Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Gentle Goose Gitoff

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Many folk enjoy the majestic sight of Canada geese winging through the sky in formation. Nice! And many folk enjoy getting a closer look at these magnifcent creatures as they rest in parklands along the way. Perhaps they even toss some bread to them and bask in the warm charitable glow, and/or watch them squabble and honk to get the crusts. Nice! And many folk trying to take a walk through the park step in slimy green goose poop as they innocently wander down paved paths. Not nice!

Enter the Gentle Goose Gitoff. This system works on the same principle as an electric fence, providing a gentle shock to encourage animals to leave.

Unlike an electric fence, it's low and discontinuous - a bunch of little poles, eerily similar to path lights of those round pulleys that are supposed to make it easier to drag a garden hose around corners and actually provide a wonderful place for the hose to knot and then chip up when you forget they're there and run over them with a lawnmower. Place them along the sides of any hard path surface where geese might otherwise wander, at careful intervals such that geese cannot push between them, but humans can step between them (or over them).

Geese will still inhabit the parks. But they will not inhabit the paths. Unless they happen to land there, but then perhaps the lack of food will drive them to take off again. We hope. A trapped, angry goose is not a pretty sight.

gisho, Dec 09 2011


       this title is so ambiguous.
po, Dec 09 2011

       I am intrigued by the GGGG, in all its manifestations. Bun for ambiguity, earnestness and gentle gentility.
bungston, Dec 09 2011


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