Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Centipede-to-Earthworm converter

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Those creepy-crawly house centipedes with dozens of legs and so many antennas that you can't even tell which end is the front?


Since the dawn of evolution, man has been setting his sights on converting the lowly centipede into a creature worthy of our acknowledgement. The C-to-E converter is an upside-down, plastic, quart-sized container with a centrifuge on the inside: place it upon a centipede on the floor or the wall or ceiling. An air pump sucks it in and the centrifuge pins it to the sides of the container while electronic pulses slowly cause all the thin legs to fall off.

When you are finished, you will have a short but effective soil-turning, garden-improving earthworm plus 100 or so small legs, which make a great pizza topping.

phundug, Apr 25 2003

Whole lotta silk. http://www.paulnoll...agri-silk-cart.html
Big bunch of it. [ty6, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 06 2004]


       <obligatory cruelty to animals posting>
DrCurry, Apr 25 2003

       Those scutigerans are very cool beasts. Think of all the microscopic scabies, mites and spiders they are devouring for you.
bungston, Apr 25 2003

       I think you must be referring to a hectopede. A centipede would only have a hundredth of a foot.   

       And what about those of us who still cling to the "English" system? Could I get one that converts straight from inchworm to earthworm without intermediate conversions to and from metric?
beauxeault, Apr 25 2003

       EVIL! EVIL! BE GOOD TO BUGS! DON'T PURPOSELY HURT THEM! I know DrC did this already, but i don't care.
igirl, Apr 25 2003

       This device would save me a lot of time, as well as not having to clean my tweezers as often.
roby, Apr 25 2003

       <blamsquish><sqrape>Don't worry, it's biodegradable. When it works its way back up the food chain, it'll be a *real* earthworm, not a cripple.
lurch, Apr 26 2003

       If you go to time of expense of worm conversion, why not make it a silkworm. The Chinese cross bred this critter so it makes it's cocoon from a single strand of, well, silk. Unroll enough cocoons and they'll beat a road to your door.
ty6, Apr 26 2003


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