Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Decoy Earthmoving Equipment and Gates

We need Chains and we need Chains now.
  [vote for,

There's a protest going on at the moment over a Freeway Extension in my city. Protesters are chaining themselves to earthmoving equipment and gates as a way of impeding work on the project. It takes the police a considerable amount of time and aggravation to cut them free.

My service would be to hire out decoy equipment to be parked on site in such a manner that, after the protesters are securely fastened, the real equipment can get past them to start the project. The units don't have to function so don't require engines etc as they could be towed into position.

AusCan531, Dec 20 2016


       Velociraptors ...
8th of 7, Dec 20 2016

       Just start up the equipment with the hapless hippies still attached. They'll soon get the hint and move on.
Custardguts, Dec 20 2016

       Alternatively, just put a couple of drops of superglue in their padlocks and wait until the weather turns cold.
MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 20 2016

       Quicker, put a few drops of superglue into their nostrils and their lips, and wait until movement ceases.   

       If the climate's warm, what about fire ants ? Cheap, simple, very persuasive.
8th of 7, Dec 20 2016

       //Alternatively, just put a couple of drops of superglue in their padlocks and wait until the weather turns cold.//   

       You've got the wrong end of the globe there Old Chap. It's going to be 41C today. (No fire ants required).
AusCan531, Dec 20 2016

       Just the two-metre diameter convex lens, then ...
8th of 7, Dec 20 2016

       //It's going to be 41C today.//   

       Ah yes, I was forgetting Australia's perverse insistence on having its seasons exactly 180° out of sync. It's not big, and it's not clever.
MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 20 2016

       Love this idea, I'd like to see it carried a step further.   

       Put out fake stories to occupy the self appointed ruling class, finger wagging morality police.   

       "Republicans declare that homeless puppy meat is a valuable protein source that can be sold to the poor for inflated prices to enhance the bank accounts of the rich."   

       Give 'em something to live for and keep 'em busy so they're out of the way while the adults go about the day to day work of running a civilization.   

       Everybody wins.
doctorremulac3, Dec 24 2016


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