h a l f b a k e r yMagical moments of mediocrity.
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Would this discourage or encourage drunken theft? |
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deployed in the thousands it would not matter |
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To you it may be //traffic cones made to resemble lifelike
children//, but to me it says Employment Opportunity. |
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I posted the same idea a few years ago.... I called it something like Frolicking Traffic Cones.... I'm actually too lazy to see if I kept it or deleted it. |
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Hmmm. I thought it would be children made (costume? hydraulic press?) to look like traffic cones. |
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"Children of the Cone" - Steven King |
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They are easily confused. Just yesterday I saw what I thought was a traffic cone doing some pretty impressive stuff with a yo-yo. |
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[pertinax], you get the weekly anno award. |
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Yes, all I ever see is traffic cones left still standing whilst hundreds, no, thousands of school children lay motionless in the street. If only those cones had looked like children and children like cones, this horror would never have happened. |
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I think [21Q] may have also been confused by the fake town scene in Blazing Saddles. |
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/The result will be drivers mistaking real children for cones, and child fatalities will increase./ |
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I wonder about the driving habits which lead drivers to intentionally run over cones. I understand how I personally came to these habits but I did not realize that the practice was so widespread. |
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I would like to propose that mounting plywood children on springs would allow them to bob in a lifelike manner. I suspect these "Children of the Road" would come to be adorned with creative hatwear, lost mittens, magic markered facial hair and large nostrils, and other addenda that could only improve their efficacy. |
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This is baked, sort of. A school across the city has bollards in the shape of fairly realistic children outside. I'll see if i can find a picture. |
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Are the children themselves endowed with bollards? |
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I don't think fatalities would increase based on 21's mechanism. Instead, people would freak out, swerve to avoid the Cone Child, and crash in flames. A main design motif of the cone is that you aren't supposed to hit it, but if you do nothing too bad is going to happen. Hitting children doesn't bear the same blasé feel. |
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"Children of the Traffic Circle" |
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Good pic, [Jinbish]. I spent a while looking for one on the grounds that i didn't really fancy walking over there just for that purpose. Thanks. I'll get one next week. |
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Just had a thought about this actually. The bollards in [jinbish]'s picture all seem to be white, but the ones i'm thinking of have various ethnicities. Is that racist? |
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//Is that racist// which - all white, or various ethnicities? |
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Yes - only white children will be protected, apparently only albinos in fact. |
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Yes - only white children will be mistaken for bollards and mown down. |
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Yes - non-white bollards will be seen as racist caricatures of real non-white children. |
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Yes - mixed ethnicities will be perceived as "political correctness gone maaaaaaaaaaaad". |
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<Furiously shovels coal into firebox of steamroller> |
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I haven't been able to find a link, but I am *sure* I have seen child-shaped, yellow barriers that look like the paper cutouts you can make by snipping folded paper. They looked like childrenand were stackable/foldable. |
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I can foresee joy riders reenacting Paul Bartel's Death Race 2000. |
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(Nah, that's just wrong.) |
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The child-shaped bollards are permanent, attached to the qirb. |
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Creative spelling award to Nineteenthly. |
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Thanks. The problem is, i can't remember which is the British and which the Commonwealth spelling, so i use my own. |
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I was also thinking that you could make them stackable, then selectively breed people to look like traffic cones. Can't use genetic engineering because this is the Halfbakery. |
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Great idea. I assume they'll have numbers on them so you can keep score. |
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