Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Apply directly to forehead.

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Crash Lottery

Get in an accident, win a prize!
  (+5, -3)
(+5, -3)
  [vote for,
against]

Bob was driving down the highway, minding his own business, when *WHAM* a car smacks into him.

Bob was badly hurt, but all he could think of was "OH GOODIE! I hope I win something good!"

As he struggled upright, he wiped the blood out of his eyes an tried to see what he'd won. But before he could find his glasses, the paramedics arrived. They attemped to get him out of the car, but he struggled against them, wanting to look at his airbag.

"LET ME SEE! LET ME SEE!" he screamed, taking a swing at a paramedic and lurching back to his car, where he got a glimpse of the words printed on an airbag, and the rating on the crash accelerometer.

He smiled peacefully and let the doctors put him in the ambulance, pleased that he had won a free cruise.

DesertFox, Oct 28 2005

Instant win airbags http://www.theonion...tors_introduces_new
yep, November 5, 1996 [skinflaps, Jan 14 2010]

[link]






       Bob died. This isn't funny.
gnomethang, Oct 28 2005
  

       But Bob was an organ donor, and the cruise was divided up among the people who benefitted from his selfless donation.
normzone, Oct 28 2005
  

       Who's gonna pay for it?
gnomethang, Oct 28 2005
  

       When Bob bought his car, he paid a surcharge. He had the option of having an advertising banner scroll across his headlights, but he'd heard that those things could cause accidents when people tried to read them while driving.
normzone, Oct 29 2005
  

       uhmm ... I don't know how you managed one of those "surprise" chocolate boxes that you are suppose to open one at a time before christmas ... I opened them all and ate them all in one day... I'm sure I'd do the same with my airbag ... no fish for making me giggle at least.
ixnaum, Oct 29 2005
  
      
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