Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Airplane Quarantine Auction

Everyone wins
  [vote for,

It's very common for airplane passengers to be taking a big, important trip, spending significant time and money, and they don't want to get sick.

It's also common to have a few sick people on the plane with you, coughing.

The idea is: Let the airplane personnel walk down the aisle and pass out secret envelopes. You can "vote" for one of your fellow passengers to be quarantined, by checking the box with their seat #. You can also include a price you'd be willing to pay.

The staff collects the secret envelopes, and determines if anyone "won". If they do, then they charge your seat the bid price you offered, and approach the "winner".

The sick winner then gets ushered to the back of the plane, where there's air separation & filtration.

The seats are comfy there, and it's more pleasant than the coach cabin, as we don't want to be mean. They are sick afterall & need more care. And, we don't want to start a fight.

Then, 95% of the passengers get to their destination healthier. The 5% sick passengers get a better experience. The airplane company gets extra revenue with high margin.

sophocles, Jun 10 2014


       Erm, immediate competition for whoever can most realistically fake up the symptoms of [insert newest type of] flu?   

       Try riding a bus in Thailand, guaranteed it'll stop somewhere with lots of chickens running around loose, and the guy who gets on at that stop sits behind you and spends the whole trip coughing and sneezing....all part of the (alleged) fun.
not_morrison_rm, Jun 10 2014

       Yeah, I did think 1 move ahead & consider people might be faking it, as we just provided an incentive. That said, it's half-baked. Maybe if 90% of the plane is faking/sick, the healthy 10% get to go relax in the quarantine cushiness and the 90% suffer together in coach?
sophocles, Jun 10 2014

       Could auction winners be quarantined in place? Gas masks? Or your seat sealed off behind zippered clear vinyl sheeting? Maybe curtain off the last few seats near the planes tail? No one sick, no need to pay to carry a comfy space along.
popbottle, Jun 10 2014

       Just pack every single passenger in their own padded, filtered ventilation crate, along with enough xanax to keep them out until they reach their destination.
MechE, Jun 10 2014


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