Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Half café

Table for one?
  (+8, -1)
(+8, -1)
  [vote for,
against]

Open the door of half café and step inside. It is breezy and cool because the entire side wall of the building is missing, allowing you a pleasant view of the gardens.

All of the tables and chairs are uncomfortably narrow, because they are all sawn in half. They perch precariously on their two side legs, cunningly cantilevered onto floor plates that tone with the linoleum floor covering.

There is a sudden click as the time passes half-past and the minute hand of the half-clock retracts into the centre. You'll have to wait half an hour before it pops out again to continue showing the time. You notice the impressive display of potted plants, each in half a pot with a glass side so you can see the roots, and each mercilessly trimmed on one side.

The staff all wear the distinctive uniform of the place - one side white shirt and trousers and apron, the other half skin-tight black body-stocking.

You look at the menu but only the right half shows, lines of dots and prices. The food items are all on the missing left half. Never mind.

Your order of fried egg with toast and chips is brought to your half-table. Presented on a neatly sliced-in-half plate, the half fried egg oozes yolk into your half slice of toast. The half-chips sit in a little pile.

You reach into the little basket of cutlery and now your dilemma really starts. All the knives and forks are in two pieces. Do you use handles without ends, or ends without handles? This could get messy. At least you don't need to use the loos.

pocmloc, Sep 10 2020

Let That Be Your Last Battlefield https://memory-alph...ttlefield_(episode)
Taking sides, literally. [8th of 7, Sep 10 2020]

Crockery supplier https://www.healthy...m/products/half-mug
[pocmloc, Sep 10 2020]

Glass half full https://what-if.xkcd.com/6/
As always, xkcd has already been there... [neutrinos_shadow, Sep 10 2020]

https://www.swissin...FDF85E/img_2935.jpg [pocmloc, Mar 26 2022]

alternative half baked cutlery Silverwear
[normzone, Mar 27 2022]


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Annotation:







       Definetly worth a half croissant.
xenzag, Sep 10 2020
  

       croissants only served in halves?
po, Sep 10 2020
  

       A dieters dream, your cafe will shirley get them halfway to their goal.
whatrock, Sep 10 2020
  

       This would have the huge benefit that it's intrinsically 50% cheaper than competing establishments. [+]   

       // half empty or half full? //   

       Half full, and - intriguingly - it's the top half ...
8th of 7, Sep 10 2020
  

       Your coffee comes with Half & ....!
blissmiss, Sep 10 2020
  

       // one side white shirt and trousers and apron, the other half skin-tight black body-stocking. //   

       Errr... front side/rear side, or left/right ? If the latter, trouble beckons... <link>
8th of 7, Sep 10 2020
  

       [kdf], you make a valid point. Let's call them and tell them. Dummies. hahahaha
blissmiss, Sep 10 2020
  

       [8th] not everything you see on an episode of Starwars is real. And this is clothing not face-paint.
pocmloc, Sep 10 2020
  


 

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