h a l f b a k e r yWhy on earth would you want that many gazelles anyway?
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We all know our last day will come,
For some sooner than others,
And written will be eulogies,
By our HB 'baker brothers.
I fought with [Max] and [8th] a lot,
Or so believed the purists.
In truth it was a comic act,
We put on for the tourists.
It's been not quite a
year now,
Since [Max] set off with Sturton,
And we said goodbye to Rentisham's,
No more flenting wax, for certain.
To read this latest news just hurt,
"We've lost the Eighth of Severn."
It all still feels a bit surreal,
Another stalwart gone to heaven,
Remember [8th] in your own way,
From wherever you may hail.
Here's my little anecdote,
Of my friend from Eastern Wales.
Those who've been around a while,
May recall the daunting tale,
Of [8th]'s tussle with a tank,
In some boggy, English dale.
He thought he'd like a look inside,
So climbed up on the top,
Positioned himself above the hatch,
And let his full weight drop.
The hole, alas, was undersized,
In [8th]'s version of the ballad,
In truth, it was the stodgy food,
And not enough of salad.
Six squaddies, armed with levers,
And sweat, and strain, and swearing,
Took an hour to dislodge him,
From the tank he was now wearing.
For me, I shall remember him,
With a Purdey on his shoulder,
A slow march to a bagpiped dirge,
Never to grow older.
Coffin for 8th
Claymore_20Anti-Tamper_20Coffin [bs0u0155, Mar 16 2021]
[link]
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Not saying goodbye yet, loving all these stories and tributes
and words of affection. I never once took his jabs to heart.
Lovely poem, UB, lovely memories of a brilliant and oh-so-
sweet soul. |
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It was only a week ago that I learned my high school
girlfriend died suddenly, from a rare disease. |
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I was only just getting to know him... a real punch to the gut. |
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Nice. Just for a minute there, I actually started to believe that he was a self-hating Welshman. |
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Someone should play the bagpipes at his funeral
and find a way of featuring a large swarm of cats.
(Are there details that can be shared here?) I have
his private email, but doubt if even 8th will answer
now, thought you never know... |
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I think his hearse should be a helicopter. |
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He *hated* helicopters. And kids. And cats. And humanity.
And clumsy officers mishandling explosives in Southwest
Asia, while he was in close proximity. |
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I've tried to read it numerous times, and still haven't managed to get all the way through. |
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How can people I've never met in meat-space have this effect on me? He and I talked like twice or something anywhere other than here. Tears? WTF? Bristolz, MB, 8th.. |
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If any of you folks think that if had I gotten to know you even a little bit and you think that your passing might spontaneously make me tear up at completely inappropriate times could just stop dying... I would be good with that. |
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I could not read everything he has written here and did not understand much of what I did read. |
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I wrote it, [FlyingToaster]. A few tears there. |
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And writ' wonderful it is. More than a few, here. |
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Jesus, just read this again. That's an incredibly beautiful
eulogy UB. |
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There's been funny, clever, even majestic and poetic stuff
posted on this site over the years but for me, nothing
matches your line: |
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"A slow march to the bagpiped dirge, never to grow
older." |
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I wish there were a generic version of this. I would read
that at the way too many funerals I've had to attend in
my life. |
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It's beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. |
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Thank you [dr3]. Sometimes I write things that work. |
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I still find it hard to believe. Those two guys, what a pair of
somethings. Bookends. |
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It was a joy to banter with them ;_- |
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It was a joy to try to keep up or simply watch them. |
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Ain't that the truth. I just sat back and soaked it in. I couldn't
ever join in, but the words that flowed back and forth were
perhaps perfection. |
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Indeed. The phrase "neither had Langsdorf's leg" returns only
one result from Google. (Slightly delayed Epimenides paradox
arriving in 10 ... 9 ...) |
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Now, who's going to return [8th]'s collection to the Imperial
War Museum, before it falls into the Wrong Hands? |
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Don't say "Sturton", because those *are* the Wrong Hands. |
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//Don't say "Sturton", because those *are* the Wrong
Hands.// |
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It's actually surprising that any hands would be left in that
context... |
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You'd need [8th]'s collection to safely handle [8th]'s collection. |
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[8th]'s "collection" is no joke. |
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I recall getting an email once, about an incident where he
was teaching some officers in one of the eastern 'stans
about ordnance disposal. They were hands on, in blast
suits; he was supervising. |
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He said everything was going well until suddenly it wasn't,
and he was deaf, feeling very unwell, and pasted liberally
with components, droplets and gobbets of a former
foreign Army Captain. His commanding officer decided
he had done enough for his country and sent him home to
the UK. |
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That's sobering. How long ago was it, if you don't mind my
asking? |
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I... have no words at all beyond these I've just spoken. He
will be very much missed. Does anyone know if he was a
drinker, and if so what he liked? I should very much like to
raise a glass of something he'd have liked in his memory. |
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I hope his casket, if he has one, is done up ornately in
brass and mahogany. |
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I think he would prefer shell casings and kitten fur. |
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//I think he would prefer shell casings and kitten fur.// |
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I had a good think about what he'd want. I think this
<link> is at least close. He bloody loved a shaped charge so
he did. |
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//Does anyone know if he was a drinker, and if so what he
liked?// |
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We have a lot more documentation of what he disliked than
what he liked - but he was certainly an eater, and liked
curries and chocolate cakes. From this we could speculatively
infer either Kingfisher lager (an Indian brew suitable for
accompanying curries, because not too gassy) or maybe an
IPA. |
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He liked strong beer. He'd say a lot of things like; "Subject to a satisfactory explanation, the concept of a tap on the sink or bath that dispenses fresh beer is highly attarctive."
8th of 7, Dec 04 2007 |
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Good to know, 2 fries. Thanks. |
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What terrible news.
[8th] was... he was a big part of this place. Between him
and [MB]... entertained, challenged, educated... |
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