Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Alien Exploder

Actual name: Alien Sock Stealer Sucker Exploder but I detest long titles
  (+13, -5)(+13, -5)
(+13, -5)
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By now I think we are all ready to acknowledge that aliens are stealing our socks from the dryers, to harvest our DNA. I for one have had enough of this intrusive, destructive, behaviour.

The link(now gone missing) illustrates my machine which when attached to the ordinary dryer drum, detects alien beings, extracts the alien by vacuum, wrests from him the sock in question and sends him into a containment unit.(Thanks to Ghostbusters for that technology.)Once trapped, the alien is exploded and burned leaving only ashes to be swept out at a later time. All this is accomplished with sensors, and an internal robotics claw.

dentworth, Aug 06 2005

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       What?! You blow up the alien without harvesting his DNA?
baconbrain, Aug 06 2005

       Harvest it between the exploding and the reducing to ash. Nice [dent] [+]
coprocephalous, Aug 06 2005

       Once you capture an alien, use Adobe DNAShop to change the sock-stealing imperative to something more desirable, like laundry-folding. Then you just release the alien back into your laundry room.
luxlucet, Aug 06 2005

       hmmm lux, interesting idea, but won't the other aliens come looking for him?
dentworth, Aug 06 2005

       I reckon if you and your experiment (the alien) both wear tinfoil hats, I think that should be enough to prevent other aliens from finding their friend.
froglet, Aug 06 2005

       Just silly enough to be bunned.
5th Earth, Aug 06 2005


       First of all, we don't like to be called aliens, and second of all we don't harvest your socks for DNA. We pick up your DNA from the same place you get it, bars.
sartep, Aug 07 2005

       Hmm if you just collected the aliens instead of blowing them up you could burn them in the winter to heat your house.
Cubical_View, Aug 07 2005

       My grandmother thinks we should burn them alive, and keep them alive and burning forever, to punish them for stealing.
baconbrain, Aug 08 2005

       [sartep], What system do you COME from? It's not the DNA that we want it's the .... um .... this concept is not easily translatible. My guess is terrans will figure it out in the next 50 years.
But yes, since the mass production of the cell phone, bars seem to be the only good collection place.
Zimmy, Aug 09 2005

       It is in the SMC.   

       I'm sorry but anything calling for the destroying of others, gets a rare - from me.
sartep, Aug 09 2005

       Ah Sartep, I knew this would get your attention. but I imagine the sock stealing aliens (what do you prefer to be called?) are of a different race, planet, or creed.   

       I could contain them and not explode them, but just returning them to the atmosphere would send the wrong message.
dentworth, Aug 09 2005

       Well, You know what they say.If the sock fits blow them up.
skinflaps, Aug 09 2005

       People, people... come on! It's not the aliens that are stealing our socks... it's the damn Sock Gnomes! Truuuuuust me. I have pictures. They come out at night and take them from our rooms so they can later be fashioned into hats. Pffft! Aliens... How crazy is that?
ChrispyChreme, Aug 09 2005

       not sure why this popped back up, all I did was copy a link.
dentworth, Sep 25 2007


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