Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Disorient Express: The Ride

The ultimate roller-coaster
  [vote for,

Somewhere, out in the desert, there's a little amusement park with a big roller-coaster.

You start out on a flat track section, in a small six-person car (3 people per row, with the back row higher than the front row so they can see over the others' heads) enclosed with Lexan, standing up. Once strapped in, the ride begins. The car tilts down to horizontal so that you must look up to see ahead. The car starts moving forward, faster and faster, and you start up a 300-foot incline. You reach the top, and just at the top it stops long enough for you to see what this ride is all about: a 2000+ foot vertical drop, on the face of a cliff, straight into the ground.

Suddenly, the linear motor kicks in. You're rocketed to over 200 mph, then free-falling into the dirt. Scared now? Just when you realize the jig is up, you see that there IS a hole, just big enough for the car. A speedometer at the beginning of the tunnel confirms your speed.

Darkness, but you can feel that the coaster is leveling out. You struggle to see, but can't until you're almost blinded as lights suddenly light up a long section of the tunnel. It's quite hot down here, you think. How deep is this? The answer is provided by a device similar to the speedo. Very deep indeed. You plunge again into darkness, then are pulled up suddenly to vertical. Heading up what seems like an elevator ride, you feel the coaster move back and forth in a series of vertical waves, then shoot up and out into the light-- only to see that the track isn't finished! You're almost 100 feet in the air and running out of track, when you find out from the pulling on your neck that it actually curves around. You're facing up for a moment, then heading towards earth again, then nothing beneath you except dirt, inches from your face.

A few loops and other conventional coaster thrillers, and the ride is over. The coaster stops. Then you realize you're miles from where you started! Another linear motor kicks in, and you rocket right into the cliff face, then straight up in total darkness to-- the real end of the ride.

Now for technical stuff.

The car must be aerodynamically designed to go 200+ MPH, and must have high-speed wheels and bearings. The track is 2 separate rails in places, to allow such complex movements and to let you see the ground, etc.

This project also requires extensive tunneling, and safe tunnels. Also, we must have fail-safe devices in the event of bad things' ocurrence. Parachute if it comes off the track during the vert, brakes if the track fails ahead of the car, good shielding to protect the occupants as much as possible. The sudden turns must not be TOO sudden, to keep people's heads on.

This coaster would be the world's tallest, fastest, and longest by far. Did I mention very expensive?

Anyways, I'D ride it :-D

galukalock, Feb 01 2003

Oblivion http://www.alton-to...areas/xsector.shtml
Vertical-drop coaster at Alton Towers (UK). [JKew, Oct 17 2004]

Ultimate Rollercoasters http://www.ultimaterollercoaster.com
Rollercoaster reviews, etc. Some pretty good ones, even. But none compare with this. [galukalock, Oct 17 2004]


       People who puke on roller-coasters wouldn't be allowed on this, for obvious reasons.
galukalock, Feb 01 2003

       I'd go without food for two days. And take dramamine. And beg.
lurch, Feb 02 2003

       Okay, you can ride it.
galukalock, Feb 02 2003

       I'd ride it too.   

       But it seems to me like most of the effects here -- extreme speed, height, and incline; impending danger; fear; surprise -- are pretty much baked on other coasters by the artful use of psychology and illusion.   

       Also, we're conditioned to accept such illusions; who's going to believe your speedo and altimeter are genuine?   

       I quite like "so deep it's hot", though: voyage through the earth's crust or voyage into hell would both be good themes for a coaster.
JKew, Feb 03 2003

       Go for a ride in a 140Hp Piper Cherokee round the edge of some Cu-Nim. All these thrills and more - something to tell your grandchildren about (if you live).   

       Brown trousers not included.
8th of 7, Feb 03 2003

       i'll ride it if you build it. here's a shovel. start digging.
sambwiches, Feb 03 2003

       I should think the first part would be quite like skydiving without a parachute.   

       //who's going to believe your speedo and altimeter are genuine?//   

       You don't have to. Just about two seconds before the drop you'll KNOW.
galukalock, Feb 03 2003

       For some reason I think it should be called 'The Wile E. Coyote.'   

       I don't think I'd pick a desert for this to operate in. The wheels would be destroyed in just a few hours from the dust, speed, and such.   

       I don't know why they don't have a coaster that tunnels underground. Probably the maintenance and insurance risk, I suppose.
RayfordSteele, Feb 03 2003

       they do. follow the link to the Oblivion coaster. after a vertical plunge (at the top of which you are held - looking down- for about 8 seconds) you enter a pitch-black tunnel before shooting upwards back into the sky. it's quite a ride.
sambwiches, Feb 03 2003

       I chose desert for the setting because of the low humidity, lack of population to 'get in the way', and abundance (in the US) of very tall mesas. You are right about the dust bit, although I'm sure it would take more than hours. You'd have to find a place without much wind.   

       As for tunnels, if you use enough good concrete, there isn't much risk at all. And, in the desert, there isn't all that water to erode the tunnel walls.
galukalock, Feb 03 2003

       Wicked (+)
madradish, Feb 04 2003

       RayfordSteele summed up my Wile E. Coyote view. With that in mind, I'd suggest Sound-effects (heard from waiting area):*peeeeeeeeeerrrrrr..... kabooo* with obligatory dust-cloud in wake of tunnel entry. Perhaps an annoying little road-runner *meep-meep* ^right at^ every nausea-inducing turn to add a little extra tension and offer a nano-second of warning, for legal porpoises.
thumbwax, Feb 04 2003

       In order to elicit full bowel emptying affect, the long periods of blackness should be replaced with snippets of light showing the appearance certain collision and faulty track conditions. also, at some point during a drop, it would be incredibly scarey to mute all sounds of the coaster wheels.
ato_de, Feb 04 2003

       Maybe I should have it stop right after entering the 2nd tunnel?
galukalock, Feb 05 2003

       well I think........................'scuse me, I had to throw up just reading about it. Mission accomplished. Being way out in the desert, you would have to provide transportation to the attraction from a civilized jumping off point. You could incoporate that into the theme.
marymalibu, Feb 06 2003

       This has all the makings of a fantastic disaster movie.
egbert, Feb 06 2003

       He offered to test drive the 'coaster. We let him sit in one of the "Mannequin ejection" seats.   

       It was his choice, it's the way he would have wanted to go. Iw was certainly the way we wanted him to go.
8th of 7, Feb 06 2003

       The 'certain disaster' coaster thing has been done, although very cheesily, at Cedar Point. Ride 'Disaster Transport.' It's the former 'Avalanche Run' bobsled-type coaster redone inside a dark indoor track.
RayfordSteele, Feb 06 2003

       Sounds fun. But it's not quite the same as (the perception of) a half-mile vertical drop into the dirt.
galukalock, Feb 06 2003

       Is there another, less (insert evil adjective here) way for me to elicit improvement suggestions from people? If so, I'm open-minded.
galukalock, Feb 07 2003

       Improvement suggestions eh?
How about this, The first part of the ride is a normal coaster until it plunges into the earth. After some freak outs in the dark, the tunnel becomes clear Pyrex glass and you have the impression of being completely engulfed in flame as you reach the earth’s core. Once the flames die down and everyone’s eyes adjust to the darkness the coaster suddenly resurfaces but underwater, (still in the clear tube), you elude the tentacles of a giant squid, evade a couple of sharks and blast out of the water in a huge geyser illusion.

       I think it would cool too if the seats were, what’s the word? gimbaled? gyroscopic? Anyway the coaster would turn upside down but you would stay upright, and when it turned around, going back the way it came, you would be riding backwards. If the seats were weighted and allowed to swing freely they would spin out of control making for the ultimate upchuck coaster.   

       Wow. That would be GREAT! Yes, I believe gimbaled is the word. That'd scare ANYone! I like. You would have to make sure the tunnel didn't melt in the fire section.   

       Not sure you'd be able to work all that into this coaster, though.
galukalock, Feb 07 2003

       I like 2-fries' ideas, although the watery section sounds a little like "Phantom Menace: The Ride"...   

       Your desert setting might lend itself to some nice illusions by painting the track and supports appropriately to blend in with the landscape and/or sky -- might be able to work the "running out of track" illusion like this.   

       How about sound effects and hydraulics to simulate a derailment followed by a plummetting drop off the apparent line of the track? (A little like the "diving under the ball" illusion in Disneyland's Indiana Jones ride.)
JKew, Feb 08 2003

       [thimble], I 'galukalocked' my own comment out. I don't know what happened to [UB]'s.   

       //painting the track and supports appropriately to blend in with the landscape and/or sky//   

       Yes. That'd be perfect for the part shooting out of the tunnel. I also like the 'derailment' bit. It'd work great in pitch-blackness.
galukalock, Feb 08 2003

       Well, I haven't been here long, so I don't know the unwritten rules yet. I appreciate your explaining them to me, but please use a bit more tact.   

       As for the 'constant comment'-ing, I shall refrain from it in the future. I apologize to those who took offense (offence?) at it.
galukalock, Feb 08 2003

       It wasn't so much you as it was the others who were being a bit tactless, [UB]. But anyway, I've learned the lesson.   

       Thanks for the spelling tip. I've seen it both ways, and I wasn't sure.
galukalock, Feb 08 2003

       \Well, I haven't been here long, so I don't know the unwritten rules yet. I appreciate your explaining them to me, but please use a bit more tact.\\   

       Where's krelnik when you need him?
egbert, Feb 09 2003

       Hah (ouch!)
madradish, Feb 09 2003

       Say, would those who fishboned the idea because of my commenting kindly retract their votes? I don't do that anymore. (Countdown 'til someone claims I just did: 5...4...3...2..)
galukalock, Feb 10 2003

       Yeah, why the fishbones, people? This is imaginative and well written.
egbert, Feb 11 2003

       A 200MPH LIM launch into a 2000 foot vertical drop? The G-forces would crush you like an ant. (For reference, the worlds fastes coaster features a 120MPH launch uphill, and legistics have already proven to be a nightmare). Anyways, most of your ideas have already been taken. Vertical drop into tunnel: Oblivion @ Alton Towers. Coaster on a cliff: Rattler @ Six Flags Fiesta Texas. Face-first "flight": X-Flight Six Flags Ohio or Air at Alton Towers.   

       Well, enough nitpicking - I'll still give you a croissant for trying to come up with a good coaster.   

xer0negative, Mar 18 2004


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