Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Drink Pipeline

Fresh beer tapped straight from the source
  (+6, -4)
(+6, -4)
  [vote for,
against]

We pipeline water. We pipeline natural gas. We pipeline oil. Why don't we pipeline other drinks? The category is beer, but imagine drinking soda or something else straight from a pipe in your house. I guess, at the very least, we could have tap water that doesn't suck as a second pipe in addition to the one more suited price-wise for bathing and cleaning.
kevinthenerd, Dec 04 2007

the custard version Transatlantic_20Custard_20Pipeline
as mentioned in the annos (self-promo) [lurch, Dec 04 2007, last modified Dec 11 2007]

Beer Pipeline http://dcostanet.ne...1/03/beer-pipeline/
baked ! so sorry [keninthenerd] [xenzag, Dec 05 2007]

Beer Pipeline discussion http://groups.googl...=2#9ea4b3674f363640
metering seems to be a problem [xenzag, Dec 05 2007]

enchanted http://www.churchof...hou-shalt-embr.html
I'm really looking forward to taste it sometime! [sweet, Dec 09 2007]

Spingo from the Blue Anchor http://www.spingoales.com/
[angel, Dec 11 2007]

[link]






       How would this work for Real Ale ? Real Ale is either drawn from a barrel by a lift pump, or dispensed from a spigot driven directly into the barrel. No pressure is involved.   

       Subject to a satisfactory explanation, the concept of a tap on the sink or bath that dispenses fresh beer is highly attarctive.
8th of 7, Dec 04 2007
  

       I'm certain we've run the gamut of piped fluids/foods (including custard), but I'll be darned if I can find an existing piped beer idea. Perhaps it/they was/were lost to the bit bucket.
phoenix, Dec 04 2007
  

       Glug ! Glug ! Glug !   

       Now that's what I call a biofuel ...   

       Thniking about it .... if gas pipelines were replaced with ethanol pipelines, homes could receive a liquid fuel which could be used for both vehicles, space heating, cooking, and entertainment .... just add orange juice.   

       <later> have a bun ..
8th of 7, Dec 04 2007
  

       "We pipeline water. We pipeline natural gas. We pipeline oil. Why don't we pipeline other drinks?" Because a lot of us don't drink natural gas or oil. Drinks are pipelined through thousands, if not millions of kilometers of pipe, as we speak. This idea suffers from the "last mile" problem. The distribution problem for beer and other beverages has been adequately solved in its current embodiment. Now custard, on the other hand...
4whom, Dec 04 2007
  

       // a lot of us don't drink natural gas or oil. //   

       <looks suspiciously at 4whom>   

       "Yew naat bee from round these parts, bee yee ?"
8th of 7, Dec 04 2007
  

       I think there was a world's record for shortest pipeline, based on some feller living next door to a brewery. Otherwise, we have transport systems pretty well worked out with kegs and bottles and all (though I'd like to see less waste). I'm sure the idea of pipelines occurs to liquid purveyors and purchasers quite often. [ ]
baconbrain, Dec 04 2007
  

       [baconbrain], I'm sorry to have to report that major brewers are still trying to come up with a viable postmix system for beer. That would mean that the beer would be shipped as a concentrated "syrup" like those used for cola, lemonade and other postmix drinks, then remixed with treated, carbonated water at the point of dispense. This would saave on the cost of moving round a product that is 94% water.   

       This is of course anathema to all true lovers of beer.
8th of 7, Dec 04 2007
  

       //This is of course anathema to all true lovers of beer.//   

       Oh I dunno. I love beer, and I like the thought of having 3 taps at my kitchen sink. One for hot water, one for cold, and one for 'beer concentrate'. [+]
jtp, Dec 05 2007
  

       I thought Vegemite was beer concentrate.
baconbrain, Dec 05 2007
  

       [8th of 7] But many major brewers use the source of water as a selling point. Although larger microbrew stores will sell you water treatment packs, which will turn your tap water (or distilled water) into properly mineralized 'mountain' water. Whether you want swiss or german mountain water or swiss-german mountain water.   

       About the pipeline, I'd be worried about contamination. Beer is partly yeast food. Not just humans like to eat it. Drains would soon clog up with all kinds of gunk bathing in the fresh beer passing through.
mylodon, Dec 05 2007
  

       The answer to that might be to pipe only high strenth beers or barley wines, where the alcohol content is high enough to be "self-disinfecting".   

       Hence the advantages of pumping 94% ethanol.
8th of 7, Dec 05 2007
  

       Huh. Isn't there a way to condense natural gas down to a liquor? We might have the distribution already completed.   

       You just need a fancy tap, that converts regular natural gas, to natural liquor.   

       Then, maybe slide on 'beer flavor' filters, for beer-flavored natural liquor.
mylodon, Dec 05 2007
  

       // Isn't there a way to condense natural gas down to a liquor? //   

       Yes.. but it requires very high pressures, hence big thick expensive pipes. Much better to have a volatioe, environmentally-friendly fuel that's a liquid in the normal-ish range of temepratures where humans live ...
8th of 7, Dec 05 2007
  

       //Isn't there a way to condense natural gas down to a liquor?//
But what does it taste like?
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Dec 05 2007
  

       Well, it's natural, so it tastes like brown rice. And it gives you gas.
baconbrain, Dec 05 2007
  

       Carbon Dioxide is corrosive to plumbing fixtures and bacteria grow exponentially on sugar. This is why soda and beer are sealed in a bottle and kept refrigerated.
quantum_flux, Dec 05 2007
  

       // Carbon Dioxide is corrosive to plumbing fixtures //   

       That depends on what they're made of.   

       // and bacteria grow exponentially on sugar. //   

       Only if there's enough water present.   

       // This is why soda and beer are sealed in a bottle //   

       Beer is kept in a bottle to prevent oxidation.   

         

       // and kept refrigerated //   

       Not necessary until after the bottle is opened. /
8th of 7, Dec 05 2007
  

       ...and then, why bother?   

       Electricity main, gas main, water main, and beer main. Sounds sensible. Can I have a chow main for when I get hungry?
Srimech, Dec 09 2007
  

       //and bacteria grow exponentially on sugar//   

       Qualify please. My understanding was that pure sugar was an excellent disinfectant. It's all to do with osmotic pressure. It's certainly a decent short-term wound dressing, in the absence of anything better.   

       I'm also a little curious which metals are corroded by CO2. It's pretty inert stuff, y'know. Carbonic acid, yeah, but it's pretty weak.
Custardguts, Dec 09 2007
  

       Beer piped to my kitchen sink would be such an advantage that I'd be happy with even very poor tasting beer.
vincevincevince, Dec 09 2007
  

       //Why don't we pipeline other drinks?// Because beer is, at least sometimes, holy.   

       see link.
sweet, Dec 09 2007
  

       i think if you load things down with sugar, it dries things out and becomes a preservative.   

       but if it is moderately dispersed in another medium, i.e. beer, it is a very tasty food for all kinds of things.   

       the whole point of the beer brewing process is to break grains down into sugar, which are then attacked by yeast and bacteria.   

       but if you dropped a packet of fleischmans dry yeast in a box of C&H cane sugar, no i don't think you'll be getting any kind of drink out of it.
mylodon, Dec 09 2007
  

       Wow, who would want the skunk beer that would finally come out of the best kept pipelines? Have you ever had beer from a tap where they don't clean the lines periodically? i used to work for Bud and that is pretty bad to begin with, but man, once you pump it thru miles of non-temperature controlled piping, it would be delicious.
MisterQED, Dec 09 2007
  

       [MisterQED]. This is beer on tap in your home we are talking about. Taste deficiencies can be neglected for such an impressive end result.
vincevincevince, Dec 09 2007
  

       //Wow, who would want the skunk beer that would finally come out of the best kept pipelines? Have you ever had beer from a tap where they don't clean the lines periodically? i used to work for Bud and that is pretty bad to begin with, but man, once you pump it thru miles of non-temperature controlled piping, it would be delicious.//   

       Having periodically cleaned the three to six feet of tubing inside condensed drink dispensers, I can assure you that the end result will begin to resemble "african millet beer" after about the first thirty feet.   

       You see the nozzles on those soda drink dispensers? I was the only one at work who would clean those. After a week of absence, I took one off, and... Well, have you ever tried stopping up a bloody nose, and then when you remove the tissue, a blood clot comes with it? Something like that, only black, came out of each nozzle. They ranged in length from six inches to a foot long.
ye_river_xiv, Dec 10 2007
  

       If the beer is really going to spoil, and people are going to complain, then we could have some natty pipeline in which cans of beer travel, and to obtain one you just pull a lever and the next one past drops down instead of going onward.
vincevincevince, Dec 10 2007
  

       I'll assume that the pipeline is 15mm in diameter - it could be more or less but the ratio of surface area to cross-section affects the flow-rate and therefore the transmission pressure required, and 15mm seems like a reasonable compromise, as well as being a standard pipe size. My beer of choice (and contrary to [custard]'s implication, beer varies enormously from one brew to another) is brewed 450 miles away from my home, and nowhere else. There will thus be over 600,000 pints in the pipe at any one time, equivalent to around 2,000 barrels. This is 200 times the capacity of the brewery.

Even if the brewery were 100 yards away, there would still be nine and a half gallons in the pipeline.
angel, Dec 11 2007
  

       Oh, that makes me thirsty.
mylodon, Dec 11 2007
  

       And what beer is that, [angel]?
wagster, Dec 11 2007
  

       Teenagers would be tapping the pipe all up and down the line.
nomocrow, Dec 11 2007
  

       //And what beer is that, [angel]?//

(Linky)
angel, Dec 11 2007
  

       Teenagers would be tapping the pipe all up and down the line.
nomocrow, Dec 11 2007
  

       One concern that I have is the actual brand of beer. Is there going to be a standard for piped beer? Some like Heineken while others like Miller light. And then what about Colt 45? How will one be able to enjoy a premium german lager when their preference is malt liquor?
Jscotty, Dec 11 2007
  
      
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