Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Automatic windscreen washer

Washes your windscreen at the traffic lights
 
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I'm a bit bored with those silly buggers who charge over to you at the traffic lights and ask you if you want your window washing while squirting what looks like last nights bong water all over your car and then smearing it with an old t-shirt all over the place. Then when you say 'no, piss off and get a job', the get all arsey with you and then go an' hassle the next victim. I propose a system of hydraulically operated arms and squirters, positioned on the traffic light poles that, when the lights are on red, come down and automatically wash and dry the windscreen of the first car in the queue. All the technology is availiable, and you wouldn't have to spend 10 minutes cleaning bong water off your paintwork. Every so often you would find yourself at the front of a queue, and get a nice clean window. Just one of those little things that would make living in a city a more pleasant experience.
briandamage, Jan 23 2003

[link]






       Oh yes, those buggers! they have them in NZ aswell huh.(+)
skinflaps, Jan 23 2003
  

       // propose a system of hydraulically operated arms and squirters//

Would this system behave erratically, and smell of alcohol? (I assume so, therefore a pastry.)
pluterday, Jan 23 2003
  

       This might cause a musical chairs effect with everybody rushing to be the first to the intersection and then s-l-o-w-l-y rolling past to be the one in front when the light turns red.
FarmerJohn, Jan 24 2003
  

       <turns radio onto funk-it-why-don't-ya-FM> nice one [Farmerjohn]
skinflaps, Jan 24 2003
  

       what about all those guys rushing to wash the windows of the car behind the first car?
yamahito, Jan 24 2003
  

       Except that, the other day when proceeding in an orderly manner about my local town, every single light turned red just as I reached it - every single one - not one remained green (can you tell I was a little soured by the experience?). With this invention, I wouldn't have any windscreen left - it would have been rubbed away.
PeterSilly, Jan 24 2003
  

       Make sure your visor is down when riding a motorbike.
Gordon Comstock, Jan 24 2003
  

       If the purpose is to defeat the window washer guys, which seems like the actual motivation here, this won't work.   

       Here in New York, our off-duty cops shoot these guys, so I'm kind of sympathetic to them...
snarfyguy, Jan 24 2003
  

       Maybe what's needed is a separate set of squirters operated by a special button so that when one of the squegee guys walks up to the car he can be given some motivation to leave it alone. A much gentler variation of the South African anti-carjack system.
supercat, Jan 24 2003
  
      
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