Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
I like this idea, only I think it should be run by the government.

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Bath Monkey

Wrestle until you are clean.
  (+14, -7)
(+14, -7)
  [vote for,

A buddy makes bath time more fun.

Monkeys could be trained to live in the bathroom of your home.

When you take a bath they jump in with you.

Their body heat would warm the water and their erratic splashing will aid bubble formation.

Most important bath monkey feature is this: Because they are typically mostly hairy all over, they can function as a giant live scrubbie. Soap your bath monkey up and then wrestle until your squeaky clean!

vfrackis, Apr 02 2009

Bath monkey http://www.woosk.co.../09/monkey-wash.jpg
[normzone, Apr 03 2009]

No joke. Monkey evil. Monkey bad. http://www.wfsb.com...8726175/detail.html
No wet monkeys please. [blissmiss, Apr 03 2009]

Code monkey http://www.youtube....watch?v=v4Wy7gRGgeA
[phoenix, Apr 03 2009]


       brilliant [+]

       //Soap up your bath monkey...// [marked-for-tagline]
FlyingToaster, Apr 02 2009

       SNL: Bathroom monkey? Convergent evolution or simple lack of attribution?
WcW, Apr 03 2009

       Cruel yet cool.
wagster, Apr 03 2009

       If you have ever tried this with your own children you would relise that the danger to eyes and other soft bits of your person from flying knees and elbows outweighs the advantages (and monkeys are a lot stonger).
eight_nine_tortoise, Apr 03 2009

       You are aware of the monkey that ate his owner's friend's face in Connecticut recently...right??? Monkeys not such good bath buddies. You might try sharks if you enjoy monkeys. (Hey I didn't know till this happened either.) No monkeys in bath or barns or backyards. No monkeys...
blissmiss, Apr 03 2009

       Maybe Dickensian orphans could be employed as bathtime assistants - Bath Oliver.
coprocephalous, Apr 03 2009

       Very Michael Jacksonish. This whole thing has become very MJish.
blissmiss, Apr 03 2009

       <Masturbation Joke>   

       To get clean you have to beat the monkey? It's just going to make you sweatier, no?   

theleopard, Apr 03 2009

theleopard, Apr 03 2009

       so you should be.
po, Apr 03 2009

       i'll take two.
k_sra, Apr 03 2009

       I'd guess in 50 years someone will bake this with robots. If you do, futureperson, let me know so I can buy one.
sninctown, Apr 03 2009

       It's a fine line between brilliant and dumb. This is on the dumb side [-]
simonj, Apr 06 2009

       cute until they bite
pertinax, Apr 07 2009

       Actually, wait. If it's possible to breed the 'ragdoll' cat, maybe it's possible to breed the 'bath-safe monkey'.
pertinax, Apr 07 2009

       Feed the monkeys copious amounts of bananas.If the monkeys expel a flatus whilst in the tub you'd have a bubble bath type jacuzzi.
skinflaps, Apr 07 2009

       sp. floatus
theleopard, Apr 07 2009

       So that's why Jackson named the chimp "Bubbles"?
coprocephalous, Apr 07 2009

       "Detective Angstrom looked at the carnage... sure the hot-tub was meant for 4 people, but who would be stupid enough to use a silverback gorilla for a bath monkey ?"   

       "Time for your bath Jimmy, don't make me send the Bath Monkey up to get you..."   

       "Fred was confused... certainly the family was clean, but didn't the dog used to have fur ? and why did his wife insist on him wearing that silly gorilla mask to bed ?"   

       "the last time your mother visited, it took us a week to coax the bath monkey out of hiding"   

       ... okay I think I got it out of my system now...
FlyingToaster, Apr 07 2009

       If the monkey lived in the humid conditions of the bathroom, and was subject to lots of soap - there's a high likelyhood that its skin would develop all manner of flaky irritations, skin infections and general dermatological unpleasantness.   

       Short of having a ready supply of fresh disposable monkeys that I'd be required to either exterminate or set free post usage; I don't think I'd like to rub up against, wrestle with, or otherwise molest a diseased primate in order to maintain my personal hygiene.
zen_tom, Apr 07 2009

       //molest a diseased primate in order to maintain my personal hygiene.//   

       Olfactory epithelium indeed.
skinflaps, Apr 12 2009

       Good idea, but even better if it's a page 3 girl dressed as a monkey :-)
farmbrough, Nov 19 2009

       Just yes. [+]
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 19 2009


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