprintable things I told mine)
lurch, Feb 13 2020

       [MaxwellBuchanan] - I always enjoy your quick wit and clever turn of phrase, noteworthy in this place where such things are uncommonly common.   

       Of course wishes are bullshit, nonetheless I offer you my best ones.
tatterdemalion, Feb 13 2020

       // that's important enough for them to hang on to me for a bit longer.//

Boo! for people who keep hanging on too long...wait...no.
DrBob, Feb 13 2020

       Link - "Breathe" Trygve Seim
xenzag, Feb 13 2020

       Hmph ... a clever attempt to fake your death ... I am not fooled.   

       I'll be watching for you.
normzone, Feb 13 2020

       Maybe its a double-bluff
pocmloc, Feb 13 2020

       Farewell, [Maxwell]. You have always been a light in these parts, a spark of wit and erudition, of thoughtful analysis and playful combativeness. You will be sorely missed.   

       May your estate flourish in eternity.
BunsenHoneydew, Feb 13 2020

       [ deep sympathy breaths ]   

       That's an idea I can absolutely countenance!
reensure, Feb 13 2020

       //Sympathetic inspiration//   

       Can't believe you missed this one [lurch], must be a trap to illicit precisely the response I'm about to offer?   

       [Considers the sharp pointy steel teeth]   

       [Steps in anyway]   

       Sympathetic 'aspiration' Shirley?
Skewed, Feb 13 2020

       [Max] already mentioned "aspirational pneumonia" in another recent thread. (Which is something I had about a year ago, and my doc joked "Well, you can cross that off your bucket list" but I couldn't draw a deep enough breath to respond)   

       It was actually as close as I dared come to an "inspirometer" joke - I have several of those, and they're not as bad as the "Foley catheter" jokes, but they're all a lot funnier if you're not in the middle of suffering the damn things.
lurch, Feb 13 2020

       Yep, it's a hard call I'm struggling with here, what [Max] may or may not find funny right now.   

       Can't even figure out if I should bun (sending support) or bone (this is crappy & shouldn't happen) :(
Skewed, Feb 13 2020

       Guys, over the last couple of weeks I've had so many tubes inserted that my biggest health risk has now become entanglement. Trust me - there's nothing you can say that I won't find funny.   

       And, by way of update, I'm now back home with a portable (and I use the term very loosely) oxygen generator purring away, a G&T at hand, and a much rosier view of the world. I've also discovered that I remain lucid* even with sats below 60% (though I won't make a habit of it), which is good to know. Psychology is half the battle.   

       (*if you can understand what I'm typing, that is)
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 13 2020

       chemon, joking is the best way to see anyone off this mortal coil. That which cannot be avoided must be embraced. Benign jokes are an excellent medicine. You're not being an insensitive clot, you're offering encouragement and a breath of fresh air.
Voice, Feb 13 2020

       //G&T// Nice! The quinine laced drink designed to fight malaria (and sobriety) in the far reaches of the British Empire.   

       Knew we were kindered sprits.
doctorremulac3, Feb 13 2020

       glad to hear you're home [MB].
theircompetitor, Feb 13 2020

       //a G&T at hand,//   

       I'm sure the medical personnel were competent, but there's some chance they didn't consider or completely rule out malaria. In that context, it's irresponsible not to self-treat. Just in case.
bs0u0155, Feb 13 2020

       // my biggest health risk has now become entanglement. //   

       Is that quantum entanglement ?   

       If someone tugs on one of the tubes, will some unfortunate disease-stricken life-form across the other side of the Universe get a sudden, inexplicable twinge in a sensitive place... ?
8th of 7, Feb 13 2020

       Wow, what to say, I've been gone so long I feel like an interloper who walked into a wake, and I guess I did! I am so sad for the family of the Halfbakery.   

       I always enjoyed your immense imagination Max, I wish I had been able to understand half of half of it. Fair Winds dear Paul.   

       thank you Una for yet another laugh through the pain.
dentworth, Feb 13 2020

       //will some unfortunate disease-stricken life-form across the other side of the Universe get a sudden, inexplicable twinge in a sensitive place... ?// I'm not sure - let me know.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 13 2020

       I'm so glad someone translated for me..."G&T". I thought might be a type of remote control for the Tele. Well look, it was in his hand when he got home, and that's the first thing that came to mind, thankfully.
blissmiss, Feb 13 2020

       What can be the harm in keeping hope? If anyone's in an intellectual position to survive this, it's you.   

       It may be helpful to add that people can live with 1 lung and 1 kidney. The lungs can also recover despite years of smoking. The answer may still exist.
4and20, Feb 13 2020

       //an interloper who walked into a wake//   

       Welcome back, [dentworth]. Lope in any time.
pertinax, Feb 13 2020

       So many past bakers I've not seen around for a while. Thank you for honoring one of the most prolific amongst us, and for coming by to send your best wishes.
blissmiss, Feb 14 2020

I just realized I once told you that you'd give me credit for telling it like it is, but they haven't proven the existence of Bigfoot yet for you to be able to admit the possibility so you see you can't go anywhere until they do, and it will probably take them some time. Can't get out of it that easy Hoss...

       [Slips a small card to [Max] with the name of the most expensive commercially available drink he can find with Google]   

Skewed, Feb 14 2020

       I'm sure this has already been thought about but ... in the event of a less-than-positive outcome, will we have any way of knowing for sure, other than watching a gradually extending quiet period on this thread?
pertinax, Feb 14 2020

       [pertinax] It's "Schrödinger's Max" - if you don't open this idea, you don't know what's happened
hippo, Feb 14 2020

       As you no doubt know, p53 mutations are so common in cancers that they are a regular focus of research. Perhaps a current clinical trial is in the offing?   

       Link above, not particularly in the theological sense.
4and20, Feb 14 2020

       We have been promised signs from the other planes of existence. And MB won't go back on his word, I'm sure. I'm fully expecting the male Cardinal to come and visit my birdfeeder if the very worst outcome should come to pass.
blissmiss, Feb 14 2020

       Forget the cardinal. Send the pope hisself.
RayfordSteele, Feb 14 2020

       If I see the pope on my bird feeder I'll know it's a sign
hippo, Feb 14 2020

       Very funny you two. Must I draw a picture? Wait, a male Cardinal from the local Diocese or even Anthony Hopkins would be rather fun for my cat to watch from the window, too. Bring it on.   

       Voice-That was a great clip. Can't go wrong when you are "looking on the bright side of life".
blissmiss, Feb 14 2020

       // the pope on my bird feeder I'll know it's a sign //   

       No, the feeder will be a Papal Dispensation....
8th of 7, Feb 14 2020

       How did you get out of your kennel? All of that incessant barking is disturbing my cats.
xenzag, Feb 14 2020

       [MB] I read that fasting makes chemotherapy more effective and spares healthy tissue "several times". fortunately there are things online that support that statement [link]. If you get chemotherapy it could be something to ponder.
beanangel, Feb 14 2020

       If I get as far as having chemo, I'll bear that in mind - thanks.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 14 2020

       (Bean) He's currently undergoing G&T therapy. I'm optimistic he'll be responsive to treatment.
doctorremulac3, Feb 15 2020

       //a trap to illicit precisely the response//   

       "Elicit" would be more licit.   

       ("Listen, Licit Police; it's Ellis 'n' 'is licentious lice!")
pertinax, Feb 15 2020

       // there's some chance they didn't consider or completely rule out malaria. In that context, it's irresponsible not to self-treat. //   

       One Nobel Prize winner from Germany who, incidentally, turned out to be a Nazi, happened to win the Nobel for giving syphilis patients doses of malaria.
4and20, Feb 15 2020

       <Tortuous iambic pentameter>   

       We know he's just pedantic and not rude,   

       He loves to take the piss out of our grammar,   

       It's we who have opinions that are skewed,   

       And he who has an educated manner.   

       He knows the way that many things are done,   

       In classics, science, space and DNA,   

       He makes us laugh a lot with silly fun,   

       He brightens up and educates our day.   

       The wisdom of the man is really great,   

       He tells us all the way he knows things are,   

       We marvel at the size of his estate,   

       Halfbakers know that he's a super star.   

       We really didn't want to hear this news,   

       although not all his thoughts deserve a bun,   

       we love his crazy, wise and thoughtful views,   

       and wish you all the best [MaxwellBuchanan]   

       </Tortuous iambic pentameter>   

       OK, I know, well you try and do better then...
bhumphrys, Feb 15 2020

       Eww: what did the malaria do to the syphilis patients?
pertinax, Feb 15 2020

       It killed 15% of patients. He later sterilized people deemed schizophrenic because of excessive masturbation.
4and20, Feb 15 2020

       Well, hello [maxwellbuchanan], it felt super important to drop back into the HB after a few years away.   

       When I first stopped by here in the early 2000s, I was struck immediately by the sense of fun and family here. I could intellectually understand the geography of contributors, but it was so warming to read the obvious camaraderie.   

       Like a family, there are disputes. Arguments. About stuff that doesn’t matter, and about custard too.   

       There’s growth, too. People I’ve met here have married and had children in their halfbakery lives and yes, we’ve lost some amazing contributors such as [bristolz].   

       People join, people meet, people collaborate, they learn, they laugh but regardless, I feel I know — more, “knew” — many here through their ideas.   

       You too [MB]. I’m so sorry to hear of your diagnosis but while you’re in optimistic mode, you can be doubly sure we all are. X
jonthegeologist, Feb 15 2020

       How are you faring, MB? Home, happy, relatively healthy? Enquiring minds and all...
blissmiss, Feb 16 2020

       He's with me and 8 over in the "Custard Filled Sub Chaser" lounge. Drop in and say hi.
doctorremulac3, Feb 16 2020

       I'm doing embarrassingly OK. Today, I went upstairs (first time since home from hospital) without oxygen and without passing out. Also took Mrs. Max out for a drive, so I can confirm that 80% O2 sats are good enough for tackling the A11. And have been off oxygen for most of the day.   

       Also (and this is the good bit) I found (online) an experimental compound that is the ONLY drug tailored to cancers that only have a p53 mutation (ie, that have none of the other "targettable" mutations). It's been through some clinical trials and a lot of in vitro testing. So, if all else fails (which so far, it is)...   

       If anyone is an expert on (a) organic chemistry (b) bioavailability of drugs vs prodrugs or (c) the effects of massive apoptosis on the body, feel free to get in touch.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 16 2020

       Have a fruity bun. Hope it helps.
po, Feb 16 2020

       Are we bunning this? Ok, sure.   

       Now this is a support bun, not a "this is good" bun.   

       Buns are complicated, they're an enigma. One does not question or over analyze the bun. Ponder yes, but celebrate the fact that they are a times mysterious and inexplicable.   

       Sometimes a bun is just a bun.
doctorremulac3, Feb 16 2020

       I agree. And unless we hear of a backslide, we shall assume, meaning me, that you are solidly improving.
blissmiss, Feb 16 2020

       //I'm doing embarrassingly OK.// Very good news. Hope you continue to get strong enough for some effective treatment to be delivered now.
xenzag, Feb 16 2020

       Thanks, and me too!
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 16 2020

       Hey Max, would there be the downside to getting into ketosis by eating a pure ketogenic diet for a few days just to see how it made you feel? Not looking for a miracle cure or anything, just to gauge if you might get some benefit from it. I'm experimenting with keto and fasting and find you get this weird electric feeling, I believe because your body thinks you need to go hunt for food so it kicks in some extra energy. It's very weird and hard to describe. Not groggy at all, energized would be the word. Maybe just cut out all carbs, get satiated on healthy fats, plenty of water and try to limit your eating window to 8 hours or so?   

       Is that totally crazy? Is this a wildly inappropriate time to be messing around with dietary experiments? I totally understand if it is. Not saying I know how you feel, but I had very bad acne as a kid, a trillionth the problem you have I know, but everybody not only had stupid unwanted advice they'd give me, the next time they saw me they'd see I still had acne and get pissed that I didn't take their advice. Point is I know suggestions can be sort of obnoxious. Still, understand where it comes from, we're wanting to help you, right or wrong.   

       Anyway, put a link up. Might be an interesting read at least.
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2020

       Seeing as how it's likely that specialists can make loads of bucks in the US in our weird healthcare system as compared to what the state offers for the NHS, have you considered reaching out to foreign specialists such as what we might have in the colonies, or over in Finland? I hear they're top notch. I have no idea how the logistics would work; perhaps Sturton or 8th could kidnap a cancer specialist and lock him in the estate?
RayfordSteele, Feb 17 2020

       I agree, doc. I've been intermittent fasting for a year now, and I've lost almost 50 lbs doing that and upping my exercise. That comes easy because I have so much more energy in the morning. I'm also vegan now, instead of vegetarian, and so the cheese factor/calories are gone. I think everyone should at least try it, and Keto as well. If you've not ever been in ketosis before, you will be amazed at the energy level created.
blissmiss, Feb 17 2020

       //After the 3rd day, food cravings vanish//   

       Can confirm from personal experience on more than one occasion, definitely thereabouts, maybe after day two / by day three sometimes.
Skewed, Feb 17 2020

       Some number of years ago I met someone who was diagnosed with cancer so I did some research. At the time, a (peer-reviewed?) survey (in PubMed?) showed that the best country in Europe for oncology was Sweden.   

       The person has since recovered, using medical facilities in their slightly backward country, although adopting multiple cats seemed to be highly effective...
4and20, Feb 17 2020

       //the best country in Europe for oncology was Sweden// very few people die of cancer in Sweden, because so many people die by being brutally, but weirdly aesthetically pleasingly, murdered at the hands of a warped serial killer - followed by their death being investigated by a troubled detective with a cool Scandi fashion sense and a dark and mysterious back-story.
hippo, Feb 17 2020

       // embarrassingly OK //   

       {embarrassing ragged cheer}
pertinax, Feb 17 2020

       //getting into ketosis// Hmm - good question, and the short answer is I don't know. I'll raise it with my oncologist and see; anything's worth a shot.   

       //reaching out to foreign specialists// Possible. My feeling so far is that, if something is likely to work, the NHS will provide it. The only exception will be treatments that are unlikely to help (but just might), or treatments that the patient insists on even though the doc knows they'll do more harm than good.   

       There are also clinical trials, of course, which are a different kettle of tea: the problem there is that companies generally want their trial patients to be as healthy as possible aside from the disease, otherwise the results looks bad. And thanks to the weirdness of my particular cancer, I'm physically in much worse shape than I should be for someone at this stage of the disease. Hence the need to consider home-brew options.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 17 2020

       Tough choice Max. Posting a final farewell only to survive cancer would be somewhat less embarrassing, I think, than fighting off cancer only to be killed by healing crystals.
DrBob, Feb 17 2020

       Surely though, not as embarrassing as being cured by healing crystals?
hippo, Feb 17 2020

       :D :D :D
DrBob, Feb 17 2020

       I've tried the healing crystals. They scratch the throat something awful.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 17 2020

       Dying of embarrassment in those circumstances would be the ultimate irony.
8th of 7, Feb 17 2020

       You know Max, if you can get some information out of this battle that will benefit others eventually, it'll be kind of like the guy who rushes the pillbox to throw a grenade in to save the rest of the guys.   

       Going down fighting?   

       Your call, I'm just here to ramble of lists of concepts for your review. Consider it like the guy offering you a tray of hors d'oeuvres. They're there if you want them but don't feel bad about slapping the plate out of his hand and telling him to fuck off if you're not hungry. LOL. <--- (I have the uncanny ability to crack myself up)
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2020

       Ses link - Rose Tisnado was one of my best friends.... you might find her story has some resonances especially the bit where she talks about fasting....
xenzag, Feb 17 2020

       I was at the library today, so I picked up a slightly strange Immunology textbook from 2013, albeit put together by a team of tenured Ph.D decorated immunology professors. Smack dab in the middle of some rather thick biochemical details was an aside about Willam Coley and "Coley's Toxins," which were an early attempt to jog the body's immune system by injecting bacterial mixes directly into tumors. The textbook implies that Coley was doing the right thing, then drops the subject just as quickly.   

       And here's a coincidence almost as strange: The Wikipedia warning against ever trying "Coley's Toxins," comes via Cancer Research UK, which reportedly had one of p53's original discoverers as an executive.
4and20, Feb 17 2020

       I've no real idea what your talking about [4and20].   

       But I get a vague hint of.   

       'debunk & dismiss, realise there might have been something there, wait long enough for decencies sake, rebrand & patent'   

       [Questioning look?]
Skewed, Feb 17 2020

       All I can say is stay away from shark cartilage. Also from sharks.
theircompetitor, Feb 17 2020

       Embedded in my last anno are the possibilities of exploring two more options, including what will probably be greater sources of documentation for p53-related treatments from a well-known source. I can't offer real advice, since I'm little more than a self-preserving hobbyist, but there are worse hobbies than reading Immunology books.
4and20, Feb 17 2020

       //Also (and this is the good bit) I found (online) an experimental compound that is the ONLY drug tailored to cancers that only have a p53 mutation (ie, that have none of the other "targettable" mutations). It's been through some clinical trials and a lot of in vitro testing. So, if all else fails (which so far, it is)...//   

       Is the compound available through Sigma-Aldrich?
If so, given your "Molecular Biologist - Heal Thyself" proposal, I think you should put your money where your mouth is.

       Unless it's too much money of course - in which case I will chip in, although if it worked I'd want a funding credit on a Journal of Irreproducible Results paper for the n=1 trial.
Also, if the compound can form any sort of crystal I want a reference to 'healing crystals'.

       //very few people die of cancer in Sweden, because so many people die by being brutally, but weirdly aesthetically pleasingly, murdered at the hands of a warped serial killer - followed by their death being investigated by a troubled detective with a cool Scandi fashion sense and a dark and mysterious back-story.//   

       Someone should make one of those interactive maps for fictional murders, with referenced crowdsourced data.
There'd essentially be no-go areas wherever a detective lived for long enough - St. Mary Mead, Jersey, the villages of Midsomer, Los Vegas, New York, Miami
... actually practically all of America.
Loris, Feb 17 2020

       //Is the compound available through Sigma-Aldrich// It is, and I have an account. (Or at least my now-moribund company does.). One snag is that it's about $15 per mg, and daily dose in clinical trials was 5 grams.   

       But it gets more interesting. The drug used in the trials is actually a pro-drug, meaning that the body metabolizes it to create the active form. And the active form is also available and is dirt cheap. So, what I'm trying to figure out, is why can't you just administer the active (and affordable) form directly? If the only reason is that the active form isn't absorbed (it's given orally), then that's an easy fix because I can just rig up an I/V bag and mainline it.   

       So, anyone who understands prodrug activation?   

       (BTW, I already had my diagnosis when I posted that "heal thyself" idea - just wasn't quite up to sharing at that time. I know this isn't what the HB is meant for, but it has meant a lot to me to be able to tell you all and bounce ideas around).
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 17 2020

       It would seem that you already have the academic juice to ask one of the study co-authors directly.
4and20, Feb 17 2020

       Yes, thinking about that, just don't want to ring any alarm bells.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 17 2020

       You're a respected molecular biologist, [MaxwellBuchanan]. Just make up a convincing-sounding study title, then go knock on their door (or maybe phone or e-mail, given your current state...). They don't need to know that YOU are the test subject...
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 17 2020

       Sorry - the only prodrug I have any experience with was a case where the patent expired on it, so the pharma company took a patent on the metabolite and then conned the insurance companies into believing the generic of the original wasn't biosimilar. Ka-ching!
lurch, Feb 17 2020

       n_s is right. You don't have to name the designated motivation behind the study, other than curiosity and a will to heal. You've done that before, kind sir, and you are still the same old Joe that did that, so to speak.   

       As for being not in the realm of the half bakery, if we can't all come together to try and see another baker through the fight of and for his life, well then, If that's not ok, I'm in the wrong cage at the zoo. (Shush 8th.)
blissmiss, Feb 17 2020

       If IV is imposing, then consider enteric capsule or enteric paste from one of the things they make enteric pastes for rodents out of.   

       Also piperine makes rapamycin (a longevity drug/chemotherapuetic) 2.6-5.2 times better absorbed at the GI tract.   

       Mice given rapamycin in their food live 60% longer, so if you have the urge to live to 160 (or longer) that is a good one to know about. I took 72 mg of rapamycin with piperine a day for about 3 weeks and I think it gave me a rash (common side effect), now I am on about 10 mg a day, with 25 mg twice a week, with piperine and no rash. rapamycin is $40-80/gram at alibaba.com So it is like $1-2 a day. I take it in enteric capsules from ebay, the rash made me think it is doing something.
beanangel, Feb 17 2020

       Rapamycin looks like interesting stuff, but it's got a laundry list of adverse effects.
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 18 2020

       Well, if I can make it to 60 (which currently looks very, very optimistic), I'll give serious consideration to rapamycin to add another 100 years or so.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 18 2020

       A thought - this would be a less than opportune time for a hb hard drive crash. Perhaps a contingency plan is in order.
tatterdemalion, Feb 18 2020

       The halfbakery is backed up daily. Sadly, backing up halfbakers themselves is still in very early experimental stages (cut to jar of blue-tinted fluid in which some sort of creature halfway between a sea horse and a grilled cheese sandwich is stirring slowly).
jutta, Feb 18 2020

       but surely there's sufficient data to create convincing chatbots to carry indefinite debates :)
theircompetitor, Feb 18 2020

       I've already created a couple of backups of myself. One is about 6ft tall and finishing her PhD. The other is my genome on a hard drive. But, as Woody Allen said about immortality "No, I want to achieve it by not dying."   

       Also, thank you, [jutta] for your forbearance - I know all this is way, way off the HB's trajectory.   

       Also also, does anyone here have access to the Beilstein database?
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 18 2020

       My pharmacologist sister-in-law might. She runs the lab at UNC Charlotte.
RayfordSteele, Feb 18 2020

       That's interesting. Would she be open to the possibility of running a quick search? Beilstein lets you specify a compound and find synthetic routes to it (or a compound and a precursor, and find synthetic routes between the two). But I don't know how much hassle is involved in doing this, since I've never used Beilstein.   

       On a related topic, I'd just like to announce that I've been off oxygen for two days now and my sats are back up to 93%. I know it's a small triumph but...
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 18 2020

       I can check with her. Send along what you're looking for to my email and I can see if she can do it.
RayfordSteele, Feb 18 2020

       Very good to hear. Re Beilstein database - this seems like something anyone could access without using a remote third party, especially via a University connection.
xenzag, Feb 18 2020

       // seems like something anyone could access// Would that it were so. It's now owned by Elsevier and requires a subscription. It's possible that Cambridge has blanket access, but alas I don't have a Cambridge login and don't know any tame chemists.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 18 2020

       Oops, not UNC Charlotte. UNC Chapel Hill.
RayfordSteele, Feb 18 2020

       Any UNC is a good UNC.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 18 2020

       Update: Natasha says that apparently UNC cut all ties with Elsevier last year so not likely. Sorry.
RayfordSteele, Feb 18 2020

       //I don't have a Cambridge login// A quick glance...... I think I saw Athens account log-in? Then there is the question: how much is a subscription measured against your needs and of course general curiousity? There's always a way.......
xenzag, Feb 18 2020

       Perhaps they have a yearly subscription that could be deferred for a bit...?   

       Anyone have a rich uncle? Mine died awhile ago and left his money to my useless cousins.
RayfordSteele, Feb 18 2020

       Apparently a subscription to Reaxys (a portal into Beilstein) runs at 7K/year, which isn't impossible but seems a shame to spend it unless it gets me somewhere. I'm asking around a few friends, though.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 18 2020

       // Mine died awhile ago and left his money to my useless cousins //   

       <Hums theme from "Kind Hearts and Coronets" />   

       Where there's a will, there's a way, as probate lawyers say.
8th of 7, Feb 18 2020

       MB, that is the best news, (sats at 93%), that I have heard in a long while. Keep up the breathing buddy, or I'll cross that ocean and kick the shit outta ya. Hahahaha
blissmiss, Feb 18 2020

       [MaxwellBuchanan]; a friend of mine is a pharmacologist at a university down the road. I've asked if she can get access to Beilstein; naturally, she's on holiday, so I'll get back with an answer when I hear.
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 18 2020

MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 18 2020

       [xen] - I shall never again have to suffer the horrors of soggy crisps. That alone makes the diagnosis almost worthwhile.   

       Thank you.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 18 2020

       You're welcome! Hope you use wisely. The apparatus was also one of the prizes I made for the Self Improvement Quiz Show I run from time to time.
xenzag, Feb 18 2020

       [MaxwellBuchanan] You have likely already heard about senolytics, they get rid of cytes secreting things that cause trouble to the material around them. A couple senolytics are chemotherapeutic agents. One of them is navitoclax which has some effects on the lungs. "nativoclax is senolytic in the culture-acclimated IMR-90 lung fibroblast-like cell strain, while it is less so in primary human lung fibroblasts isolated from patients https:// www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov /pmc/ articles/PMC5641223/ ", also a [link]   

       The article is interesting to read even though I think it is a different part of your lungs.
beanangel, Feb 19 2020

       It would have to be a very quiet piece of whistle-blowing, alas.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 19 2020

       [bigs], for God's sake put the soapbox away. As a matter of fact, put the screen away. Go outside and take a walk.
RayfordSteele, Feb 19 2020

       Hey Max, by the way, for years now this is how I dealt with confusing or badly described ideas posted here. Say for instance I'd see a post: "Flying Watermelon Nuclear Particle Ghost Flavoring" or the like. I'd just go to your annotation and read your summation which could be as simple as a one sentence synopsis to a "Hu?" at which time I'd say "If Max doesn't get this I won't." and move on. Should be noted that I'd also check 8th's insult to the idea which could also be helpful.   

       As far as the nutrition thing, it is worth noting that we've been given very bad advice over the years. The US Department of Agriculture for instance giving us the food pyramid that suggests eating 20,000 to 8 million servings of high carb agricultural products daily.   

       There's a very good book called "Big Fat Surprise" which, even if you couldn't care less about dietary science is a very interesting case study of how prevailing wisdom can go wrong due to many factors such as bad logic, corruption and outright deceit among self proclaimed experts, politicians and industry.
doctorremulac3, Feb 19 2020

       //confusing or badly described ideas posted here// I don't believe such a thing exists.
pocmloc, Feb 19 2020

       Well, I should hate to be thought of as authoritative, but thanks. Perhaps for the time being, I should post my O2 sats alongside any comments, so that you can better decide if they're the product of a switched-on brain or not.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 19 2020

       //I should post my O2 sats alongside any comments//   

       Speaking of which, how those numbers lookin' today?
doctorremulac3, Feb 19 2020

       I hit 95% earlier, which is bloody amazing. Still plummets if I stand up and move, but it's wayyy better than it has been. I suspect the blood clots on my "good" lung are beginning to resolve.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 19 2020

       I'll call "awesome!" on that!
doctorremulac3, Feb 19 2020

       My FIL takes statins. Work bloody amazing in him.
RayfordSteele, Feb 19 2020

       Hellz. All I could suggest is a Foxtail Millet Pongal. Too many medical approaches, no fun.
reensure, Feb 19 2020

       You really don't want to look up the most common definitions of FIL in the urbandictionary.com
4and20, Feb 19 2020

       Thankyou, on the basis of the authorship we will note the recommendation and avoid not only UD but using search engines in general on that TLA.
8th of 7, Feb 19 2020

       Max. That's bloody awful news.   

       I'm not going to waffle on about what an honour/pleasure it's been and how inspirational, informative and amusing your ideas and anno's are... That's all true, but this is not the time for eulogizing, because you're going to beat this.   

       Keep fighting. We're depending on you.
Frankx, Feb 20 2020

       [MB] potentially valuable, very valuable information, there is a 9 mer peptide that turns the anticancer gene P53 back on in your exact kind of aden-cancer you have, at only 9 amino acids long you can get this synthesized very cheaply online if you can get them to tell you the sequence. Paper at [link]
beanangel, Feb 20 2020

       //That's bloody awful news// I'm with you on that one. However, the strange thing is that I feel almost OK, mentally - I think you quickly develop a new baseline.   

       //potentially valuable, very valuable information// Potentially, yes, and thanks, [beany]! From a first look at the paper, it seems that the peptide does restore function in mutant p53, but only causes a modest restoration of apoptosis (cell death). BUT, it may well synergise with chemotherapeutic agents (which damage DNA and trigger apoptosis). Plus, as you noted, getting a peptide made is cheap and simple. So, seriously mate, thanks.   

       Coincidentally, one of the authors of that paper, and co- inventor on the patent, Alan Fersht, is a mate. I'll drop him a line.   

       Meanwhile, I'm pressing ahead with APR-246 (which does something similar, but has been through some clinical trials already) and am getting a batch manufactured in China.   

       I am feeling more optimistic by the day, and I will beat this f****r if it's the last thing I do (which is quite likely). On the plus side, if I go down, the cancer's going down with me.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 20 2020

       Hell yes! Fight Max!! Hit this damn thing with everything you've got!!
doctorremulac3, Feb 20 2020

       //and I will beat this f****r if it's the last thing I do//

Best HB anno ever. Well, apart from the famous oneoffdave comment in which he revealed that he was a unidexter.
DrBob, Feb 20 2020

       Damn. Well, I'm prepared to have one leg off if you think it'll help.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 20 2020

       We could clone it and run some DNA checks against common risk factors vis a vis chemo, but a pound of flesh would be more than enough. Are you on antibiotics yet? Apparently if you start chemo there's a high risk of superbugs.   

Voice, Feb 20 2020

       No antibiotics at present, but maybe if they get to the point where they can start me on chemo. Am about to start on steroids (to improve appetite), which also compromise the immune system, but will come back off them before any chemo.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 20 2020

       How about some chili? I make the best chili in the world
Voice, Feb 20 2020

       //How about some chili? I make the best chili in the world//   

       That gives me an idea. (link)
doctorremulac3, Feb 20 2020

       [xen] - I am now in possession of my second parcel, and its contents. I can only say that it is the most wonderful and unexpected item that could possibly exist. It is an absolute. Not to mention the craftsmanship that has gone into its construction. Are they modelled on your own masticatory apparati? (Not topologically, obviously, but dentally)?
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       //Well, I'm prepared to have one leg off if you think it'll help.//

How much worse could it make things? At least you'll still have your one good eye & that hump.
DrBob, Feb 22 2020

       I prefer the term 'hunch', personally.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       hahaha. yes. Health still improving?
blissmiss, Feb 22 2020

       Yep - blood clots on lungs are definitely clearing. I've consistently got O2 sats in the low 90's now (without supplementary oxygen). Legs are knackered though - but that's partly a matter of regaining muscle and I hope that'll be easier now I can breathe a bit. Other issue is that I can't eat much at a time - left-sided cancer is squishing my stomach. Little and often. I'm beginning to think there's a real chance they'll let me start chemo.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       [link] to http://p53.iarc.fr/. The p53 mutation database. If you please, be a little more specific about your mutation. It makes a difference if looking for pilot studies or treatment specifics.   

       Some substances proposed to mitigate cancer: N-acetyl cysteine; Sulforaphane (from cruciferous vegetables) GSH/GST protection to prevent protein breakdown   

       Bowman-Birk protease inhibitors (from barley) -- increase fidelity of DNA repair   

       Selective estrogen receptor modulators, called SERMs for short; Retinoids; NSAIDs (from soy) (also prescription fenretinide) -- antiproliferation, modulate hormone or growth factors.   

       Inhibitors of oncogene activity. Perillyl alcohol and its precursor limonene (essential oils like lavender, lemongrass, sage, and peppermint); DHEA, and prescription FTI 276   

       Vitamin D; Folic acid   

       That's about it for general (and one specific to TP52 -- FTI 276)   

       Beyond that, you'd have to fit a basic economics of treatment model, ie, chemo and monitoring.   

       Best wishes, mate!
reensure, Feb 22 2020

       good news
theircompetitor, Feb 22 2020

       [reensure] I'll dig out the molecular data on my cancer, including the specific p53 mutation. It's a miss-sense mutation that probably leads to protein misfolding, and apparently misfolded p53 can hang around longer than good p53, so it's a problem even if only one of the two gene copies is mutated. APR-246 seems to help lots of different p53 mutants to fold correctly, which is one reason why it's so promising.   

       Re. FTI-276, I hadn't heard of it, so thanks. But my quick initial reading suggests it's mainly for KRAS mutated cancers (alas, my KRAS is normal; in fact everything tested is normal apart from p53).   

       Re. economics - as far as I can tell, the NHS will do whatever can be done, as long as it's predicted to lead to net benefit. Where they can't help is applying not-fully- tested drugs, or treatments where the risk of harm outweighs the risk of benefit. In those cases, I figure it's up to me to make the call and to pay for whatever I need.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       OK, so my p53 mutation is Arg175His (at the DNA level, it's 524G>A).   

       G>A (and C>T) are among the commonest mutations in DNA. It's just my luck that out of 3,000,000,000 bases, that single one got changed by just a few atoms. (Of course there are probably other mutations driving the cancer, but not in any of the 50 or so genes they examined. And p53's a likely first step.)
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       // I figure it's up to me to make the call and to pay for whatever I need.// Crowd funding with an HB link? I think plenty here would stump up some loose change, or even dispatch some loose women to hit the streets. (probably not allowed to say that anymore)
xenzag, Feb 22 2020

       Pah. I'd rather people saved their money and had a drink on my behalf. And I'm sure there are better things for loose women to be doing!   

       Incidentally, we're now a week beyond the doctors' most pessimistic prognosis and I'm planning to embarrass them even more than myself.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       Yes, weren't you meant to be dead by now?
pocmloc, Feb 22 2020

       I've never been good on timekeeping.   

       Of course, it's possible that I am - it'd be just my luck to end up in an afterlife consisting only of the HB.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       Thank, Max. Neither I nor the wife has that particular SNP (rs28934578). I had to look, no point, no foul.   

       Histidine immediately suggests an active site in your protein, but to what end; a lot of histidine residues coordinate as enzymes in protein folded pockets   

       Arginine has a sumoylation interaction of note and suggests a structural protein role.   

       The protein seems amenable to acetylation, ie, research places it inside the proteins' folds (but responsive) and proteins may regain some function via post translational modifiction when their odd histidine is occupied. I'll see what is discoverable after a bit. Dinner calls.
reensure, Feb 22 2020

       Well, it's considered a pathogenic mutation, so good thing! As far as I know, only my cancer has it. (I've got my baseline genome on disc, but haven't sat down to analyse it properly.)   

       You understand proteins better than I do - biologist?
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       Yet another Twilight Zone-ish theme..."I died and went to the halfbakery, forever". Hahahaha.   

       You might even be doomed to get stuck in the old "Unrequited Love" idea that had more drama than a Lifetime Channel binge.   

       Hahaha Oh hell no, that would make the devil himself look rather attractive.   

       So glad you are better and that my hope scope is seemingly even brighter than before.
blissmiss, Feb 22 2020

       Thanks. Mine too. The plan as of now is: get on chemo+immuno to reduce cancer and alleviate some symptoms; stay on chemo+immuno until the cancer becomes resistant; use APR-246 to kill more cancer cells; persuade them to try chemo again but this time with APR-246, killing more cancer cells again; cross fingers and hope something else has turned up by then.   

       Have also sourced carboplatin and cisplatin in case the real medics won't start me on chemo. Oh the fun of DIY.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 22 2020

       As someone who never studied this stuff, this all sounds just as plausible as:

Roy: What about EMS recombination?
Tyrell: We've already tried it. Ethyl methane sulfonate as an alkylating agent and a potent mutagen. It created a virus so lethal the subject was dead before he left the table.
Roy: Then a repressor protein that blocks the operating cells.
Tyrell: Wouldn't obstruct replication, but it does give rise to an error in replication so that the newly formed DNA strand carries a mutation
hippo, Feb 23 2020

       [Max], I have to admit that I don't check in on the Halfbakery all that often anymore, but when I do you are—in all seriousness—one of the few Halfbakers I check on first to see what they have come up with lately. Whenever I see one of your ideas in bold it makes me happy to know that the Halfbakery is still alive and well in my protracted absence.   

       It is therefore unacceptable for you to die. Beat the fuck out of this cancer, or else I'll book a flight over to the UK and beat the fuck out of you. If that's not enough motivation to live, I don't know what else to tell you.   

       Much love mate, from a guy you've never met, who lives half a world away, and who thinks about you more than you probably ever realized or were entirely comfortable with.
ytk, Feb 23 2020

       Cheers, [ytk], your offer to come over and beat the crap out of me is touching. I shall indeed attempt to pre-empt that by beating the crap out of this cancer.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 23 2020

       hippo, as I recall Roy got quite unreasonably angry after that conversation. Although he made up for any psychotically violent murders he may have committed by having a lovely death scene at the end with a dove.
DrBob, Feb 23 2020

       We would dispute that his anger was unreasonable, in the circumstances.
8th of 7, Feb 23 2020

       Afternoon Max! I hope that the machine that goes 'Ping' is still happily pinging away! :)
DrBob, Feb 24 2020

       Well, saw the oncology consultant this morning, and it looks like I'll be well enough to start chemo+immuno within a week or so. Expecting it'll make me feel like crap physically, but will be a boost psychologically to be fighting back.   

       Also, finally got my order placed for custom-synthesis of my miracle drug. Either that or I have just sent £12K to a Chinese restaurant.   

       All machines are ping-nominal.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 24 2020

       Super great to hear Max.
theircompetitor, Feb 24 2020

       // Either that or I have just sent £12K to a Chinese restaurant. //   

       <Looks up from furtively counting thick wad of used Yuan notes/>   

       Yhor ordah leddy velly soon, sah ! Sendee chop-chop !   

       You wan' plawn clackers wi' tha' ?
8th of 7, Feb 24 2020

       That's f'en awesome!   

       I found an actual clip of Max's oncologist targeting the cancer and directing the staff to start the chemo. (link)   

       My message to you Max: Strength and honor brother! Fight that cancer with everything you've got!   

       And here's my message to Max's cancer: "Get ready for your chemical nuking and oh yea... FUCK YOU CANCER!!!!"   

       (Here's another link to your chemo vs the cancer. Your chemo is the Americans, the cancer is the Nazis.)
doctorremulac3, Feb 24 2020

       Great news, [Max]! - could you explain a bit more about what your 'miracle drug' is and how it works?
hippo, Feb 24 2020

       I echo what the good [doctorremulac3] said. Word for word, but I'm too much of a lady to say it.
blissmiss, Feb 24 2020

       Hey, [doc], good to see that Tom Hanks is on the case.   

       [hippo] re the wonderdrug. So, my cancer has none of the genetic mutations that can be easily targetted by current "tailored" therapies. However, it has a mutation in the p53 tumour-supressor gene (which is very common in many cancers).   

       There are very few drugs that can work on this p53 mutation, and none are in routine use yet. But there is one (APR-246, also called PRIMA-1) which looks really good. It covalantly binds to mutant p53, and forces it to fold correctly (despite its mutation), thereby re-activating it. So, this alone kills cancer cells because they finally get the "die!!" message that's relayed via p53.   

       What's more (and by a truly fantastic coincidence), the same compound _also_ makes cancer cells more susceptible to platinum-based chemotherapy. Usually, chemo only works for a few months or a year; then the cancer cells adapt by making more glutathione, which protects them against the chemotherapy agent. But APR-246 screws up glutathione. So, you can restore chemo-sensitivity to chemo-resistant tumours.   

       APR-246 has gone through phase1 and phase2 trials for some cancers with p53 mutations (especially ovarian). It's a well- tolerated drug and performs well, alone or in combination with chemo. Trials against lung cancer don't start until later this year (and I'm in the wrong country anyway), but the drug does work against lung cancer cells in vitro, so it's worth a shot.   

       You can buy APR-246 for research purposes, but a 3-day course would cost about £150,000. But I've ordered a bespoke synthesis from a Chinese biotech firm - £1M worth of the stuff (100 grams!) for £12,000. That's not insane, because it's an easy synthesis from a cheapish precursor. Just hoping they can do it within 4 weeks and get it right!
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 24 2020

       That’s really interesting - so this is cutting edge cancer research? I hope you manage to get a top journal paper out of it (and zap your cancer).
hippo, Feb 24 2020

       Yep - it's pretty new. Alas, a single self-experiment won't get published, but it'll be interesting. I'm assuming that I'm not breaking any laws (since it's self-treatment and it's not a banned substance) but, frankly, who cares?
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 24 2020

       What do you mean, won't get published? You'll write the results here, won't you? That counts as published. And we, your peers, will review what you have written. That counts as peer-reviewed.   

       And the Halfbakery counts as a prestigious journal of record by any sane reckoning.
pocmloc, Feb 24 2020

       // the Halfbakery counts as a prestigious journal of record by any sane reckoning //   

       Whoa, [poc] how come you never let on that you're an alien species too ? Good to meet you. Aren't these humans just hilarious ?   

       Have you come far ? What's the climate like on your home planet ?
8th of 7, Feb 24 2020

       I'll go along with that.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 24 2020

       Ignore him, everyone, that's just the meds talking...
8th of 7, Feb 24 2020

       Yep, the second paracetamol is always a bit chatty.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 24 2020

       This sounds very promising. I may even have to send you more Tayto Cheese and Onion crisps to refill your soggy crisp drying apparatus!
xenzag, Feb 24 2020

       //Halfbakery counts as a prestigious journal//
Given the calibre of the netizens here, halfbakery review is probably a step or 2 ABOVE "ordinary" scientific journal peer review.
Great news on the experimentation progress, too. I'm not a biologist by any measure, so I won't pretend to understand much of your description; but yay, science!
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 24 2020

       The first thing that you could try to do, is to define what you are (define your self, to allow others re-run you within them.) I mean, everyone of us is a bit different kind of random process. Think what's special to being you? Well, for example, what does your search process look like? What were you like as a kid? Oh, btw., I have a few questions before you go -- http://curiosity.mindey.com . You may want to answer some of them publicly here if you like.   

       Next, cancer prevention and treatment... I have been collecting links about various novel ways of treatment "just in case". I'll try to look up, and maybe using tool like http://dynalist.io (it's way better than workflowy) we could organize a systematic collaborative public editing (such editing is supported) process to distill what could be useful to deal with this.   

       And a few more thoughts -- (1) organism is a set of interacting processes, and as long as those processes fulfill their functions to produce required material and information flows, we are alive, let's look for bottlenecks in the organism's flows graph and ways to alleviate them, (2) "A house is made of bricks and beams. A home is made of love and dreams." -- could we make HB community into a kind of home?   

       Finally, it's heart breaking to read this, [Max]. I don't want to see you in that list along [bristolz]. So, all hopes in your recovery. And, not saying farewell just yet. In hopes that against all odds, you do recover and are well.
Mindey, Feb 25 2020

       . Well said, Mindey. I hadn't thought of bristolz until now. What they say is true, as long as your name is spoken you're not really gone.
reensure, Feb 25 2020

       And [Max] - sorry, more questions - is there a test you can do on the stuff from China to see if they’ve sent you the right thing, and is there a before/after test you can do on yourself to see if it’s doing anything?
hippo, Feb 25 2020

       // Given the calibre of the netizens here //   

       What's the average, though ? At the top end, yes, the 80cm "Schwerer Gustav", but at the bottom end a nerf gun with a broken spring ...
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020

       //What's the average, though?//

Mean or median? - I suspect a very skewed data set...
hippo, Feb 25 2020

       //is there a test you can do on the stuff// Max dons his guinea pig suit, as he is the test!
xenzag, Feb 25 2020

       It's certainly not going to be a Gaussian distribution.
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020

       Oh shit, I'm so sorry [MB].
nineteenthly, Feb 25 2020

       //it's heart breaking to read this// Nah, fuck that. This is a fight. And everyone likes a good fight.   

       //a test you can do on the stuff from China // Yes, I'm trying to line up someone to do NMR on a sample. I'll also see what QC data the Chinese send (if I can trust it).   

       //before/after test// That's the tricky bit. Obviously, there's whether I feel better or worse, but that's slow and subjective. Really need PET scans before and after (or even CT, at a pinch). I'll have "before" scans as part of my NHS treatment; tricky thing will be to explain that I've tried something radical and need "after" scans too. On the other hand, I can always just pay for scans privately.   

       //Oh shit, I'm so sorry// You took the words right out of my mouth, [19thly]. Thanks.   

       But, two pieces of news:
(1) I'm booked in for my first chemo session, a week this Thursday if nothing goes wrong. I never thought I'd look forward to being on chemo, but hey.
(2) I have a new and interesting lump in one armpit, which can serve as a convenient indicator for the chemo's effectiveness.

       Oh and, (3) A team of trained wallabies delivered me a box full of edibles and drinkables to nourish both body and soul. [Ubie], you are a gent.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020

       HB synchronised international crossed fingers (and toes) proposed for that day.
xenzag, Feb 25 2020

       [Mindey], what sage advice and directions to explore. I am of the school of Ayurvedic Medicine, and Reiki Healing. I share their belief that long ago emotional trauma resides in our bodies and is the culprit behind most diseases and illnesses.   

       If indeed, people are open to that philosophy, there are so many treatments and avenues we can offer up and share with our dear MB.   

       My daughter is a Master's level teacher of Ayurvedic Medicine. The well of her knowledge is endless.   

       But you, [Mindey], are the first to really mention an alternative medical approach that is in fact more spiritual healing than symptomatic efforts.   

       We always head immediately for the somatic option, when the soul is going to do what the soul is destined to do, no matter what we do.   

       Ok, end of thought dump number ninety here. We have become a community of support for a baker that has given so much of himself to this site. For that, I am grateful asl always, to jutta.
blissmiss, Feb 25 2020

       Sync it for Thursday week. I think the first chemo is make or break, since either it does nothing (OK) or it wipes out a huge mass of cancer cells. In the latter case there's a flood of crap into the system and, I guess, a chance of internal bleeds (not sure about that last part, but you can't destroy a pound of flesh without some consequences).
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020

       Added link COLLABORATIVE EDITING: "Strategies for Saving Max," because... Hierarchies are helpful to address issues systematically.   

       It is editable by anyone, so, there's a risk of loss of information by an error, but anyone is free to back it up or set up a cron job to do it periodically. So, feel free to edit.   

       Prepending your username at the line of editing may be helpful. Tab/Shift-Tab conveniently idents/un-indents. I'll be back later today, to try to add some of the things from my notes.   

       [blissmiss], thanks for the kind words. Actually, I was intending my suggestions to be practical, though, I do believe that a person who knows oneself well enough, one can distill the essence of what he or she is in a definition. A practical definition, that's like those particular constants of physics in our particular universe, that gives birth to particular kind of life.
Mindey, Feb 25 2020

       [Maxwell] it is not too late to take up the banjo if you have not already. It is endlessly rewarding, and the cheers of applause from your hospital bedmates will fill your soul with delight.
tatterdemalion, Feb 25 2020

       [tatterdemalion] - I am already highly proficient on the banjo. I have been trying hard to lose, rather than enhance, this unwanted gift.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020

       [tat], were you a kamikaze pilot in a former exisance, or are you channeling Dr. Kevorkian ? Because playing the banjo in a room full of sick people is at best going to involve you in needing immediate surgical intervention to remove the banjo, and quite possibly leave you with a colostomy to add to your existing problems.
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020

       The cheers of applause come when you stop playing. No mountains without valleys and all that. But enough of being facetious, obviously the prime choice of instrument for health care facilities is the bassoon.
tatterdemalion, Feb 25 2020

       //playing the banjo in a room full of sick people is at best going to involve you in needing // - quite right; The only proper instrument to play in those circumstances is the bagpipes, or maybe the accordion.
hippo, Feb 25 2020

       At the Dignitas clinic, yes, undoubtedly.   

       // when you stop playing //   

       We wish to point out that while starting to play would be a volitional act, ceasing to play would most likely not be.
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020

       Still laughing from //.. I have just sent £12K to a Chinese restaurant .. //   

       Now, to contend with the thought of a bassoon ensemble.   

       Still, possibly better than whale sounds. :-)
reensure, Feb 25 2020

       It's also notoriously difficult to organize a whale ensemble around a hospital bed.   

       Speaking of which, _everybody_ should get a hospital bed. It's awesome. It can go up. It can go down. It can tilt head-up. It can tilt head-down. The head part can go up. The - well, you get the idea. It's brilliant.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020

       // contend with the thought of a bassoon ensemble //   

       Not much to contend with. There aren't many pieces scored just for bassoon, although woodwind quartets are WKTE. There are different ranges,{(A1) B&#9837;1–C5 (D5–G5)} so although the pitch will be generally be low the span will be quite useable with some minor re-scoring.   

       We contend that one or more bassoonists playing their instruments are relatively unlikely to provoke immediate physical violence, at least not in the way that an accordion does.
8th of 7, Feb 25 2020

       I would like there to be a bassoon and banjo ensemble, playing whale-song inspired compositions
pocmloc, Feb 25 2020

       I tried very hard to get hold of Bundaberg Rum but your backward heathen liquor vendors no longer stock it, it would seem. Instead, you had to settle for some sort of “premium” Filipino brew.   

       I hope it brings you some small joy, as there is precious fucking little of that left in the world these days.   

       I am also very gratified to see the package made it to you, despite being addressed to your alter-ego business enterprise, Rentisham’s Wax Emporium. I rather wondered how the delivery-wallah would handle that one.
UnaBubba, Feb 25 2020

       They were very perceptive wallabies. I hope they make the return journey safely.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 25 2020

       // contend with the thought of a bassoon ensemble //   

       Naturally, misread as "Baboon ensemble". Had to go back and figure out where the apes came from. Duh.
blissmiss, Feb 25 2020

       Hmm... baboons playing bassoons. They've definitely got the lips for it.
Not sure how to smuggle them (OR the bassoons) into a hospital ward...
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 26 2020

       //you get the idea. It's brilliant.//

That is what I was like when I first used a stand-up workstation desk. Desk goes up. Desk goes down. Desk goes up. Desk goes down. Hours of endless fun. Then the button broke. :(

Scarey stuff with the chemo, Max. Stay strong mate.
DrBob, Feb 26 2020

       //everybody_ should get a hospital bed. It's awesome. It can go up. It can go down.//   

       I heard the modern adjustable hospital bed was invented by Howard Hughes after he crashed a prototype fighter plane he designed.   

       Let me verify that...
doctorremulac3, Feb 26 2020

doctorremulac3, Feb 26 2020

       //get a hospital bed//   

       Should we take it from this that you're still an in-patient, or that you've acquired a hospital bed for your home, [Max]?
pertinax, Feb 26 2020

       No, I'm home - hospital bed provided courtesy of the NHS :-)
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 26 2020


       In Morocco at the mo, will try to see you..
not_morrison_rm, Feb 27 2020

       You'll need bloody good binoculars mate.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 27 2020

       (and a low-Earth-orbit mirror)
hippo, Feb 27 2020

       This whole thread is why I love HB.   

       Friendship, sarcasm, love, science, engineering, networking, thought-provoking.   

       I'd bun that.
jonthegeologist, Feb 27 2020

       Plus, [jonthegeologist], if it all goes bear-shaped I'll be counting on you for advice on how best to be fossilised.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 27 2020

       [MaxwellBuchanan]; I just got a reply from my friend; no go I'm afraid. It was definitely worth a try, though.
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 28 2020

       Ah well, thanks for asking!
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 28 2020

       Today the word of the day on dictionary.com is intercalary.
Of course, we all knew what that meant already, but now the rest of the world has no excuse either.
Loris, Feb 29 2020

       There was a difficult period just after the intercalary was born, when we didn't know he was going to be intercalary. During that time we just had to call him "him".
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 29 2020

       Well, that's better than "it"
pocmloc, Feb 29 2020

       He's still holding out for a name transplant; the last donor fell through, but there's always a chance. I did say he could have "Maxwell" if things went wrong, but he refuses to countenance it. I suspect he's worried that the lawsuits would just gravitate toward him.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 29 2020

       Can he not just get a fake birth certificate on the black market?
pocmloc, Feb 29 2020

       He could, but he says he wants a real name that he can call his own.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 29 2020

       One of these days I'll take some time to get a better grasp of the expanded [MaxwellBuchanan] cinematic universe.
tatterdemalion, Mar 01 2020

       None of it's canon.
pertinax, Mar 01 2020

       I meant a fake real one. I know he already collects real fakes and fake fakes.
pocmloc, Mar 01 2020

       And now for something completely different. I was watching a documentary about Monty Python and one Python member? vestige? mentioned the difference between the Cambridge and Oxford sense of humour. I wonder how much of Max's quickwittedness is Cambridge related?   

       It's funny, because the first Pilgrims to the U.S. were said to have hailed from the Cambridge area, and Bostonians are such inveterate crackers, it's almost addictive.
4and20, Mar 02 2020

       This all makes me think why the artificial blood isn't yet a thing with its immune system. Could be a good alternative to cryonics, for a rather lengthy time... If we could reverse engineer the effects of all those other organs, that are required to recycle blood that is... Could we get certain proteins needed in the blood be manufactured by bacteria instead of liver? I bet we could, it's just time.
Mindey, Mar 02 2020

       I think, Mindey, you'd be quite comfortable with artificial organs. I believe with scaffolding and germ cells to build upon, much is possible.   

       Distributed funny bones?
reensure, Mar 02 2020

       Well, on the plus side, today I got the go-ahead for chemotherapy starting on Thursday. No immuno for me, alas - not quite well enough for that. On the minus side I am feeling pretty ropey generally. But back on the plus side, that means that chemo won't seem so bad.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 02 2020

       Positive vibes sent. That's the vague humming sound you can hear if you rest your head against a wooden telegraph pole.
xenzag, Mar 02 2020

       That's odd. I always thought the humming sound was coming from my head.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 02 2020

       [Max] do hold on buddy -- at this point you AT LEAST need to hang around to confirm if coronavirus will end civilization as we know it
theircompetitor, Mar 02 2020

       Civilization as we knew it, ended, roughly around 2001. This post-period era we're now in is known to time-travelers simply as 'The Descent.'
RayfordSteele, Mar 02 2020

       Had they considered adaptive growth control when doing chemotherapy? I.e., target those parts of cancer, that are creating bottlenecks first, don't overload organism with huge doses. E.g., target first those places, where growth creates a risk of blocking info-metabolic pathways.   

       Also, there has been a paper, exploring evolutionary approach saying "Can we learn to live with--rather than kill--cancer? A new study suggests that frequent, low-dose chemotherapy that keeps tumor growth under control may be more effective than standard high-dose chemotherapy that seeks to eradicate cancer cells completely." (link)
Mindey, Mar 02 2020

       Thanks for that paper, [mindey] - I can see the sense of it. One snag is that it'll take a lot of clinical experience, over years, to figure out the most effective "management strategy"; in contrast, a "kill them all" approach at least has clear-cut short-term objectives and observables.   

       Right now, I just want my cancer knocked back enough to let me feel better for a while. I think the early issues I was experiencing (like cancer-induced blood clots) are under control now, but I'm now reaching the point where the sheer bulk of cancer cells and their screwed-up metabolism is making me feel like crap. Every system is degrading slightly, with the possible exceptions of my teeth (hunky dory) and fingernails.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 02 2020

       // but I'm now reaching the point where the sheer bulk of cancer cells and their screwed-up metabolism is making me feel like crap //   

       Hold on, Max. Suggest doctors be as targeted and smart as possible, about management and targeting. When feeling better is just blocking a few neural pathways and providing quality blood to the brain, it's tempting to think of filters, that through smart filtering could make animal blood usable as one's own. Heck, I wonder, how could we use Zika virus-like phenomena to grow brain-less clones of ourselves (not like in the cases of Zika, where there is still brain left, but without forming any higher functions at all), and stockpile bodies for quality blood...
Mindey, Mar 02 2020

       Is there a binding site at the mutation of the cancer cells, that would make them susceptible to a specific viral infection? Chemo is so indiscriminate.
Mindey, Mar 02 2020

       Most of the newer treatments are indeed more targetted than chemo. However, my cancer lacks most "targettable" mutations.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 02 2020

       You need a bit of a brain to control metabolism.
Voice, Mar 02 2020

       Hi Max. Just checking in. If you are starting the chemo tomorrow you will be feeling pretty crap soon (well, even more crap than you have been) but hang on in there guv. The mental battle is as important as the physical one. Just keep on keeping on!
DrBob, Mar 04 2020

       Yep, chemo in T minus 20 hours and counting. To be realistic, it'll probably be fine on the day (I hear it takes a day or two to feel the effects) and I'm just being melodramatic.   

       Anyone here had chemo, or know anyone who has? I'm hoping it'll make me feel better once the immediate side effects are over, but I guess it's unlikely to make a big difference that fast.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 04 2020

       This is a slightly convoluted theory, but it may help to make certain you're getting enough sunlight and/or Vitamin D. A researcher at Harvard has been doing a multidecade observational study of Vitamin D and mentioned that scientists have known since the 70's that people around the equator get 30% fewer cases of some cancers.   

       One immunology book also mentions that 80% of cancers begin in the epithelium. Our skin is of course our largest organ.   

       There may also be some relationship between lower sunlight and Covid-19, in my decidedly nonscientific theorizing. Look at a map of where the virus has been most deadly and it's mostly restricted to a band of colder and/or more overcast climates...
4and20, Mar 04 2020

       My best friend had two doses of Cisplatin and he had a rough time, but came out the other side. He also had 42 radiation sessions (throat cancer) That was 7 years ago and he's fine now. ie cancer free. He has some teeth and jaw issues, but the cancer is gone. Yours can be gone too Max. No matter how bad it is and what stage it's at, people do get better. Not everyone does, but a lot do. I believe in those positive vibes. Get your head against that pole.... :-)
xenzag, Mar 04 2020

       // it's mostly restricted to a band of colder and/or more overcast climates... //   

       Scotchland ... but that's not because of virulence, it's because the inhabitants have lost the will to live.   

       Scotchland will do that to anyone ... or any thing. Quite a lot of the native species are migratory, because they can't stand the place all year round.
8th of 7, Mar 04 2020

       Hey, [xen], thanks. Yes, I do believe I can beat both the odds and this cancer. Tomorrow will be the first step in actually hitting the cancer rather than firefighting complications. Once I turn the corner on this one there'll be no stopping me.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 04 2020

       If it is now t <20 hours, look up that fasting reducing the side effects of chemotherapy, and making it more effective thing. It sounds annoying but not eating during that first day or two before the chemotherapy symptoms start could be a less crummy time to fast.
beanangel, Mar 04 2020

       Well, you'll have to argue with Mrs. MaxwellBuchanan over that one. She doesn't believe in fasting and, given that I can only eat about two mouthsfull of anything, she has been urging food upon me practically non-stop.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 04 2020

       I understand chemo symptoms can be very varied and very odd. My father had chemo and his symptom was not being able to touch cold water. Couldn't be outside in the rain, couldn't drink tap water from a glass. Wore off after a day, but returned a week later with the next course.
pocmloc, Mar 04 2020

       Now that _is_ wierd. I hope I get something interesting like that.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 04 2020

       I know someone who could levitate rubber bath- plugs by pointing at them with both index fingers at once. Once the chemo wore off we could all bath again without fear.
xenzag, Mar 04 2020

       [Max], take care. What treatment protocol are you about to be subjected to exactly? Pardon if you mentioned it already. Is it possible to take large number of tiny samples of your cancer, and subject them to a variety of substances to see how it fares in comparison to normal cells? I wonder...
Mindey, Mar 04 2020

       I'll be on two different chemos (I've got a note of them somewhere...). It'd be nice to have "bespoke" drugs tested on my very own cancer, but I don't think that's a noption.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 04 2020

       // I've got a note of them somewhere... //   

       Share if you can, the very specific process is going to help us understand better what you are going to be going through.
Mindey, Mar 04 2020

       It's Permetrexed and Carboplatin. The Carboplatin means that my scrap metal value ought to increase.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 04 2020

       Carboplatin and Pemetrexed have no known interactions with light drinking. Might be helpful.
whatrock, Mar 05 2020

       High hopes & best wishes, [Max].   

       (This chemotherapy thing has always seemed to me a most half-baked idea. Find something that's deadly, but twice as deadly for the cancer as it is for you, and then half-way kill you with it.   

       You'll probably feel like crap for a while, it's pretty much a given; just don't give up. Desertion is *not* the better part of valor.)
lurch, Mar 05 2020

       I'm securing my bath plug down with waterproof tape in case of a long range levitation episode. I'll know it was you Max :-)
xenzag, Mar 05 2020

       Are you combining chemo with your mystery Chinese drug?
hippo, Mar 05 2020

       Thinking of you today, and sending love and pretend flowers. Hang in there and come see the loonies in the bin, as soon as you are feeling up to it. We'll continue to play amongst our elves while you re-coop.
blissmiss, Mar 05 2020

       Hang in there [MB]. I'll be broaching an imaginary bottle of Mouton Rothschild '45 later.
DenholmRicshaw, Mar 05 2020

       If it's imaginary, how will you know if it's corked?
hippo, Mar 05 2020

       It's not. I checked.
pertinax, Mar 05 2020

       Oh, OK
hippo, Mar 05 2020

blissmiss, Mar 05 2020

       //Are you combining chemo with your mystery Chinese drug?// Not yet - still 2-4 weeks for delivery. But I'll add it later. It's got good synergy with the chemo drugs, so I'm hoping for good things. Step 1, though, is to get through enough of the chemo to start feeling a little better.   

       Thanks to everyone for the good wishes. Chemo will probably turn out to be an anticlimax, in that (a) it probably won't make me feel as lousy as I'm expecting and (b) it'll probably take at least several days to have any perceptible impact on the cancer. I expect I'll check in tonight, but don't worry if I can't.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 05 2020

       // my scrap metal value ought to increase.//   

       Will there be a bidding process or is it first come first served ? Group 10 metals, particularly noble metals, aren't usually retained by the body... the metabolites are ezcreted quite rapidly.   

       This may actually confer significant value on your excretions; no need, for example, to apply any gold leaf...   

       We'll just leave it there for now, while everyone else has a chance to consider the implications....
8th of 7, Mar 05 2020

       Wait, is that your night or USA night, or hmmm, aren't you usually up at all hours anyway? Will be watching for your thumbs up. (Which it will be).
blissmiss, Mar 05 2020

       // it probably won't make me feel as lousy as I'm expecting//

Well that's disappointing. This isn't the show that I was promised! CanI have my money back please?
DrBob, Mar 05 2020

       Well, I am now back from Chemo Round 1. I have to say it was less dramatic than expected, with nobody shouting "Code Red - get the paddles". Just three hours in a comfy chair being plumbed into a succession of drips. Any immediate feeling of crapness is just due to the steroids and other stuff they pre-loaded me with, plus the fact that I've now got two litres of additional fluid trying to find a place to go.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 05 2020

       “feeling of crapness ... now got two litres of additional fluid trying to find a place to go” - are you sure you didn’t just spend the afternoon at the pub?
hippo, Mar 05 2020

       Pretty sure, alas. I did ask if they could run an extra bag with some gin in it, but no dice.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 05 2020

       No booze, no gambling either ? Sounds like a Methodist meeting. Did you have to sing hymns ?   

       // "Code Red - get the paddles". //   

       That sounds like an excerpt from "A Few Good Men" where "Code Red" was shorthand for a "correctional" beating-up administered to the victim by fellow servicemen.   

       Oh, and what [DrBob] said. We didn't tune in for this disappointing anticlimax; we want our streaming subscription refunded, unless the second episode is rated PG at the very least. None of this "Mild violence, mild peril, some bad language" bollocks.
8th of 7, Mar 05 2020

       Some methods of raising your sats may be contraindicated. In the meantime, if necessary, we can send [8th] a YouTube playlist of strafing gun-camera video, or some seal-clubbing documentary footage, or something. You just get comfortable, and... just a second, how do you do sunshine therapy in the UK? Snuggle up to the big screen and watch something filmed in the Sahara?
lurch, Mar 05 2020

       The usual way is to go and sit close* to one of the older nuclear power plants ...   

       *not too close.
8th of 7, Mar 05 2020

       // "Code Red - get the paddles". //   

       No no no - it's code red - open the bottle of Chateau Palmer 1961.
DenholmRicshaw, Mar 05 2020

       I haven't checked that one yet.
pertinax, Mar 05 2020

       //ask if they could run an extra bag with some gin in it, but no dice//   

       Ha! that's because they can't prescribe gin. I know for a fact* that they can prescribe Guinness and whiskey. I also know for a fact that even senior oncologists can be worn down by drawn out stubborn arguments with some evidence. Demand whiskey, then refer to the large whiteboard where you've helpfully drawn out the whole of known metabolism. Start with "Something something Warburg, something, something, ethanol, acetaldehyde (uM concentrations, less important than most thing) acetate, in mM concentrations as a non-glycolytic substrate disadvantageous to neoplasia, something, something, acetate causes huge upregulation of acetylation, somewhat combating the increases HDAC activity, something, something". If that doesn't work, bribe a porter.   

       *knowlege correct circa 2006
bs0u0155, Mar 06 2020

       One down, a few more to go. Good way to kick some chemo ass, youngin.
blissmiss, Mar 06 2020

       // how do you do sunshine therapy in the UK?/   


       In the C19th, many humane and forward-thinking judges included prescriptions for sunshine therapy* when sentencing a wide range of offenders, from cockney burglars to Irish nationalists. Hence, Australia.   

       *Other therapies included penal servitude and flogging.
pertinax, Mar 06 2020

       Dammit, I'm turning into [8th]. How did that happen?
pertinax, Mar 06 2020

       // how do you do sunshine therapy in the UK?/   

       Ultraviolet sun lamps exist. I've asked if people use them in Sweden, but it seems as if they're more focused on practicing oncology expertise. You have to turn them off or draw the shades for self-flogging anyway.
4and20, Mar 06 2020

       A possible breakthrough in therapies in this Jewish Mag. See linky. Just give those lungs a little scrub and then replace them into the body, all sparkling clean.
blissmiss, Mar 06 2020

       Hmmm. Well, one problem is that my cancer has decided to grow weirdly and is sort of diffuse, rather than being in one spot where it could be resected. It's also having a party in all my lymph nodes.   

       Or at least it was until now. It is now (I hope) writhing in agony as it dies under the onslaught of the finest chemotherapeutic agents available to mankind. Kapow! Take that!
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 06 2020

       //Ha! that's because they can't prescribe gin.//   

       Not quite so. Last time I was in hospital, nice old ladies would come around with a trolley serving coffee, tea, hot chocolate and fruit juice every few hours.   

       Once, a trolley came around pushed by a more cheerful and younger lady. To my utter astonishment, it had gin, whisky, vodka, wine... Once I'd established that I wasn't dreaming, it turned out that this was completely legitimate, on the grounds that a modicum of alcohol was good for the appetite and mood.   

       Tragically, it turned out that I was on the no-fly list for alcohol (kidneys not up to scratch). But almost...
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 06 2020

       // Dammit, I'm turning into [8th]. How did that happen? //   

       We are experimenting will a kinder, gentler, more subtle form of Assimilation.   

       Dammit, did we just say that ?   

       <Frantically reviews list of recently Assimilated drones/>
8th of 7, Mar 06 2020

       Ah, living dangerously, eh ?
8th of 7, Mar 06 2020

       Incidentally, after my chemo yesterday I was sent home with a long list of new drugs to take. One of them was Dom Perignon, which I was quite pleased about until I discovered that it's actually an anti-nausea drug called Domperidone.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 06 2020

       \\One of them was Dom Perignon\\   

       We really do need to work on those drug names.   

       When I'm old, befuddled and hopefully, still solvent, I want to be able to sign something that allows administration of Chateau Margaux '61.   

       Not that imaginary one.
DenholmRicshaw, Mar 06 2020

       I've been to the pub   

       ... and all is well...   


       One of my drinking buddies admitted to ...manscaping...   

       [MB] - a few moments with a shaver; show those carers/wives/significant others a thing or two...
DenholmRicshaw, Mar 06 2020

       Fortunately I've still got two.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 06 2020

       OK, I can now state that chemo takes about 48 hours to kick in.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 07 2020

       Hoping you are ok. We knew it was going a little too good. Feel better.
blissmiss, Mar 07 2020

       The word is "bleughh".
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 07 2020

       It's a pity entanglement isn't at the personal level. All halfbakers could feel a little worst so you [Max] can get through the chemo that little easier.
wjt, Mar 07 2020

       Yea! Hell yea!   

       (For the milestone, not the feeling lousy.)
doctorremulac3, Mar 07 2020

       // All halfbakers could feel a little worst //   

       We are fully prepared to feel a little wurst* on [MB]'s behalf.   

       If [xen] can be made to feel a lot worse for the same good cause, that will be even better.   


       *A type of german sausage, and absolutely not a euphemism for anything else whatsoever.
8th of 7, Mar 07 2020

       Thanks, all of you, for the good wishes. And especially, [CH] for pointing out that I've made it a month. I am, in all honesty, feeling completely crap both physically and mentally. But, fuck it. Tomorrow is another day. I'm going to take a generous dose of oxycodone and head for bed.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 07 2020

       Curious is "Wurst" a night or day sausage? To MB, have a sweet albeit opiate-induced sleep.
blissmiss, Mar 08 2020

       "G'night Max. We'll be here for ya in the morning.
doctorremulac3, Mar 08 2020

       Morining Max, rise & shine, albeit slowly & reluctantly! It's time to continue living for another day!

If it helps, just imagine me a as a drill seargeant mercilessly bullying a reluctant national service recruit. Now then, it's time for some marching up & down the square!
DrBob, Mar 08 2020

       //"Something something Warburg, something, something, ethanol, acetaldehyde (uM concentrations, less important than most thing) acetate, in mM concentrations as a non-glycolytic substrate disadvantageous to neoplasia, something, something, acetate causes huge upregulation of acetylation, somewhat combating the increases HDAC activity, something, something". If that doesn't work, bribe a porter. //   

       You are my new mentor.
Voice, Mar 08 2020

       Is albeit not Kosher, Dr. B? I haven't heard it in a while.
blissmiss, Mar 08 2020

       It is for people wot like to speak proper English.
DrBob, Mar 08 2020

       Any better today? Hope so. Good thoughts your way.
blissmiss, Mar 09 2020

       Be sure to hop over to the "Simple Answer Search Engine" post. Mirth and merriment a plenty.   

       Remember: "He who laughs laughs, laughs laughs."
doctorremulac3, Mar 09 2020

       // If that doesn't work, bribe a porter. //   

       ... if you can find one.
8th of 7, Mar 09 2020

       [MaxwellBuchanan], how goes the chemo today? More importantly (I suppose), how's the response to the chemo?
neutrinos_shadow, Mar 09 2020

       [MB] I just read that at mice administration of metformin reduces cognetive impariment caused by cisplatin in mice at 100 mg/Kg. I also read that to calculate a human dose from a mouse study you divide by 12.6, so a 70 Kg human would take 556 mg of metformin, that is much less than the 2000 mg per day human diabetics take, which is also a longevity increasing dose I read about once. If you look up "metformin without prescription" you can get some online in 3-5 days (1001pills.com [link]), or, although it takes longer it is only $75-80/Kg on alibaba.com
beanangel, Mar 10 2020

       [[waves hand]]
blissmiss, Mar 10 2020

       Is anybody deputized to go in and check on him when he stops... whatever?
lurch, Mar 10 2020

       He's undergoing chemo which I understand is pretty challenging. I doubt he's feeling very social.
doctorremulac3, Mar 10 2020

       Yes, what doctorremulac3 said. Still, it doesn't hurt to let him know we are still thinking of him, so I would encourage people to keep posting on this thread.
DrBob, Mar 10 2020

       Yes, I agree, Dr. B. When feeling better he'll be able to look back and it will make his heart warm, and his brain will release serotonin which is a natural healing agent.
blissmiss, Mar 10 2020

       Eeew! Sounds icky! I'm not sure I'd want a load of serotonin dribbling out of my ears.
DrBob, Mar 10 2020

       But they do make a thing called a Seratonin Re-Uptake Inhibitor, which, I guess, would keep the serotonin from soaking into your pillow if you smear the stuff on properly.
lurch, Mar 10 2020

       Trouble is, you can always spot an SSRI user by their impromptu mohican.   

       Unless they shave all the hair off their head, of course. Then you can spot them by the patches of random stuff sticking to their scalp ...
8th of 7, Mar 10 2020

       //it doesn't hurt to let him know we are still thinking of him, so I would encourage people to keep posting on this thread.//   


       We're thinking of you Max.
doctorremulac3, Mar 10 2020

       //We're thinking of you Max.//   

       Yes... but not in any stalkerish kind of way. More of a wishing there was some way to help kind of way.
It's just not the same poker game without ya making sure I'm not bluffing [MB].

       Don't make me dredge up some of my less believable not-so-tall tales...   

       There is a gentle knock at the door.   

       [MB] looks up from his nest of tubes to see a bashful sasquatch proffering a "Get Well Soon" card.
pertinax, Mar 11 2020

       The other cryptids are waiting outside, making faint snuffling noises.
pertinax, Mar 11 2020

       What a serene visual, pert. Yes...It's a good day for stillness and warmness to send kindness and get better wishes. Be well, MB.
blissmiss, Mar 11 2020

       I'll cross reference chemotherapy, gluose starvation, acetylation, and lactic acidosis, beanangel. Assuming we'd like our patient to have a fully functioning sense of humor, you may be on to something! :)
reensure, Mar 11 2020

       Already mentioned but might as well mention it again, if you have any .5b ideas in notebooks dust them off and post them, keeping the place lively might be something everybody, including [MB] likes
beanangel, Mar 12 2020

       //to see a bashful sasquatch//   

       Sasquatch ain't the half of it.
Honestly, not only has every one of the not-so-tall tales I've told here been true... but I've only burdened you folks with the bits I figured you all might be able to deal with.

       The true things I haven't told are far more out-there than the things I've disclosed.
S'truth. <shrugs>

       Either way. Paul grilling me looking for inconsistencies in my little stories and holding me to task are things I have looked forward to, and plan to look forward to looking forward to again.
The man will give me credit for telling it like it is and there's no going anywhere til I get my due.

       Sorry the chemo is going to suck so much.   

Later when we meet, we can laugh about it over a pint.

       Until then, stiff upper lip and all that.   

       May today be better and may your body heal.
blissmiss, Mar 12 2020

       Max, hope you are well. It's really concerning to see you not respond for so long.   

       // I'm going to take a generous dose of oxycodone and head for bed.   

       In all of my heart I'm hoping you, despite the scary time gap (link), are all well. Recommend to track your vitals at all times. I suppose, chemo procedure involves taking preventative measures for all the risks, and we are not hearing from you just because of you being in the hospital, undergoing treatments, being well taken care of.
Mindey, Mar 12 2020

       Thinking of you, Max. Sending positive vibes south.
calum, Mar 12 2020

       We're all thinking of you and wishing you well Max.
doctorremulac3, Mar 12 2020

       //Sending positive vibes south// - just to point out that you could send them north too, but they'd take longer to get to him
hippo, Mar 12 2020

       You'll vibes the high road and I'll vibes the low road and I'll vibe in Max town afore ye
calum, Mar 12 2020

       With apologies to, well, everyone
calum, Mar 12 2020

       Hope you are sticking with us, Max. Good thoughts coming your way.
DrBob, Mar 12 2020

       Hi all, I haven't seen many of you in quite some time and I wish I was reappearing with better news.   

       Maxwell Buchanan AKA Dr Paul Dear passed away yesterday. The news came via his solicitor and I don't have any more detail than that.   

       Much as this saddens me, I can't help but feel that he truly made the most of his life in every way, and that is as much as any of us can do. I salute him for that.
wagster, Mar 12 2020

       god dammit.   

theircompetitor, Mar 12 2020

       Ah no. I'm so sorry to hear that. Sympathy for his lovely family. This is a terrible loss. I really believed he could make it somehow....
xenzag, Mar 12 2020

xaviergisz, Mar 12 2020

       Oh no. No. I was so hoping for a different way for this to go. To his family, what can I say? You know how much he will be missed here. And in his "real" life.   

       Tears don't do this sadness justice. I want to kick something that resembles cancer right now.   

       Goodbye, dear friend. You are already missed.
blissmiss, Mar 12 2020

       I'm glad to have had the privilege of sharing this space with Max. Of exchanging ideas; of winding him up about GMs; of enjoying his very British creative humour. Being rewarded with his approval for any of the ideas I posted always meant the most to me. I hope his ideas remain here as an inspiration to us all and those who come along in the future. Farewell Max. The best.
xenzag, Mar 12 2020

Sgt Teacup, Mar 12 2020

RayfordSteele, Mar 12 2020

jonthegeologist, Mar 12 2020

       Just when things seemed to be looking up :-(
You will be missed, [MaxwellBuchanan]; both here and out there in the real world.
neutrinos_shadow, Mar 12 2020

whatrock, Mar 12 2020

       //just when things seemed to be looking up//   

       Max would have appreciated the absurd irony of that statement on a day like today.
theircompetitor, Mar 12 2020

       Fuck this universe.   

       What bothers me, is that information is not lost. Max has got encrypted by random motion of molecules, we just need to invent a way to decrypt him...   

       He obviously didn't want to die, therefore, the universe deserves a fix. The question is how.   

       // I've already created a couple of backups of myself. One is about 6ft tall and finishing her PhD. The other is my genome on a hard drive. But, as Woody Allen said about immortality "No, I want to achieve it by not dying." //   

       Max, we know that we can make another body like yours, and train with your history and thoughts patterns here. But, as you said, we need a better solution. Now, the challenge is N-orders of magnitude greater. New N-Prize?
Mindey, Mar 12 2020

       "Max has got encrypted by random motion of molecules, we just need to invent a way to decrypt him...   

       He obviously didn't want to die, therefore, the universe deserves a fix. The question is how" I support your efforts to bring the dead back to life.
beanangel, Mar 12 2020

       Sigh. Max was a brilliant and notably kind man with amazing talents and an incredible sense of humor. I'm sure Max wouldn't mind my sharing a discussion we had outside of the HB. I told him I was uncomfortable saying goodby anonymously behind a pseudonym so I put up my facebook page for a minute and he sent me his email address so I wrote him this. (This is shortened, left some stuff out.)   


       Hey Max, Doctorremulac3 here,   

       Just wanted to do a little post game review. One of the great joys of posting things on the Halfbakery was conversing with somebody not only on the other side of the world, but as far on the other side of the tracks as you can get. Someone who I deeply respected, skilled in sciences that from my perspective might as well be magic. So when I'd post an idea that would get the occasional "This is brilliant!" from you, it meant a lot to me.   

       (I'll leave most of the letter out)   

       Anyway, enjoy the accomplishments of your great life, the legacy you've given to the world with your wonderful daughter and know the world is a better place for your having been there.   

       And if I'm wrong about the whole heaven thing, save me a good seat eh?   

       Your friend,   


       Hey Doc/Dan,   

       It's really great to hear from you - I've always considered the HB to full of friends, but breaking the fourth wall makes them even friend-ier. And like you, one of the things I've enjoyed most is meeting people (again, like you) whose skills and talents are completely different to mine.   

       Cancer is an absolute fucker, no two ways about it. I've been researching it on and off for maybe 20 years, and it's only now that it makes sense - the realities of beating it are a little different from what you imagine as an academic. On the plus side, I really believe that in 50 years all cancer will be curable; and in 100 years it'll be curable with only a visit to your local physician. Just my luck (and the the luck of everybody with cancer now) to be here a few decades too early.   

       I'll save you a seat next to me if it turns out we're both wrong. I'll be the guy with the really, really surprised look on his face.   

       Cheers, and thanks, Paul/Max   


       Rest in peace brother.   

doctorremulac3, Mar 13 2020

DenholmRicshaw, Mar 13 2020

Mindey, Mar 13 2020

       // I support your efforts to bring the dead back to life.   

       The best shot we have now, is probably cryonics, what [Voice] had pointed out initially. Wondering if Max had been a subscriber for any of cryonics services.
Mindey, Mar 13 2020

       I'll be expecting my sign from the other side, by morning, btw.
blissmiss, Mar 13 2020

       Clearly the answer is to inject his DNA, (preferably edited to eliminate this particular threat), into a suitable donor stem cell or three with similar makeup. Perhaps his daughter can spare one?   

       Or failing that, some neck bolts, a jolt of lightning, a brain in a jar, and some creepy organ music.
RayfordSteele, Mar 13 2020

       . requiem
reensure, Mar 13 2020

       To anybody who knew him "irl", my deepest sympathy for times present, and envy of times past.
FlyingToaster, Mar 13 2020

dentworth, Mar 13 2020

       Finally some relief but not the way you wanted. Rest in peace.
tatterdemalion, Mar 13 2020

       The way MaxCo website's looks visually, reminds me the words by Carl Sagan - "a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam," and when you scroll, the visual effect looks like it.
Mindey, Mar 13 2020

calum, Mar 13 2020

       His loyalty and patience will be greatly missed. He had a special place for the insane.
4and20, Mar 13 2020

hippo, Mar 13 2020

DrBob, Mar 13 2020

wagster, Mar 13 2020

       The only silver lining I see here is the potential return of the most excellent Wagster. Please come back. Email me if you feel like it.
xenzag, Mar 13 2020

       This web-page is a superb memorial / elegy / wake
pocmloc, Mar 13 2020

po, Mar 13 2020

xandram, Mar 13 2020

       Agreed [xenzag], and also for so many others who have taken up other useless pastimes but have returned to pay respects for those who are now permanently unable to continue baking.   

       I've missed so many of you deeply. And the passing of MB and csea just add to the list of reasons why staying in touch can help those of us that remain, to exchange information of passings, and to grieve together. (Or in private).
blissmiss, Mar 13 2020

bhumphrys, Mar 13 2020


       At the Rentisham's HQ, trousers are being flown at half-mast.   

       A suitable tribute (partly prepared, and predicated on the usual blatant plagiarism and inept versifying that only The Great McGonagall could aspire to emulate) will be posted in due course.   

       Sadly, repeated attempts to arrange an opportunity to scare him to death by means of notably imperfect amateur piloting technique in a correspondingly notably imperfect light aircraft never came to fruition.
8th of 7, Mar 13 2020


       sad now   

Voice, Mar 13 2020

       Thank you [Xenzag], very kind of you. Good to see some familiar names here - I may pop in a little more often.
wagster, Mar 13 2020


bs0u0155, Mar 13 2020


       All thoughts and feelings expressed.
wjt, Mar 14 2020

       Oh no. I wish I hadn't been away from the bakery through this.* Reading through everything on this page for the first time today, it was scary at first, and then it looked like everything would eventually be fine, and then… nope. If only that APR-246 arrived in time, maybe it would have gone differently. (I hope it still finds a useful purpose; I don't think Max would've wanted it to go to waste. If it can be tested for quality, maybe it could reduce the cost of that upcoming human lung cancer trial.)   

       The rest of us will go on (for a while at least), and this site will continue to be one of my favorites, but it sure won't be the same.   

       I'll help in whatever way I can with a reanimation project too, but we should bear in mind Max's concern about a recreated consciousness not being the same "me" (even though that new one will feel like it is the same one)—a concern I've long had as well. The idea of physically, locally counter-entropically "decrypting" the present state of the matter that once made up a living person is the first suggestion I've heard that seems like it might satisfy that. Philosophically, that seems like an extension of the temporary death that's used in some medical procedures now—I haven't heard anybody worrying that they'll come back from that as a copy instead of the same person. I agree that this would require cryonics to be even remotely possible, though.   

       If that doesn't end up being possible and/or his body is cremated, or if there's a part that's unnecessary for either reanimation or burial or whatever else (like a bit of toenail), then maybe a small portion of him could be launched on an N-Prize flight one day.   

       He obviously didn't want this to be the end of him.   

       *I did leave an annotation on one idea sometime in the past week or two, I think. I was trying to catch up from where I'd left off (and didn't get very far), without having even glanced at the more-recently-active stuff, which I now see was unwise, and that anno probably even looked very insensitive because I hadn't said anything here. (Edit: I see now that I also added an idea, which MB annotated, as well as two links on another idea of mine. My memory isn't good for this kind of thing.)
notexactly, Mar 15 2020

       Has the little red bird turned up yet, [blissmiss]?   

       If not, he's probably just messing with you - try adding a little Dom Perignon to the bird bath - or if that's not available (because of recent panic buying), I can highly recommend the imaginary Mouton Rothschild '45.
pertinax, Mar 15 2020

       // I'll help in whatever way I can with a reanimation project too, but we should bear in mind Max's concern about a recreated consciousness not being the same "me"   

       I would put the reanimation of actual his process within the realm of plausible with the technologies in the next 100 years, if his brain has been put even to just a temperature of consumer-grade freezer, before the information-theoretic death ( as defined in Wikipedia ) has occurred. So, basically, if the neuron connections and states can be inferred from, say crystals formed in the brain during freezing or vitrification.   

       On the other hand, when it comes to the feasibility of fixing the universe, and local entropy, that may be not be in the realm of feasibility for billions of years to come (even if we get really good with quantum computers mining entropy from parallel universes)   

       If I could say something to Max before that, I'd repeat myself saying - 1) don't take full chemo, see link on "Evolutionary approach to cancer treatment," taking full chemo is gonna clog your system.. 2) Any cryonics is infinitely better than no cryonics, even having brain in standard freezer stops liquids from mixing, stops diffusion and chaos.
Mindey, Mar 15 2020

       Pert, Glad you asked. The day after I became aware there was a new Cardinal that wasn't the same as the one that hangs around here. I stood and stared him down for a moment, and tried to see some sign. Nothing, I turned to walk back to the stove and then the really loud and almost like shouting birdcall started. And it was staring directly at me, not the other birds on the feeder. I just stood and stared. I have not seen it again since. I was brewing tea so I couldn't go out   

       He flew away and that is the God's honest truth. I swear on my beautiful daughter's life. And I have never done that before.
blissmiss, Mar 15 2020

       [blissmiss] that's really nice. Maybe the Bhuddists had it right all along...
neutrinos_shadow, Mar 15 2020

nineteenthly, Mar 16 2020

       <Puts on black armband>   

       His widow emailed me the bad news.   

       RIP Max
not_morrison_rm, Mar 17 2020

AbsintheWithoutLeave, Mar 17 2020

       It is with considerable sadness that I read Paul's obituary this morning. I have been preparing both my elderly mother and my equally elderly mother-in-law for the "new normal" that is a potential 30-day lockdown in parts of the country.   

       My mum lives 1500km away, alone, so my life got a little busy for a while.   

       I noticed, and became concerned when a couple of my emails to Paul went unanswered. It transpired that I had reason to be concerned.   

       I had been in communication with Paul quite a bit through February and early March, having indicated I would send him a bottle of Australian rum by Wallaby Express Courier Service, which I did... though the rum ended up being an exclusive, small batch Filipino brand instead.   

       The one I wanted to send him could not be shipped by air as it contains too much alcohol by volume. Instead, I opted for a product already available in the UK, and had it delivered to him, c/- Rentisham's Wax Emporium.   

       I am unsure what the delivery driver might have made of that, or if it would even get to him.   

       It was a gesture that appeared to touch Paul deeply. He remarked a number of times that it was very good to have friends all over the world.   

       Paul also said he was very pleased to receive it; especially the chocolate that came with it, and that he had hopes it would prove to be "the very elixir of life itself".   

       Sadly, it did not live up to that promise but it did lift his spirits somewhat, in the last weeks of his life.   

       My relationship with Paul, in his persona as Maxwell Buchanan, may have seemed unusual to the outside observer, as we would often poke each other mercilessly in public, on the 'bakery. It was all in jest. Two people, separated by half a world, ribbing each other as they would if they were sitting in the same room, sharing a meal, a quiet drink and a similarly absurd sense of humour.   

       My sincerest condolences to his wife, Denise, and his daughter, Felicity, who must miss him terribly. Be proud of your memories of him, He was one of the good ones.   

       I would also suggest you see if you can't find the rum, and raise a glass to his global circle of friends. He will have stashed it somewhere safe, I imagine, as it was not really recommended with his chemo regime, as I recall.   

       Paul contributed more to the body of human knowledge than most will ever do, and I hope that his work informs and assists many more people over time.   

       I know that I will miss him greatly.   

       Now, I've got to be off. I'm expecting Sturton, with a delivery from Rentisham's factory any time now... some samples and the production formula for the famous Flenting Wax itself.
UnaBubba, Mar 22 2020

david_scothern, Mar 22 2020

Skewed, Mar 23 2020

       Thank you for that UB, the kind gestures towards Paul, the nice tribute to him and his family and the moving note to all of his other friends here.   

       It's very much appreciated.
doctorremulac3, Mar 23 2020

AusCan531, Mar 23 2020

       Yea, no shit.   

       Max would've probably appreciated the odd fact that you can agree with the statement "Well shit" by saying "Yea, no shit".   

       Somebody unfamiliar with the lingo might say "Well is it shit or no shit?" The answer of course being "It's total shit." affirmed by the response: "Yea, no shit."
doctorremulac3, Mar 24 2020

       Hello Halfbakers,   

       My name is Fish, and I'm Paul/Max's daughter.   

       I hope it's not weird hearing from me here, but I had known this was where my dad spent some of his time, and seeing all your posts on this thread I couldn't not come and talk with you.   

       My dad led an amazing life. His science and achievements speak for themselves - I'm not sure anything I could write would do justice to a mind like his. He was the best dad I could ever imagine having. I'm bound to say that, though, since we're so similar that he always used to joke I was actually the result of an early cloning experiment. (Luckily there is sufficient phenotypic evidence to confirm that he was, indeed, joking.)   

       From the moment I was born, he instilled in me the same sense of wonder and curiosity about the universe that gave him such joy throughout his life. One of the earlier lessons I can remember involved meeting a previously unencountered species in the back garden, after the stars had come out one evening. We were to approach the creature with extreme caution and a four-pronged approach involving a fork and some cat food. This made it immediately clear that the situation was serious, as we did not actually own a cat. Sadly the fork was deemed unsatisfactory by our subject, so Dad suggested I put the cat food on my finger and offer it to the creature that way. The following moment contained a very memorable combination of surprise and pain, and ever since then I have retained a healthy respect for hedgehogs as expert predators.   

       A lot of my memories with Dad are of countless DIY projects around the house and the garden. I'd follow him around passing him nails and screws, watching with fascination. Other adventures were less practical. One time we set off a pile of thermite on the driveway, just for fun (and notionally also for educational purposes), and on another occasion froze all sorts of different foods in liquid nitrogen. In case I can save anyone the displeasure of discovering it, ketchup is not a dish best served cold. Sliced cucumber seemed to go mushy, also definitely not a winner*. Stick to ice cream.   

       Over the years as I grew up, he would teach me about anything and everything, while always letting me choose my own path. I ended up leaning more towards physics and engineering than to biology, which entirely validated him feeding me a new Feynman book for several birthdays. It's thanks to my dad's endless enthusiasm for how the world works that I'm now finishing a metallurgy PhD (turns out playing with thermite did impart some sort of learning). Alongside that I've been tearing apart and reconstituting an old house with Mr Fish, doing my best to remember how Dad did stuff. But if there's something I don't know, that makes it twice as fun, because he always taught me to love the process of figuring things out.   

       Knowing his humility and sense of humour, I'm sure Dad would be cracking some joke right now, feeling silly that everybody has such nice things to say about him. So I wanted to tell you a couple of happy and entertaining memories I have of him in the hope of making you smile despite the loss. All of these adventures made me who I am, and I'll make sure I never forget what he taught me. I hope they're things all his friends will remember about him, too: fearlessness with ideas, a sense of humour, and knowing the importance of doing things for fun.   

       I'm going to have a read through his HB ideas and see if there are any I could do something with! Who knows, maybe I will even come up with some of my own. Thank you all for the sympathies you've expressed for me and my mum. And, finally, thank you all for sharing with my dad in the unbeatable enjoyment of idea-having.   


       *On second thought, could be excellent in a G&T. May have to repeat and refine the experiment now that I'm old enough to appreciate its results...
fishty, Mar 25 2020

       Welcome ...   

       Can't think of anything else to say at the moment.
8th of 7, Mar 25 2020

       Ditto ...   

       & thank you for popping by & sharing, it's much appreciated, & nice to know there's something of him still out there, even if the phenotypic evidence does indeed confirm that it's a little diluted, somehow knowing that he'll be missed by people that really knew him rather than just the shadow of himself he presented to us in his Maxwell Buchanan avatar makes it seem a little less bad, odd that, I don't really know how to explain it, & a bit silly, he was yours after all not ours, but nonetheless strange as it may seem hearing from you has made me feel a little bit better about his passing & I thank you for that, I wish he hadn't & don't really know how to express my condolences to you in a way that might help you & yours.   

       Know he'll be missed by those who only knew the fraction of him that he shared with us & that we know you must feel the loss more keenly than us.   

       It was much to soon & it sucks.
Skewed, Mar 25 2020

       "Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken ?"   

       - Terry Pratchett
8th of 7, Mar 25 2020

       Wow! I'm speechless.   

       Except for the "Wow! I'm speechless." part.   

       Thank you for the assurance that Paul's love for science and research will live on through you. You are truly the rainbow on an otherwise cloudy day.   

       And needless to say, my most heartfelt condolences. As the father of a young daughter I can attest that there is no greater love that a man can carry in his heart than for his little girl. I'm quite sure you brought incredible joy to his life.   

       OK, getting too emotional here.   

       Please disregard the real heavy last part, stick with the middle bits. Those were pretty good.   

       Thank you for reaching out, and of course you're welcome to join in these mostly silly discussions at any time. We'll always be happy to hear from you.   

doctorremulac3, Mar 25 2020

       Damn. I took one quick break from the halfbakery, and came back to find this. I am truly dismayed.   

       I honestly hoped to meet [Max] in person one day. Given that we worked in the same city, this shouldn't have been particularly challenging, but now the chance has passed for good.
Wrongfellow, Mar 25 2020

       Welcome, [fishty]. Looking forward to seeing your first idea.
pocmloc, Mar 25 2020

       Welcome. Thank you for sharing that. Your old man is missed by many.   

       My heart-felt condolences, [fishty], and thank you for dropping in to this crazy corner of the internet and sharing with us. The world is a lesser place without [MaxwellBuchanan].
neutrinos_shadow, Mar 26 2020

       My heart-felt condolences, [fishty], and thank you for dropping in to this crazy corner of the internet and sharing with us. The world is a lesser place without [MaxwellBuchanan].
neutrinos_shadow, Mar 26 2020

       [fishty] Welcome to this special place. You spoke better than anyone else could of Max (as he will always be known here) and from time to time he also spoke of you, with great pride and of course with typical humour. It was an honour and a privilege to share ideas and comments with Max, as we here have all pointed out. I had the additional privelege of sharing some physical pieces of work, that I thought would bring him some cheer.   

       The aftermath of a full and creative life as your dad's was will be more than his possessions, as its the contribution he made to the body of knowledge and research in his field that may in time impact on us all. Others will come and build on that work. I somehow feel at this time of frenzied investigation into Covid-19, that your dad would have had his sleeves rolled up, his lab working 24/7 but still somehow would also find the time to spark off some halfbakery gem. I miss Max every time I post something here. We all do. You have my sincere condolences, and I hope you may be a frequent and always welcomed visitor here.
xenzag, Mar 26 2020

       Oh [fishty] I feel so very honored that you have come here and let us be touched by a personal and sacred glimpse into the relationship you shared with your father. My daughter and I are close, but her connection with her dad has always been so much deeper and while unspoken, perhaps, magical. I get it. I love it.   

       Each and every time I came to the bakery, for some witty banter, creative motivation, or just to pass the time, especially at work, the first thing I would see would be Max and 8th going back and forth about something I had no concept of but still, and more importantly, I saw connection. I treasure the connections your father so easily made and nourished here. We all felt like his friend. It transcended the knowledge and went straight to the heart.   

       Kindness was his hallmark. I miss him everyday now that I've started coming back more often. His illness brought many of us back more frequently so that we could sit with him during his final difficult days. What an honor that was, and what a rare, and raw gift that was, that he allowed us to virtually hold his hand while we wished for the disease to die and for him to be spared, so he could live more years to come with you and your mum.   

       Alas, cancer won. The bastard.   

       He will be missed by many, loved by all, and touched forever by a whole host of faceless friends.   

       Terry Pratchett's quote on 8ths comment sums it up perfectly. "Do you not know that a man is not dead while his name is still spoken ?"   

       Please walk in the door of the asylum, and get to know your dad, through the eyes of his halfbaked world. Genius.
blissmiss, Mar 26 2020

       Our email client is set to add "#include <GNU_TERRY_PRATCHETT.H>" to every outgoing item; we also embed that text in every webpage we build or edit (or get access to for editing, whether the owner likes it or not ... on Wikipedia, lots of other people have got there ahead of us).   

       We suggest that some may wish to add "#include <GNU_P_H_DEAR.H>" in a similar way; thus "Max" will "live in the Overhead" (as Pterry put it) for all time.
8th of 7, Mar 26 2020

       [fishty], thank you for the context. Your dad was smart and hilarious, and I miss him as much as I miss other clever, valuable people I never personally met: Robin Williams, Jim Henson, George Carlin and Terry Pratchett, in no particular order.   

       Side note: a little over a quarter century ago, my son arrived on the planet. His nickname is Fish. Coincidence? I think n... probably.
Sgt Teacup, Mar 26 2020

       Hi [fishty],   

       Your father's mentioned you - with pride, no less - over the years. Glad, you've arrived at the HB shoreline, so the denizens can meet with the combination of Albert Einstein and Diana Riggs we've heard about.   

       Words may be just words, but I/we will really miss Paul/Max's wit, his aplomb and friendship. Bluntly, so will the world, what with the N-Prize and bio-research and all.   

       And, of course, purveyors and consumers of Rentisham's.
FlyingToaster, Mar 26 2020

       Thank you fishty for posting. What wonderful memories to share.
dentworth, Mar 26 2020


       I was really hoping not to come back and see this. [Max] will be missed terribly.   

       [fishty], thanks for the touching memories of your father. I hope that my kids can someday look back and say something as wonderful about me.
ytk, Mar 27 2020


       Welcome, [fishty]
sninctown, Mar 27 2020

       [MaxwellBuchanan], you will be missed. So much.   

       Welcome to the halfbakery [fishty]. I wish it were under better circumstances.
st3f, Mar 27 2020

       Hello and welcome, [fishty]!
I'd been hoping we'd get the chance to hear from you ever since - well, I guess it would be about the time you acquired Finnley. It seemed to me that a first daughter and her first horse would be an excellent spot of dad-training.
You and I have in common the experience of having been raised by geniuses. (I was adopted, so I missed the genetic side of that; but I was still expected to keep up.) That was one of the things I really liked about Paul: how much he reminded me of my own dad. Interested in everything, and willing to have a go at anything new. Particularly when you described his experimental bent, it took me back to my own past.
We also share having lost our dads too early. That loss is not easy to bear - both emotionally, and practically. Don't forget, don't despair, and above all, don't let it stop you. From anything. You know how much he's been your cheerleader in the past - you are now his message to the future. More than that - you are his vision and his hammer, sent forth into an unformed and malleable world in dire need of all the good that can be beat into it.
Bear up. You are meant to have joy.
lurch, Mar 28 2020

       ... and preserve 50% of his genes.   

       Sorry ... but that would probably have made him laugh.
8th of 7, Mar 28 2020

       See link - obituary. There may be others, but this is the one I found.
xenzag, Mar 29 2020

       Dear [fishty], thank you so much for your message to us. Max to Halfbakery has been like one of its major neurons, and will be missed greatly.   

       I had hopes that once he recovers, we could take on many realistic projects to transcend our biological limitations, but... Due to the irreversible changes that had occurred, some of those futures may have become inaccessible. It is sad.   

       Looking forward to your ideas, [fishty], and it's great to have some part of him, that is you, on Halfbakery.
Mindey, Mar 29 2020


       Welcome! I only wish it were under better circumstances. As a guide, I'd say that your experience with thermite may well have been a targeted educational experience. If you feel like writing any ideas, including ludicrously dangerous high-energy metal shenanigans is likely to go down very well indeed.
bs0u0155, Mar 30 2020

       Two points.   

       Firstly, It's just too sad to see Maxwell drop into the bakery bowels. I'm not ready. So...I'm churning...   

       Secondly, [pertinax], while meditating this morning, someone banged on my Jambe drum. Just once. Pretty lightly but very hearable.   

       No one else home. Cat can't play the drum, it's too tall.   

       'Splain, please.   

       A sudden thirdly came to me...Wait, where the hell is [doctorremulac3]
blissmiss, Apr 01 2020

       He suggested too many sensible, rational solutions, and the Thought Police took him away to a Re-Education camp ...
8th of 7, Apr 01 2020

       Doctorremulacthree here, hello my friends at the Bakery Half Talk.   

       I've changed my mind about governments using this coronavirus situation to take away our rights and expand their powers and enslave us by creating a permanent indebted surf class. I've made now very happy that the global banks are lending us the money to make virus go away, I'm happy to pay them.   

       Debt is freedom!   

       So thanks to bakery halvers and remember to support your globalist friends.   

       Your best good friend,   

       Doctor three Mr Remulac.
doctorremulac3, Apr 01 2020

       There's a good little prole.   

       And of course you love Big Brother too, don't you ?   

       Are you walking in sunlight, or walking down a white tiled corridor forever, with a guard at your back, waiting for a bullet in the brain that never comes ?   

       Mr. O'Brien says "Hi", by the way.
8th of 7, Apr 01 2020

       Books the doctor has readen like [AUTOMATICALLY REMOVED DUE TO BREACH OF COMMUNICATIONS PROTOCOL] are antithetical to the cause of citizen tranquility and happiness. They do nothing to calm the troubled mind and the envious spirit.   

       He have now seen the errors of his ways and I am the Third Doctor Remulac.
doctorremulac3, Apr 01 2020

       Congratulations. Your bright yellow Siva roadster will be delivered shortly. The frilly shirt and the velvet cloak are on the back seat, along with your UNIT ID card. Please keep the TARDIS clean inside as others will need to use it after you.
8th of 7, Apr 01 2020

       Jesus heavens, I haven't any idea what either of you is speaking about. You've all gone wacky, methinks.
blissmiss, Apr 01 2020

       You've developed a meme deficiency, [bliss], is all.   

       Just take these DVD boxed sets three times a day, with food. After all, you've nothing else to do at the moment, have you ?
8th of 7, Apr 01 2020

       I'm still working part-time. We are a non-profit charitable org that the homeless depend on. I still come in 4 days a week and sanitize the shit outta everything I gotta touch. Bleh
blissmiss, Apr 01 2020

       Yes, but if you're working with the homeless, you'll just be carrying on as normal, shirley ?   

       Look at the bright side; you're not in a hospital, so there are no doctors around to make people really ill.
8th of 7, Apr 01 2020

       Ha, 8th. Very funny. Talk nice about those medical profs.
blissmiss, Apr 01 2020

       Shan't. Medics are a menace. They all have Messiah complexes, they're hypochondriacs, and they have nearly as much arrogance and nearly as little empathy as geography teachers.   

       Do you ever see a medic showing the slightest interest in anyone healthy ? No, of course you don't. They're all vultures, predators, ghouls...
8th of 7, Apr 01 2020

       ^ And they - by definition - spend all their time around sick people.
FlyingToaster, Apr 01 2020

       My art teacher (pre options 11-13 age group) must have been a failed geography teacher then.   

       A classic chalk thrower & screamer, one of those that firmly believed children aren't people, noticeably improved year on year until by the 5th form he actually treated you like you might be human.   

       Often wondered what he was doing teaching when kids so clearly annoyed & frustrated him ;)
Skewed, Apr 01 2020

       ^ gr4 French : wicked aim with a piece of chalk, or an eraser ; also liked to sneak up on idlers and smack the desk with a yardstick. I imagine he was mostly trying to distract us so's we wouldn't gang up on him.
FlyingToaster, Apr 01 2020

       Blissy, I am pleased that you too are working despite this mess. May I suggest a pump-up insecticide sprayer filled with 5 gallons of sanitizer (or perhaps just straight bleach). Hose everything down, and don't forget the people.
whatrock, Apr 01 2020

       ^ Spinning shoulder & head mounted nozzles fed from a joggers hydration pack powered by whoopie cushions tied under your shoes, pumps & sprays as you walk, the amusing fart noises are an added bonus, keeps you surrounded in a perpetual antiseptic (or bleach) mist of your choice.
Skewed, Apr 01 2020

       // liked to sneak up on idlers and smack the desk with a yardstick. //   

       Geography teachers go for the fingers, or ears. Sounds like you both encountered sub-clinical cases - full-on examples are unmistakable, the flecks of spittle, the deranged screaming, the random irrational violence....   

       They say Hitler was a frustrated architect; we say he was a frustrated geography teacher, that's why he invaded all those countries, just so he could control all the lines on the maps. All megalomaniac dictators start thast way, first it's The Principal Imports And Exports of Blankistania, next thing it's We Must Control Blankistatania and its Natural Resources to Secure Lebensraum for Form 4B and Secure its Destiny and the next bit is all about greasing the tracks of the Panzers and What To Do After Firing...
8th of 7, Apr 01 2020

       // Cat can't play the drum, it's too tall //   

       You should have taken its stilts off before you went to bed, poor cat.   

       If the sound had happened in my house, I would probably have ascribed it to an invertebrate. Bees lose their way and bump into things audibly. Also, there are manic brown beetles that look as though they shouldn't be able to fly, but somehow can, but haven't mastered steering yet. And crickets - some of them grow to a good size, so you can hear it when they land, even when they don't land on a drum.   

       Maybe it's different where you live,[blissy], but those would be my first thoughts.
pertinax, Apr 01 2020

       //permanent indebted surf class//   

       Does indebted surf conceal loan sharks?
pertinax, Apr 01 2020

       Try floating a company and find out. You'll know when you hold the first board meeting.
8th of 7, Apr 02 2020

       //permanent indebted surf class//   

       We prefer the term indentured servant thankyouverymuch...   

       Ah yes, a much more genteel form of exploitative oppression; polite, legitimized, middle-class slavery without the stigmata of visible whips and chains.
8th of 7, Apr 02 2020

       Geog. teacher; interesting observation. Were you at my school perhaps [8th]? The preferred projectile of our Mr xxxx (Geog, & deputy head) was a chalk board rubber, but on one occasion it was a hard-backed hymn book lobbed with an impressive accuracy from the stage at a piss-taking second year's head during assembly. This stimulated both gasps from the crowd together with general cringing & cowering by all in the first six rows.
bhumphrys, Apr 02 2020

       That's a horribly familiar scene you've described. Did the book make a whirring noise like a startled partridge as it scythed through the air?   

       Unless he had a terrifying ability to skip a board-duster off an unoccupied desk in true Guy-Gibson-617- Squadron-Moehne-dam style and strike his target in the throat as a punishment for attempted talking, it wasn't the same psychopath.
8th of 7, Apr 02 2020

       Doc3 here, I've been let out of my cell for a bit as long as I don't talk about the glorious new world order, the excellent financial institutions paving the way towards mankind's glorious and well managed future and of course, most of all, its new Communist Party of China overlords. May they be praised for their excellence in ruling ability. (Phew, they make you memorize a lot of stuff in here.) NOT THAT THAT'S BAD!   

       I hope this becomes a de-facto general chat room without the need to come up with an invention premise. I think that's kind of a fitting memorial to Maximus and I'm going to honor it as such.   

       (What? That was never 5 minutes! OK OK! I'm getting back in! Easy with the bayonet! Jeez!)
doctorremulac3, Apr 02 2020

       [pertinax], too loud to have been an insect. Nahhhh It sounded like a good bang and just like you are supposed to hit it. Which is different than most drums. Weird. And it would have been a faster level if it had just been something landing, I imagine. And no, we don't have bugs yet. Soon though...
blissmiss, Apr 02 2020

       //as long as I don't talk about the glorious new world order// Then whatever you do, don't mention the fact that Russia is flying in plane loads of humanitarian aid to help a leaderless America in their time of total desperation.
xenzag, Apr 02 2020

       //too loud to have been an insect//   

       I can't rule out the possibility that God was speaking to you, but it certainly wasn't the sasquatch: I told him quite particularly that he wasn't to disturb you while you were meditating, and he's very good about that sort of thing.
pertinax, Apr 02 2020

       //as long as I don't talk about the glorious new world order// Then whatever you do, don't mention the fact that Russia is flying in plane loads of humanitarian aid to help a leaderless America in their time of total desperation.//   

       Somebody beat me to the punch on writing a book I had an idea for called "Hate Incorporated" talking about how the powerful divide and conquer for fun and profit. We're told there are only two schools of thought for all the complicated world problems, the "left" and the "right". Republican or Democrat. Further we're told that one side is 100% wrong all the time and the other is 100% right all the time. Pick your side and echo the party line. "There's only one real problem in the world, THOSE people. We get rid of them there are no more problems, the world is a very simple place, all our problems are very easy to solve, but we can't because the planet is just infected by "them".   

       I've decided to take a Venn diagram view of political discourse, not to try to be peaceful of lovey dovey, because I need to calibrate the person I'm trying to communicate with. For starters, is there any point we agree on? Leading to the second question: is there any point to this communication or is it just the equivalent of dogs barking at each other? If it's dogs barking, OK, that's fine but what's the point?   

       The alternative is to see if there are any points of agreement so that solutions could be arrived at through analysis and engineering practices rather than emotional and political which just end up making a lot of noise.   

       Something to consider: Two presidents, Bill Clinton and Donald Trump. Both dealt with their opposing party impeaching them. What did we get for that?   

       When Trump read in the state of the union address on February 4, he addressed the threat to America from the coronavirus, asserting, “Protecting Americans’ health also means fighting infectious diseases. We are coordinating with the Chinese government and working closely together on the coronavirus outbreak in China. My administration will take all necessary steps to safeguard our citizens from this threat.”   

       Nancy Peloci was given a copy of that statement. She made a grand show of tearing it up. The previous month two events occurred, Trump introduced a coronavirus task force that the left decried as having the wrong color skin showing that he was racist. That same month, to address the coronavirus threat, Nanci Peloci had 30 pens, custom printed with her name to sign the articles of impeachment for opening an investigation into obvious Democrat crimes of graft and corruption. She later also visited Chinatown in her district to encourage people to get out and mingle to show they weren't racist. China town is incredibly crowded.   

       Bill Clinton was impeached for a process crime, that is, although what he did may have broken some employment rules or civil codes, it wasn't a felony. Lying about it during the process was, and he was impeached for it.   

       Nobody will ever be able to say for sure, but he was tasked with killing a person who had declared war on the united states. He had several opportunities to kill this person, and at one point, even have him handed over to us by a foreign government. This would be a controversial move however, and he certainly had his hands full with the impeachment.   

       That man was Osama Bin Laden. The actions of this terrorist plunged the world into wars that have killed hundreds of thousands of people and cost trillions of dollars that could have been spent taking care of the citizens of this and other countries. Did a partisan impeachment cause a bloody war that's lasted almost two decades? Maybe not, but in retrospect, what if it did? Was it worth the risk that it might have?   

       So maybe we consider the cost of blind partisanship before engaging in the adrenaline rush of hating our fellow citizens.
doctorremulac3, Apr 02 2020

       Just skip straight to the biting contest, saves time, besides he who bites first often bites last .. can I interest you in this quality reconditioned kalashnikov? only two careful users, very little use, back on the market because the previous owner didn't use it enough.   

       Don't make his mistake, shoot first shoot often & think later (never ask questions, the answers only lead to premature thinking & more questions).   

       [Thinks to self : '& that cuts into my bullet sales turnover & profits']   


       Bullets are extra of course, how many do you want?
Skewed, Apr 02 2020

       Doc, doc, don't listen to him, he's working for Them, look, we'll sell you this lovely pre-owned Kalashnikov, only 650 genuine rounds since new, belonged to a little old lady preacher who only ever used it on Sundays to off those who didn't put enough in the collection plate, not a mark on the stock, plus six magazines, plus a free RPG launcher and a special offer on rockets ...   

       This offer won't be around long, all the smart people are signing up ...   

       <Smiles, nods, proffers clipboard with contract, and pen/>   

       // shoot first shoot often & think later (never ask questions, the answers only lead to premature thinking & more questions). //   

       Well, at least he got that bit right. But you still shouldn't trust him.   

       As TP said, "The People tended to be small-minded and conservative and not very clever and were even distrustful of cleverness. And so the children of the revolution were faced with the age-old problem: it wasn't that you had the wrong kind of government, which was obvious, but that you had the wrong kind of people."
8th of 7, Apr 02 2020

       [Glances over [8th]'s shoulder at the small print]   

       Hmm.. 'firing pin not included', crafty! now why didn't I think of that.   

       [Hastily adjusts his own contracts]   

       [Marks up spare firing pins on his price list]
Skewed, Apr 02 2020

       I actually do like the concept of a barking contest. (don't know about the biting) Just get two people on stage with microphones, they start barking for a minute, then the judge comes out...   

       I'm putting that up.
doctorremulac3, Apr 02 2020

Private Boney Bunney, Apr 03 2020

       Greatly looking forward to the inaugural First Annual Barking Olympiad. It can only provide a more relaxing, soothing soundtrack than the current global rabble about this virus thing...   

       Thank you for all your thoughts and memories about my dad. Each one of them has cheered me up for a moment, even though it's all kind of sinking in now. It's been amazing hearing about how he featured in people's lives in all sorts of ways. And it's just like you remind us, [8th] - as long as we all think of him now and then, we'll keep his influence in the world going.   

       [lurch], I'm sorry to hear you experienced this kind of loss too. Thank you for the reminder that I'm a way for him to stick around in the world a little longer. That's definitely something I feel and like you say, it's a great reason to work hard and be happy. "Getting over" something like this has never seemed like a sensible concept to me; I think we're designed to adapt to loss and build around it instead. I'm curious to see how my path with this will evolve, and I hope you've found a similar, positive one.   

       [bs0u0155], I just saw Dad's post that you linked to... Not sure what to say. I'm sure I'll always be trying to do things that would make him happy and proud. (Also, I can indeed confirm that he gave me a set of lock picks. Could provide an excellent source of entertainment during this pandemic lockdown...)   

       [UnaBubba], the bottle of not-Bundaberg has been duly located (craftily hidden behind a tin of Rentisham's, of course). Thank you for sending it to Dad. I know it would have meant a huge amount to him that you and all his friends here were doing everything to keep nudging him forwards. A glass will duly be raised to toast all your efforts at the earliest opportunity.   

       Dad's funeral took place on Friday in beautiful sunshine. Due to the restrictions in place because of the pandemic, it was a small family ceremony, but a lot of people have expressed a wish to come and pay their respects together. We are planning to hold a memorial service when circumstances permit, so if anyone here would like to come along, please let me know. :)
fishty, Apr 06 2020

       fishty, so wish I could be there.   

       Linking to a book you might read to get some different perspective, doc3. Consider how many HHS secretaries we've had currently, and how hard it is to properly transfer information from one administration to another. From the very beginning Trump's planning was hobbled by his firing of the planning and transition team. And the evidence of the exponential curve speaks to the time we've lost due to gross mismanagement from the top down. Not going to respond on this page.
RayfordSteele, Apr 06 2020

       That's a function of representative democracies in general, [Ray] - intrinsically, unfixably flawed.   

       // And it's just like you remind us, [8th] //   

       <Respectful bows/>
8th of 7, Apr 06 2020

       It is so wonderful to hear from you fishty! Thank you for sharing with us at this solomn and trying time. I lost my mom a couple of years ago and I think you'll find that with time you'll get what I'll call "The memory smiles" where you''ll find yourself saying "Dad used to do this thing where...." or "Dad used to hum this song." or "Dad made the craziest joke once..." and you'll smile.   

       As hard to believe, the tears do eventually turn into these memory smiles. These are a different kind of smiles, they're not "Oh look! A monkey!" or "That guy just slipped on a banana peel." smiles, they're.... different, but they are smiles and you will cherish them.   

       I guarantee it.   

       P.S. You also inherit your dad's friendship and goodwill on this site so again, and I'm sure we're all in rare agreement on this, we'd love to hear from you about whatever, whenever.   

doctorremulac3, Apr 06 2020

       [fishty, I want to thank you so much for letting us know about the small but sacred service for Paul/Max.   

       It's hard to dig up words to be a balm for you when all the cliches run through my head. So I'll add a personal perspective.   

       When my mother died 6 years ago, the first few weeks, (funeral, greeting loved ones), was all a fluffy, surreal cloud-like existence, I couldn't sleep, but during the day I walked through everything that was expected of me in a pink haze. I went back to work right after and jumped in.   

       Weeks later I looked up and saw that it was 10 am, the time I used to call her every day. At that moment I felt her absence and it kicked me in the gut. In one moment I felt a lifetime of conflict, and resolution and finally acceptance The "I wish I hads" were many, the sorrow achingly deep.   

       As everyone will allude to time will heal some pain, but it never erases the sorrow. Hold on to what brings you joy, and hold tight.   

       Please visit us. Whether you want to or not, you are now a halfbaker forever.
blissmiss, Apr 06 2020

       It is Traditional for newbie halfbakers to be politely and courteously welcomed, and allowed a honeymoon period of two or three idea postings before the long-term inmates descend en masse and administer a merciless roasting for every slight misdemeanour, real or imagined*. Grammar, spelling, underlying concepts, bad science - no mercy is shown.   

       Few, if any, survive.   

       However, we consider it more than likely that you will be almost entirely spared such treatment, partly out of respect, but mostly out of fear (of poltergeist activity).   

       *No matter how careful you are, some pretext will be found. It's a bit like the Spanish Inquisition (but without the nice red uniforms).
8th of 7, Apr 06 2020

       In counterpoint, I was shown some mercy early on by a few, and that's why I'm still here, and why we all still put up with one-note actors.
RayfordSteele, Apr 06 2020

       // I was shown some mercy early on by a few //   

       It's a busy forum, with a lot of users; sadly, mistakes are made. You slipped through.   

       But you have been noted as A Clever One, and be assured you are being watched closely. Eventually, the opportunity will arise to put you in the Comfy Chair, and prod you with the Soft Cushions*.   

       If that doesn't work, there's always ... the Rack ! <Dah dah DAAAAA dramatic chord/>   

       *With all the stuffing up one end, too; particularly nasty.
8th of 7, Apr 06 2020

       Not a clever one, just an Old One. You may know me as Hastur in some of your earthling works.
RayfordSteele, Apr 06 2020


       I just saw this now. Does halfbakery category show on Recent?   

       [Fishty], my late condolences for your always early to answer father who we all wished well. (What was the meaning of his nick?)   

       For those of you who know someone who is at the end with stage 4 cancer, my mother had recieved a gift of three more years.   

       She passed 6 months ago from heart failure, but the cancer was cured. She had catheterized chemoembolization and catheterized thermal RF ablation, which is palative - treating the symptoms, cleans the body of growths but does not cure the cancer. Nevertheless, a single 20 minute treatment gave her back her voice and 4 more treatments once every 3 months were enough to clear it completely, with it expected to show up nearby or in other parts of the body, and repeatedly be treated likewise.   

       It is a well documented method of treatment "without surgery" for liver cancer and has been tried with success in Israel and Germany on patients with lung cancer of different types. Again, a palative treatment but it seriously helps the body (if you still have it).
pashute, May 08 2020

       Halfbakery category doesn't show up by default. You have to edit your recent view to bring it up.
RayfordSteele, May 08 2020

       My condolences about your mom Pash. I lost mine a while ago as well. Great that your mom got a little extension though eh?
doctorremulac3, May 08 2020

       Yes, [pash], if I may call you that...my condolences for your mother's trials and loss to cancer. There are not many words that can make one feel better with the loss of a parent.   

       My husband is struggling with losing both of his in January. He keeps the pain in. Unlike I, who sat at the window and sobbed for Max's post at that very same time, someone I had not even met. Go figure.
blissmiss, May 08 2020

       Nothing odd about that Blissy, shows you have a heart.
doctorremulac3, May 08 2020

       Buchanans' chunky cut marmalade!   


       So many questions.   

       Why did no one tell me about this?   

       When did the estate move into marmalade?   

       It's not rentishams in a jar with a different label is it?   

       How did they get Hugh to front this for them?   

       The Buchanan estate doesn't do wages so they must have something on him.   

       Must be worse than that little trist in the colonies that time or he wouldn't care.   

       Fascinated to know what it could possibly be.
Skewed, May 21 2020

       The Estate of Buchanan, fabulously wealthy after selling production rights of their legendary Scotch recipe to, well the Scots has apparently moved into other culinary enterprises. There is also a rumor of neckties that tie themselves and a car door that opens inward.
whatrock, May 22 2020

       I haven't been here for years, so only learnt about this today. :( shocked.
simonj, Sep 10 2020

       //Jesus coffee ring// One of my favs. Don't stay gone so long. And yes, we were all shocked, I believe.
blissmiss, Sep 10 2020

       "Know you what Earth shall lose tonight, what rich, uncounted loans,
What heavy gold of tales untold you bury with my bones?"
- Chesterton </Belated>
pertinax, Oct 06 2020

       Beautiful, [pertinax].   

       “I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.” -- Woody Allen
4and20, Oct 06 2020

       What [4and20] so eloquently muttered.
blissmiss, Oct 08 2020

stupop, Oct 08 2020

       Just to say there is a bike ride for charity, I think by one of Max's colleagues. More detail as I get it .Dear all, I hope you are keeping well. This is to let you know that a colleague of Paul's - Dr Art Abelian - is kindly planning a cycle ride in memory of Paul and their work on developing a successful test for meningitis in the new born. Here is the link for sponsorship should you be interested. All funds go to support future research in the area of Child Health. Anyone can donate to JustGiving page by clicking here: (See ‘JustGiving’ link).
Please browse the page to find out more about the ride. Thank you

       Denise Dear (see ‘LinkedIn’ link)
not_morrison_rm, Feb 20 2021

       Love this. However when following the link I only find "linkedin" links.
blissmiss, Feb 20 2021

       [nmrm] has put spaces in the link, you have to remove them.
pocmloc, Feb 21 2021

       thanks for bringing this back up...had a chance to read more of it. I loved to see and hear from [fishty]!   

       ....been almost a year...
xandram, Feb 21 2021

       ([nrm] Links moved to ‘Links’ section of this page)
hippo, Feb 21 2021

       Damn it! This just came back around, and made me cry a little.   

       Hi to [fishty]. Welcome to the nuthouse. Enjoy the rum, as necessary. I loved the hedgehog story. Awesome.   

       I have just learned of the untimely death of a school friend, with whom I now wish I had maintained better communication.
UnaBubba, Feb 26 2021

       I miss him. He enjoyed arguing with me for some reason I never quite understood and I planned to make my way to his neck of the woods someday so we could argue in person.   

       I always pictured it as starting with Sasquatch and going off on tangents from there...   

       He lurks here, I just know it. You know he would if it was possible. He would even probably alert 8th. I know he's here.
blissmiss, Feb 27 2021

       yeah, but where is [8th]? seems mia...
xandram, Feb 28 2021

       Last prolonged absence he was busy with other things*, off on some mission or other that may have involved leather, fair maidens, grog, jousting and blood (hopefully someone else's).   

       He could just as easily be repainting the Cube.   

       *yes I know, what could be more important than being here.
whatrock, Feb 28 2021

       ty...i was getting worried [whatrock]
xandram, Mar 01 2021

       [8th] is probably getting the Covid anal swab test from China, but he's asking them to be extremely thorough.
4and20, Mar 01 2021

       //yeah, but where is [8th]? seems mia.// He's gone to ground again, and may have to be smoked out once more. This has happened before, but with suitable bait dangled, he emerges blinking in the light like a naked mole rat caught in the midday sun.
xenzag, Mar 01 2021

       // anal swab test //   

       You mean, er, an analysis?
whatrock, Mar 01 2021

       Administered by an assistant
pocmloc, Mar 01 2021

       I'm assuming the passage of gas while assisted will produce a more bass tone?   

       You guys are so funny. Too dern funny. I hope 8th is back for this lovely month of March. The pandemic is getting much better here, for now, and spring is right around the corner. Time to come home, Mr. 8th.
blissmiss, Mar 02 2021

       i knew something was wrong when he hadn’t showed up for so long..........heavy sigh
xandram, Mar 02 2021

       I guess he took me literally, and he did return Home, forever. My God, I'm gonna miss him terribly.
blissmiss, Mar 02 2021

       [Max], it's been a year since we all started missing you. We've been waiting for that sign that you're still around, like a tin of Rentishams mysteriously appearing on the table (and then just as mysteriously disappearing) but so far...   

       Probably understandable, as you got a new visitor some weeks ago and have likely been talking ever since. A thousand unfinished conversations and likely some new ones (why do we not fall through the clouds? why does the Guinness not evaporate at this altitude? why does the Ultimate Answer keep coming out as 41.99999?)   

       Make the new guy do the heavy lifting, [Max]. It's cool.
whatrock, Mar 11 2021

       If I'm not back again this time tomorrow...
UnaBubba, Mar 12 2021

       I know this is going to be unpopular, but in all the time I read and admired Max/Paul, I made a point of restricting my requests to grand scientific projects. It is entirely likely that Max/Paul had been miscast as a pure scientist and he had his own reasons for posting as often as he did on HB, though for someone like him, multitasking was not that challenging, but I just wish he'd spent slightly more time on curing cancer...
4and20, Mar 13 2021

       I'm not sure that scientists arn't still over-represented in the halfbakery frequentists. Depending on how you define scientist.
So I think it's more of an idiosyncrasy of a certain sort of mind than a particular failing on Max's part.
Loris, Mar 13 2021

       I wish [Max] were here, so that we could tease him with the fact that Oxford has produced an effective covid-19 vaccine and Cambridge has not. It might just have provoked him to invent a better one.
pertinax, Mar 16 2021

       I realize that here west of the Pond it's not strictly the 27th yet but over on your side it is, so I'd like to say Happy Birthday [Max].
whatrock, Apr 27 2021

       I am so sorry I was away from the bakery, and that I missed my chance to say goodbye. We never met in person, but I will miss you [MB}.
MechE, Aug 02 2021

       I poke my head in to look around and find Max is dead. And 8th. I felt like I was talking to those guys.
bungston, Dec 25 2021

       You are equally missed, though still here.
xenzag, Dec 25 2021

       It's been a long while... A long read, and now a long face.
TIB, May 12 2022

       Oh, bugger.   

       I've been away a long time and just now found this.   

       I just love how Max kept his cheer up and shared his last journey with his 1/2b friends. That's so him.   

       Virtual hugs to everyone.
Custardguts, Jun 05 2022

       Yup, he left as he lived. Honest, out there, and brilliant. Good to see you, custard. Bad at this occasion.
blissmiss, Jun 06 2022

       I have been absent for some time and missed this. I can't say I knew MB directly very well, but his brilliant ideas and hilarious comments on were one of the things I always looked forward to on the Halfbakery.   

       One of my favorite quotes (which Google tells me is attributed to Sylvester Stallone, but we'll just forget about that) is "you are what you leave behind". I see that MB had over 700 ideas posted here. And that was with his spare cycles!   

       What an amazing, unique person.
swimswim, Jun 07 2022

sartep, Jul 19 2022

Dub, Aug 18 2022

       Since at least 2018, the American Cancer Society has been recommending annual low dose CT scans for recent smokers over 50. This appears to be based on a large 2014 study which showed 20% reduction in all cause mortality.   

       As of 2023, the NHS in the UK is still preparing itself to make a similar recommendation.
4and20, May 04 2023

       In fairness, Max was smart enough to fully know the risks of every substance with which he came in contact. Still missed by me everytime I post an idea here, many of which were calculated to wind up himself and 8th in particular, another huge loss.
xenzag, May 04 2023

       I bet regular low-dose CT scans for non-smokers over 50 would also increase life spans
Voice, May 04 2023

       I don't know about this CT scan example but sometimes it's necessary to not just look at the sensitivity and specificity of a test but also to look the whole sum which includes wider harms. For example there are tests for prostate cancer which are good, but which are not regularly given to men as a general screening because of the risk that undergoing the test may cause impotence and incontinence. If a man has symptoms which suggest prostate cancer or a family history of prostate cancer then it's worth taking the risk of using this test, otherwise not.

In addition, if a test has a high false positive rate there is the impact of causing a lot of people to worry unnecessarily and undergo the cost and inconvenience of follow-up investigations. In short, mass screening is not always the best approach.

[Sensitivity (true positive rate) is the probability of a positive test result, conditioned on the individual truly being positive.
Specificity (true negative rate) is the probability of a negative test result, conditioned on the individual truly being negative.]
hippo, May 04 2023

       // a man has symptoms which suggest prostate cancer or a family history of prostate cancer then it's worth taking the risk of using this test, otherwise not.//

Thanks, I was looking for a way to say "no one fingers this bum. No one."
Voice, May 04 2023


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