Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Guys cook.

Maybe, maybe not.
  (+2, -6)
(+2, -6)
  [vote for,

This would be a reality type contest show called "Guys cook." It would be a Bravo channel type thing. These would be single young guys, not openly gay although orientation is not the point of the show.

These guys would be asked to prepare the best meal they can for a panel of judges, selected for hoightiness and toightyness. The show would open with a talk with the contestant, who he is and what he does and his thoughts, such as they are, about cooking. A quick tour of his residence and look in the fridge. The guy would be introduced to the show kitchen. The guy would go shopping for ingredients, then make something. The judges would pass judgement, Sometimes it would be pure comedy. Sometimes the unlikely dude might produce amazing results. The problem with cooking shows is that the contestants know how to cook. I want to root for the underdog. I want to see him explain what he is trying to do as he does it, like the TV chefs do. I want him to crank the country music in the kitchen. I want to cheer for the working man who has secret knowledge of an ancient and awesome chili recipe. I want to cheer for the clueless dude who ruins everything but gets a strong C+ for his jello pudding with butterscotch chips. I want to see a fancy food critic, mouth full, say "you know, this pudding abomination is pretty good."

bungston, Nov 25 2009

The next swedish chef. The_20next_20swedish_20chef
inspiration... [bungston, Nov 25 2009]


       On a whim I bought my first duck last night. All suggestions welcomed.
normzone, Nov 25 2009

       make sure it quaks like a duck
theircompetitor, Nov 25 2009

       A whole duck or just the breasts? Because the breasts are fantastic lightly pan-fried. You want it pink in the middle.
Germanicus, Nov 25 2009

       Um, as a guy in your target participant range who is a pretty decent cook, I think there are some assumptions in here that are a little unfair.
MechE, Nov 25 2009

       Ya think? [-] Cliché stew with cliché a la cliché. It's sure to sell, but do you really want to waste your time with this pap?
jutta, Nov 25 2009

       //On a whim I bought my first duck last night. All suggestions welcomed.//   

       Kill it and eat it.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 25 2009

       I mean kill it, *cook it* and eat it.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 25 2009

       mmmm pap. The thing must be heavy on the cliche but one has to let the pappy sweetness come through. I interpret "sure to sell" as highest praise for a TV show concept.   

       MechE, the show would surely need to include one or two guys nicknamed "Mech" who fancy themselves chefs and take umbrage at the suggestion that they might be anything but. Uproarious, kitchen-destroying failure, standing ovations and demands for third helpings both TV worthy. Especially if you can have both with the same guy in the same episode.
bungston, Nov 25 2009

       A whole duck. Dead already, I'm pretty sure, or else it's faking well by removing all it's feathers and head in order to blend in.   

       A la orange looks boring. Alice B Toklas recipes all seem to be about making a sauce, nothing about cooking the duck. I suspect that may be the rule, but I've yet to get on the interweb to check it out yet.   

       My base instinct is to barbecue, but I'd like to conserve all the fat, which is supposed to be insturmental in many recipes and produce the greatest french fries ever.
normzone, Nov 25 2009

       Just roast it. Make sure the skin is dry to begin with, and make sure you finish it on a high heat to crisp it.   

       Use the fat to make proper roast potatos (peel and cut so as to leave lots of pointy corners; parboil; fluff the surfaces by shaking; fry in very hot duck fat until brown; then finish in the oven).   

       Finally, make a giblet gravy as you would for chicken.   

       If you try an orange sauce, keep it separate in case it all goes badly wrong. Most orange sauces are too sweet or too acidic.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 25 2009

       If you stuff some spices in the fat before roasting the flavor will mix into the meat (eg: rosemary, thyme, bay leaf). You could put potatoes under the duck and let the fat drip on them on the way down.   

       If you grill it you will need to do over indirect heat or the fat will incinerate the thing. You could use a rotisserie.
bungston, Nov 25 2009

       //You could put potatoes under the duck and let the fat drip on them on the way down.//   

       Nooooooo! That is cruel!! If you want proper roasties, crunchy on the outside and fluffy on the inside, they have to be cooked thrice (parboiled; shallow-fried; finally roasted).   

       And I would respectfully query the use of bay with duck. That would only be done by someone who pronounces herbs "erbs".
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 25 2009

       In cold weather, when you want something really rich, you can do duck with a cherry sauce. (Admission: I've only eaten this, never actually cooked it.)
pertinax, Nov 25 2009

       Howabout turducken? Turkey stuffed with Chicken stuffed with duck stuffed with stuffing.
RayfordSteele, Nov 25 2009

       First rub the duck with olive oil and spices.
Barbeque the duck upright on a beer can full of mulled wine in a pan to catch the drippings.
Sear on high heat until the skin browns a tad and then turn off one side of the barbeque and turn the other side to medium, and roast it on the side of the barbeque you have turned off, rotating and basting occasionally.

       mmmmmm, crispy juicy mulled wine goodness.
If you do it right all of the wine will infuse the bird.


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