Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Replace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...

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Coin Change Eliminating Charity Roulette Wheel

"Ok, do you want your $1.63 in change or do you want to go for $3?"
  [vote for,

Rather than getting a handful of obnoxious, worthless coin change from your transaction, you have the option to spin the roulette wheel or wheel of fortune that gives you a 1 in 3 chance of roughly doubling your money. (It would round to the nearest dollar) If you win, you get about double your money back in handy paper form and no usless antiquated coins. If you loose, the money goes to charity. Either way you get rid of annoying coins. Everybody wins.
doctorremulac3, Jan 10 2014

Spare Change Lottery Spare_20Change_20Lottery
prior art? [bungston, Jan 11 2014]

Stochastic rounding Stochastic_20rounding
Similar - pachinko style [Loris, Jan 11 2014]

Remucon industries happy puppy donation page http://www.cutestpa...r-girlfriend-smile/
Your donation will make these puppies VERY happy. [doctorremulac3, Jan 13 2014]

My namesake http://www.youtube....watch?v=kYGN2FTNmV8
Not me unfortunately. I friggin' love this guy. [doctorremulac3, Jan 13 2014]


       [+] You might be able to give slightly better than even odds (overall) seein' as the business gets the tax deduction for the charitable donation.
FlyingToaster, Jan 10 2014

       Good in principle, but who uses cash often enough anymore to make this worthwhile to roll out the machines?   

       I'd recommend just setting the odds based on the ratio of your bet and do it electronically, skipping the slow spinning roulette wheel. Then this might roll out as a software update to the cash registers.   

       One issue is that this does have to be weighted so the house (charity) always wins, but since the money is comming from the customers, the store can't claim the tax deduction.   

       Now if we took charities out of the equations and the store gave even odds for whatever bet you were making, everyone would break even on average. The store clerks wouldn't have to spend the time counting change and I wouldn't need to carry it around. We'd probably need to change the gambling laws to allow this, but that seems reasonable since this isn't gambling so much as using probability rather than coins to keep track of fractional dollars.   

       One issue is canceled transactions or returns. If I buy a $0.25 candy. 3/4 of the time it is free. When it rings up as $1 if I say never mind and walk away, what happens? Well, the simple solution is that I have to show the $1 first before opting to bet my change. Then if I walk out without purchasing, it's shoplifting. If after buying the item (and paying the dollar) I really do want to return the item, that can be handled as a separate transaction, but when I return the item I either get $0.25 back or a get a 1/4 chance of getting $1.   

       Another problem is regulating and ensuring that the machines actually are fair.
scad mientist, Jan 10 2014

       This would probably be a little digital dohicky program connected to the existing credit card swiper. When you paid with cash, after you gave the clerk your money it would light up and say something like "POWZOWIE! WANNA PLAY DOUUUBLE YOUR MONEY BACK?!" (yes) (no)   

       If you pushed (yes) it would show a little graphic of a wheel spinning and landing on WINNER! or "Your change is helping starving puppies."   

       As far as returns, you'd be able to receive what you paid for the item minus your change which became part of a totally separate transaction. Your receipt would reflect this and still be usable for returns as with any other receipt the only difference it having a record of the gambling transaction. This would also document your gambling winnings or charitable deductions (depending on if you won or lost) for tax purposes.
doctorremulac3, Jan 11 2014

       "Your change is helping starving puppies!"   

       Can be construed helping hungry puppies, or helping to starve puppies.   

       Maybe after your first spin another 50/50 spin determines if you help them or hurt them.   

       Help burning rainforests! 50/50   

       Help decaying historical buildings! 50/50
rcarty, Jan 11 2014

       Better - instead of winning $1 for your 0.63, you get a lottery ticket!
bungston, Jan 11 2014

       Not a bad idea.
doctorremulac3, Jan 12 2014

       Around the holidays, a lot of stores do the *round up to nearest dollar* and it gets donated to the food banks. I like the idea of maybe getting some myself. +
xandram, Jan 12 2014

       "Your change is helping starving puppies."

and thus by inference:

"By winning, you will cause puppies to starve."

I'm available to do the marketing for this, if you want.
hippo, Jan 13 2014

       I'll try re-writing it to make it clearer.   

       "Your change will go to reducing hindering of the stopping of puppy starvation alleviation cessation elimination."
doctorremulac3, Jan 13 2014

       Actually, it's one of the joys of the English language that a phrase such as "Your change is helping starving puppies" can be read to mean either:

"Your change is helping (to alleviate the) starving (of) puppies"


"Your change is helping (in the) starving (of) puppies"

[Edit: I see that [rcarty] actually said this first, now I've read his anno properly.]
hippo, Jan 13 2014

       Well, starving is an adjective not a verb in this sentence. It's saying that the starving puppies are being assisted, not that the assistance is being given to the process of puppy starvation. The latter would be written: "Your change is helping TO starve puppies." "Your change helps starve puppies." or the rather slogany: "Your change starves puppies." The starvation is simply the current state of the subject. Starving, the adjective, (not verb) could be replaced with "blue" as in "Your donation helps blue dogs." You could say that blue in this case is a verb not an adjective as in "Hey Clem, did you finish bluing them dogs?" but context has to be taken into consideration. Also, to keep the word "starving" in the sentence you'd need to say: "Your change helps THE starving OF puppies."   

       There's also an inference made by use of the word "helps". Furthering their starvation isn't assistance. If you said: "I saw a guy drowning so I helped him." this wouldn't invoke an image of you throwing him an anchor. Well, hopefully anyway.   

       We at Remucon Happy Chubby Adorable Puppies International LLC apologize for any confusion. (Please see link to our website.) Please note that unlike other animal protection organizations, your donation will go DIRECTLY to the actual animal shown. Simply click on the animal of your choice and donate $100,000, $50,000 as little as ten thousand dollars to these adorable animals. You will receive a glossy photo, suitable for framing, showing Doctorremulac3 himself sitting on a pile of cash holding the puppy of your choice along with a very professionally written legal document showing that your money is property of the puppy you've selected and that it is simply being managed by Remucon industries. Please note: Remucon industries will not hurt these adorable puppies in any way should you not donate but, hey, things happen.
doctorremulac3, Jan 13 2014

       I think 'starving' is being used as a gerund rather than an adjective but my point is that it can be read as a present participle as well. For example, the phrase "Your donation is helping bringing World Peace" is a clumsy construction. However, the word 'bringing' is obviously a participle indicating how 'starving' in "Your change is helping starving puppies" can be interpreted as a participle.
hippo, Jan 13 2014

       Hey, that half semester of community college is really paying off.   

       I KID! I KID! (Really Hippo, I'm just kidding, you may be right.)   

       But seriously, I left school at 16 to further my education so I probably shouldn't even kid people about their ed creds. To be clear, as I've said on previous occasions, I'm a doctor like Colonel Sanders is a military leader. While on the subject, to further clarify, I'm not THE obsessive compulsive Doctor Remulac from the Howard Stern show. I was just listening to that routine the day I picked a name for my online persona and doctorremulac, doctorremulac1 and docturremulac2 was already taken. And as it turns out, I spelled it wrong anyway. It's Doctor Remulak with a k.   

       But really, do feel free to send me money if you like any of the puppies in the pictures.
doctorremulac3, Jan 13 2014


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