Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Hate Hearts

Sweets with a kick (right where it hurts).
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I don't know if they sell them elsewhere in the world but in the UK we have packets of small sweets, each engraved with a sugary greeting."I love you","sweetie" and such like.
I strongly suspect that these abominations were directly responsible for the collapse of the British Empire and probably indirectly responsible for the world-wide decline in moral standards.
It's about time there were some more robust messages engraved on these, admittedly delicious, little morsels. So "Get Stuffed", "Moron" etc. should be slipped in discreetly amongst the more saccharin messages, just to give the children a sound reality check.
DrBob, Oct 01 2001

Cybercandy http://www.cybercan...22&dbtc=1&pic=1#395
You'd expect Cybercandy to sell this sort of thing. But they don't. However, have a look at the "Extreme Candy" section anyway... [hippo]

BitterSweets http://www.despair....s/bittersweets.html
I could've sworn I already posted this link. [hippo, Oct 01 2001, last modified Oct 21 2004]

BitterSweets http://www.despair....s/bittersweets.html
I could've sworn I already posted this link. [bookworm, Aug 13 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

[link]






       Mine says "up yours"
po, Oct 01 2001
  

       put potassium in them, show people you really hate em!
dekoi, Oct 01 2001
  

       Doesn't work for me, either. It's saying 'Forbidden' and that it has to be got at through a referrer.
StarChaser, Oct 01 2001
  

       I've seen these...can't remember where (maybe a Spencer's Gift Shop) or what they were called, but they do exist. I bought a bag about four/five years ago and had a blast giving them to people. Some of the greetings were "Loser", "Get a Life", and "Kiss this!".
Susen, Oct 01 2001
  

       And of course the old favourite "Bite Me".   

       Sorry, couldn't resist.
CoolerKing, Oct 01 2001
  

       DrBob, that sounds about as romantic as a tax audit!!!!
Sparki, Oct 01 2001
  

       I once saw a comedian (can't remember who, he wasn't particularly funny apart from this bit) who had a routine about amusing himself by putting a small amount of lemon juice around a baby's gums just to watch it screw it's face up in disgust. As he said " no baby, no mater how tough, is ready for lime pickle".
CoolerKing, Oct 02 2001
  

       I'm not keen on making them taste horrible, UB. I think that would rather reduce their money-making potential. Once tasted, never bought again.

Susen: Hugs! I knew I could rely on you.
swivel6: I may be mistaken but the Simpsons is a cartoon, not real life. So I cast a disdainful look in your direction in response to your accusation of 'baked'.

I am also unable to access waugs' link but I kind of like it because it illustrates my idea beautifully. There you all were expecting to find something nice and instead you got a '404'. Perfect!
DrBob, Oct 02 2001
  

       Just kill the final entry behind /blah blah to access recent entries and make your own - I made one: "half bake"
thumbwax, Oct 02 2001
  

       Sounds like something AfroAssault would like.

Nicely done waugs. I think I can guess which one is yours.
DrBob, Oct 02 2001
  

       sod making them taste bad, bad taste goes away, as i said earlier: put potassium in them, the reaction caused in the recipients mouth should give them cause never to mess with you again
dekoi, Oct 02 2001
  

       //DrBob, I used to love Warheads Extreme Candy//

Great, great stuff.
AfroAssault, Oct 03 2001
  

       Hate Hearts LOL! But in the UK several years ago didn't they release a range of sweets called Jibes? These had insults written on them.
smokeyjohnson, Aug 13 2002
  

       I love this idea!!! I had to make my own when I was trying to break up with my annoying boyfriend!! The idea of making them taste bad is pretty cool, but i suggest making them unpleasent not gross. Flavors like the ones in the jelly belly jelly beans that no one eats! Namely Juicy pear and buttered popcorn. BLAH!!!!
KittySama, Mar 19 2003
  
      
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