Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Dude Startup

  (+10, -4)
(+10, -4)
  [vote for,

A "dude ranch" is an establishment where unskilled guests pay money to live the rough-and-tumble life of a real cowboy under guidance from experienced ranch hands.

At the dude startup, even the computer-illiterate can now similarly share the romance and enthusiasm of a well-funded software startup.

Packages are available to cater to different tastes:

CODE MONKEY: Cubicle with cot. Car pool. Access to the corporate game console and library; when middle management drops by, simply demo whatever it is you're playing at the time and pretend you wrote it. Free snacks and caffeinated sodas from a machine in the hallway. After 6 o'clock, speed-metal karaoke on the office boom-box.

MIDDLE MANAGER: Windowless office with couch. Segway pool. Free back rubs; personal inflatable yoga ball. Try to get the "front-end" and the "back-end" teams to talk to each other - if that doesn't work out, throw something electronic against the wall; seriously, that's why we put that projector there. Access to espresso machine and salad bar. After 6 o'clock, snort speed off the office boom-box.

CEO: Corner office with view. Lap pool. Personal gourmet chef. Free makeover; suit, hair-styling, spray-on tan. Show off your new 'do at golfing lessons in small groups with other CEOs. In the late afternoons, take a relaxing stroll down the tastefully swerving corridor to share your vision of the next marketing campaign, tweak the color scheme for the new logo, or just go all-out and change the company name and product! At 6 o'clock, speed past the office in your boxster.

jutta, Mar 03 2007

Year_202500_3a_20In...enactment_20Society ...in the future... [hippo, Mar 03 2007]


       Please find my application for CEO in your mailbox. +
xandram, Mar 03 2007

       Can I bring my video camera, wear my insect costume and be the fly on the wall making a documentary ? Pleeease ? (stops typing to shoo rival bug off croissant)
xenzag, Mar 03 2007

       Usually, the purpose of a dude ranch is to wring another stream of income from the on-going operations. What will the daily/weekly/monthly accomodation fees generate from Code Monkey, Middle Manager, and CEO reservations? How many individuals can the "ranch" serve at any one time? Will the "dudes" just be play-acting, or will any actual work get done to produce ranch revenue beyond the collection of guest fees? Can multiple CEOs inhabit the ranch simultaneously, and if so, how? Will Middle Manager guests ever want to book a return visit at any price?
jurist, Mar 03 2007

       At the Dude Ranch, nobody gets to be rancher: they're all greenhorns pretending to be cowpunchers. At the Dude Startup 404's would pretend to be microserfs and seagulls, nobody would get to be CEO.
nuclear hobo, Mar 03 2007

       Everyone always wants to pile on the CEO. I'll have you know tweaking logos is not all that easy +
theircompetitor, Mar 03 2007

       My dude VCs might come and visit your dude startup soon. All the dude code monkeys will have to practise getting excited about stock options and the dude CEO will have to practise backdating them.
hippo, Mar 03 2007

       Also known as a Cube Ranch.
nuclear hobo, Mar 04 2007

       Isn't this what half of California was doing for half of the 1990s?
Galbinus_Caeli, Mar 05 2007

       Dude ranch? Who came up with that name? Sounds almost as scary as the Isle of Man.
spiraliii, Mar 06 2007

       In Isle of Man, Douglas enters you!
zen_tom, Mar 06 2007


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