h a l f b a k e r y
"My only concern is that it wouldn't work, which I see as a problem."
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Everyone deserves to own a barren spot to fill a void in their life
Many people have been awe struck by
visiting a desert, their eyes squinting
against the blazing light as they scanned
the endless horizons of ever changing, but
seemingly timeless dunes.
With Desert Bonsai, you can now own a
little piece of that same desert to
experience in your own home,
even your car. It consists of a hand made
bowl into which has been placed a sample
of genuine sand from the desert of your
Once you have positioned your Bonsai
bowl, an environmental artist/technician
(possibly myself) will come and sculpt an
individual dune in it using a powerful
blower. Each dune is certified as unique
and unrepeatable. A dried bone fragment,
miniature cattle skull, or shrivelled, dead
cacti stump completes the arrangement.
All you need do now is sit back and watch,
after you have switched on the powerful
heat lamp that mimics the daily action of a
traversing sun, rising at dawn and sinking
to a bright red shimmering orb at dusk.
Desert Bonsai only requires watering once
every ten years and comes with a money
back guarantee that it will grow nothing.
Extra dunes and bleached bones are
available on request.
Mini Zen Garden
Similar - minus the dunes [fridge duck, Jul 19 2006]
||i have always found deserts to be not
happy places. see, they're kinda hot on
average. the heat, the heat can be a bit of
a problem. take away the lamp, and i'll
||I thought: "Desert Bonsai... sounds a bit pedestrian really, now Bonsai Desert - *that* would be an idea". But I read it anyway and Bonsai Desert is exactly what you've described. Have a carefully baked miniature croissant.
||"Crudely made bowl of sand" Be sure to charge at least $299.
||not crudely made.... exquisitely, exotically
fashioned - individual grains positioned to
perfection under magnification using
specially designed sand moving tweezers.
||careful, those tweezers can put tiny scratches on those perfect grains of sand. Perhaps using an electrostatically charged cat whisker would be better.
||You know, if you bake this in a terrarium, with a lizard or two, I'm there.
||I've baked this (sans dune)in a terrarium with lizards.
(2lepoard geckos, 3 bearded dragons) but i guess without the dune, and the finely crafted bowl, this is really just sand.... [+].
||I just question how finely you can sculpt anything
with a powerful blower.
||Check out a hair salon sometime. They seem to sculp with blowers without too many difficulties. Figurative sand sculpture is also a well developed art form. I think a small dune in a bowl could be achieved with comparative ease.
||that zen garden misses the whole point of zen.
||For someone to be able to select which grain of
to move and where to put it with a blower is
preposterous, sorry. And without this type of fine
control how will you prove that any given
unique? I guess you could photograph the thing
and analyze the curve of the dune against a
database or something.. Still, I'm going to be a
little perturbed with the guy who comes into my
house and starts blowing sand all over the floor.
You gonna clean that up? .... Ok, I'm liking the idea
now but hey, I just want to consider using a
surgical robot or something to put on the finishing
||No it isn't. All you need is a nozzle valve that can reliably release one atom of gas at a time.
||//how will you prove that any given sculpture is unique// I
think even if you just dump two piles of sand on a table
haphazedly, the burden of proof is on the guy who asserts
||//All you need is...// Or a very, very large supercomputer.