Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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De-Energising Drink

A drink that does the opposite of what an energy drink is supposed to do
(+2, -2)
  [vote for,

After spending the weekend in the presence of my brother-in-laws children, I pondered on the possibility of a de-energising drink. If you could zap the energy of the little blighters, life would be so much more peaceful.

Loserade? Dead Bull?

ThomasEdison, Jan 13 2003


       //De-energising drink//   

       Cognac? Cough-medicine? Opium?   

       OTOH, maybe not on kids.
FloridaManatee, Jan 13 2003

       Blood letting? (sorry).
st3f, Jan 13 2003

       leeches. hmm yes thats what dad called us.
po, Jan 13 2003

       Heh. Immoral and quite possibly illegal, but a wonderful idea. (+).
egbert, Jan 13 2003

       I still prefer the good old fashion method: rope, gags and convenient immovable object or car roof rack. This might help those with insomnia get to sleep easier.
talen, Jan 13 2003

       How about an orange flavoured diazepine-laden soft drink called "Slumpy Delight" ?   

       It's a good idea as far as it goes and I can see it being extended over a whole range of child-attractive foodstuffs. However, it doesn't quite have the appeal of a collar or belt which administers a severe electric shock if the little bu88ers run about or make too much noise (or whenever you push the button on the remote control, heh heh heh).   

       Had I a million croissants to bestow, I would give them all to you. Sadly, I have but one.
8th of 7, Jan 13 2003

       [8th], electric shocks just cause more noise.
egbert, Jan 13 2003

       I like. I have this vivid memory of the British Olympic-gold-winning decathelete, Daly Thomson in a TV advert for 'Lucozade' sports drink.   

       He is at the starting blocks of a sprint. The direcor cuts back and forward between him preparing to leave the blocks and a traffic light set. All to the fantastic tune of 'Phantom of the Opera' by Iron Maiden.   

       Now transpose this (with very same rousing theme music) to a very lazy couch potato reaching for the TV remote control but finding it too difficult a task.   

       Well worth a croissant.
Jinbish, Jan 13 2003

       After a recent similar experience I pondered the idea of a toddler tranquilizer gun, but refrained from posting it. It would be rather handy though.
X2Entendre, Jan 13 2003

RayfordSteele, Jan 13 2003

       Warm milk?
snarfyguy, Jan 13 2003

       Some kind of insulin inhibitor, to induce temporary hyperglycemia. In a can. Blackcurrant-flavoured, for preference.   

       As a diabetic man, I can attest to the severe drowsiness which results from overly high levels of blood glucose. It would work a treat.
friendlyfire, Jan 13 2003

       <<shudder>> One can only hope that all of this is satire.
half, Jan 13 2003

       I love babies but I couldn't eat a whole one :)
po, Jan 13 2003

       I once drank eight red bulls in one night. The air conditioning was off and I started to sweat it out. I reeked of red bull for the next day and a half. It's like garlic that way.   

       I haven't had any since.
banksean, Jan 13 2003

       //One can only hope that all of this is satire//   

       I can just see this comeing back to haunt us in court.   

       Lawyer: Did you, Mister Manatee, or did you not, under an assumed name, participate in an internet forum concerning the abuse of children by controlled substances?   

       FM: Er... It was satire.   

       Lawyer: And did you not yourself suggest supplying these substances to a child?   

       FM: Er... It was satire.   

       Lawyer: Well, the plaintiff, Mister Snarfyguy, had no way of knowing. He overdosed his child on Opium and warm milk!   

       FM: Er... maybe it was the milk?   

FloridaManatee, Jan 13 2003

       Croiss for "Dead bull".
madradish, Jan 14 2003

       Warm milk, Ovaltine, camomile tea?   

       Also, a common medication for teething children is gripe water, the main ingredient of which is alcohol.
kropotkin, Jan 14 2003

       Country Music
thumbwax, Jan 14 2003

       Coca Coma
FarmerJohn, Jan 14 2003

madradish, Jan 14 2003

       A lovely fruit drink with a subtle hint of Thorazine [sp] should do the trick...
KLRico, Nov 03 2003

       <no satire intended>Why the hell not? As an adult I regulate my mood up and down using coffee in the morning and often a glass of wine at night to relax. Kids only have the up option through soda. 'course we'd have to find something as safe as caffiene, but if all it does is calm them down I'm all for it. Or we can just kill the caffiene option for kids in the first place, but that's a different issue.</nsi>
Worldgineer, Nov 03 2003


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