Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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I CAN HAZ CROISSANTZ?

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Adult theme park ride

  (+33, -2)(+33, -2)(+33, -2)
(+33, -2)
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This would have to have some sort of sign on it like "Customers must be over 5' 11" to ride" or "Customers must be over 40 to ride". You'd get on and be whisked away on a little "Ghost train"-like ride into a large scary-looking structure.

Once inside, your car would stop in a small, soundproof room, tastefully decorated and, in winter months, with a log fire burning. You'd get out and relax in a comfortable chair with a really good cup of tea and a slice of cake, just enjoying the peace and quiet after the migraine-inducing noise and excitement of the theme park or idly flicking through one of the periodicals laid out on a small side-table.

A muted gong sounds after 10 minutes and you get back in your carriage and travel at high speed outside again, where you can tell your kids how scary it was.
hippo, Sep 24 2008

[link]






       How will you prevent abuse, vandalism, and quickies?
Voice, Sep 24 2008
  

       how can you guarantee abuse, vandalism and quickies?
po, Sep 24 2008
  

       Sounds like something based on a recent experience? +
xenzag, Sep 24 2008
  

       Not really - I'm just not keen on noisy, crowded places unless I can occasionally escape from them and this seemed like a good solution to a theme park environment. Thinking about it now though, I'm not sure when I last went anywhere like a theme park, although I think I'm going to LegoLand in about a month...
hippo, Sep 24 2008
  

       Should have gone to Lapland instead - it's open all winter.
xenzag, Sep 25 2008
  

       This is not at all what I was expecting.
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 25 2008
  

       That is because you are a sick, twisted pervert, [MB].   

       There needs to be a rack of paisley-pattern dressing gowns, and carpet slippers in a range of sizes.   

       The deluxe version includes a bottle of port [+].
8th of 7, Sep 25 2008
  

       //That is because you are a sick, twisted pervert, [MB].// You're not so bad yourself, 8th.
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 25 2008
  

       Legoland has a place where you can mess with the Mindstorm robotics stuff. You need to go to Legoland in a big enough pack that you can hand off the 6 year olds to someone else while you check out the Mindstorm stuff.
bungston, Sep 26 2008
  

       What [po] and [Voice] said.
nomocrow, Sep 26 2008
  

       Excellent. This might induce me to buy a season pass.
elhigh, Sep 29 2008
  

       8th's version sounds a little too Holmesian. I'd be concerned that the adults would exit the ride shouting "Quickly, Watson! The game's afoot!", thereby totally messing with their kids' minds.   

       Then again, that might be a good thing...
Canuck, Sep 30 2008
  

       One-size-doesn't -quite-fit-all, then ...
8th of 7, Sep 30 2008
  

       .... and in one corner, a table crowded with chemicals and laboratory glassware ..... a Stradivarius violin on a side table ..... a large magnifying glass and a persian slipper of tobacco.   

       And don't forget the hypodermic syringe of vegetable alkaloids ...
8th of 7, Sep 30 2008
  

       coca's a vegetable ?
FlyingToaster, Sep 30 2008
  

       // coca's a vegetable ? [FT] //   

       As much as spinach is, I suppose. Hmmm... spinach alkaloids - is that what Popeye was on?
cybervenom, Sep 30 2008
  

       Make it more fun by staying in after the train leaves, and taking the next one, to really mess with their minds.
Bukkakinator, Oct 01 2008
  
      
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