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Employ Helium To Make Religious Orators More Interesting

The name says it all.
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Religious services are boring. You sit there and listen to the pastor/minister/priest/dude at the podium run thousand year old stories and try not to fall asleep.

A helium tank mounted within the podium with a hose leading up to the mic stand allows the orator a hasty inhale before spouting a particularly important quote from the Bible, perhaps something about sinning or smiting, perhaps from Jesus himself.

whatrock, Jun 12 2020

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       this should be required for all political speeches. How much better would debates be with this...
theircompetitor, Jun 12 2020
  

       //Religious services are boring// You don't actually have to attend, you know.
pocmloc, Jun 12 2020
  

       ^^^   

       Also, sulfur hexafluoride.
tatterdemalion, Jun 13 2020
  

       Maybe some hidden cannibis in the incense?
RayfordSteele, Jun 13 2020
  

       I didn't even know that Helium was hard up for work...   

       It's work shy.
nineteenthly, Jun 14 2020
  

       Rarefied air of the high moral ground.
wjt, Jun 14 2020
  

       Fill the entire church/synagogue/place of worship with pure helium, so everyone sounds silly! (May require reinforcing the roof and windows...)
neutrinos_shadow, Jun 15 2020
  

       “Fill the entire place with pure helium“
And the entire congregation will be dead of inert gas asphyxiation faster than they can sing the first line of “Nearer, My God, To Thee”...
kdf, Jun 15 2020
  

       Here lie um
wjt, Jun 15 2020
  

       [kdf]; that wasn't my plan. No, definitely not. Never crossed my mind...
neutrinos_shadow, Jun 15 2020
  

       "that wasn't my plan..."
Right. Sounds like something the borg would have offered. But he'd have suggested HCN for the recessional.
kdf, Jun 15 2020
  
      
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