Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Bite me.

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Bird Hats

Hats with bird wings
  (+7, -3)
(+7, -3)
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Not real bird wings of course, but very good imitations that have a little engine to make them flap and flutter realistically, or fold away against the side of the head when required e.g. to keep the ears warm on a cold day.

For the gentleman at the extreme end of the testosterone scale there is the Hawk, or any of the other various birds of prey.

For others there is the Vulture to consider. Dubious night folk may be attracted to the leathery black wings of the bat family. Athletes will naturally want to equip themselves with the high speed grace of the Kestrel, or the long distance elegance of the Albatross.

For others only the blazing colour of a tropical bird will suffice to compliment a summer outfit.

Regular preening and maintenance will keep the replica feathers in perfect condition.

Bird Hats are supplemented with a range of accessories i.e. tails, heads, necks and beaks that can be mixed and matched, though only a total twit would go out with condor wings, chicken head and humming bird's tail on a baseball cap.

xenzag, Dec 03 2006

Latest In Fall Fashions http://www.brillian...r_of_dreams_blk.jpg
Compliments of Hermes (Winged Mercury) Design Studio [jurist, Dec 03 2006]

Deluxe Flapping Wing Pig Hat http://www.centuryn...il_296_092-109.html
Another article in the Xenzag closet for celebrating the rarest of occasions. [jurist, Dec 03 2006]

Viking hat with wings http://store.malaba...cd493c713d5fa1dadb8
[Dub, Dec 04 2006]

Ceremonial hat with beak http://www.africadi...tsdesc.php?ID=12495
[Dub, Dec 04 2006]

Bird Hats http://thumbs.dream...1429126456Yf92B.jpg
[phundug, Dec 08 2006]

Bird hat (II) http://www.tsuru-bi...er_hooded_male1.jpg
[phundug, Dec 08 2006]

[link]






       Make the wings really adaptive and really aerodynamic so that they are density and shape faded from as hard and thick as possible to as thin and floppy as possible, keeping the wing stiff enough to never bend back on itself and as springy as possile, and you will not need any motor. If you solidly anchor the hat to your head and make the wings perfectly adaptive enough you will be alble to gyroscopically undulate yourself through the air.
JesusHChrist, Dec 04 2006
  

       Well if'n that don't just put a feather in your cap.   

       A few feathers in the hat, no problem, but half a bird? I'm sorry but it seems too close to what's left of roadkill. I think it would fade like the pet rock. What will you do when rich people start wanting the "real thing"?
twitch, Dec 04 2006
  

       Baseball caps already have bills.
Helixthecat, Dec 04 2006
  

       My original idea was that the wings would be reverse engineered so that instead of providing lift, they would force the hats further down on the heads of wearers on a windy day - inspired by a blowy weekend here.
xenzag, Dec 04 2006
  

       what works for birds can work for hats
xenzag, Dec 04 2006
  

       Sounds great! Can't wait to be the first person on the block with a chicken hat. Course, mine will be be modified to include chicken feet to grip my ears so I won't have to worry about a windy day.
tatju, Dec 07 2006
  

       Buffalo wings sound awfully heavy to me. Course, I guess you could always to hang gliding.
tatju, Dec 07 2006
  
      
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