Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
This is what happens when one confuses "random" with "profound."

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I-already-know-this-stuff implant

Skip annoying warnings
(+2, -2)
  [vote for,

Inspired by the stationary bike who keeps telling me to "keep holding sensors for heart rate" every time I take a hand off to scratch myself.

These annoying warnings are everywhere: how to open the seatbelt buckle on the plane, how severe penalties are for copying DVDs, etc.

We could have all these warnings to transmit a unique radio-frequency IDs, that are received by an implant in your tooth* which stores the IDs of the warnings you see. After some repetitions the implant responds to the warning-issuing device that you have already seen this particular warning, thank you very much, now please show my current speed again!

*The implant can be anywhere, but the tooth position has these advantages:

1) It can be intuitively controlled by clenching your teeth, which is a natural reaction to the annoying warnings.

2) luxury models can include an FM-receiver

xipetotec, Aug 24 2007

Liebeck v. McDonald's Restaurants http://en.wikipedia...onald's_coffee_case
[nuclear hobo, Aug 24 2007]


       ...but I already know to ignore this stuff - it kinda comes naturally. perhaps I have an instruction booklet for myelf?
po, Aug 24 2007

       Certainly, you can ignore it, but this stuff often covers or obscures the important information -- like how many miles I have traveled on the stationary bike -- and that is why I want these things suppressed.
xipetotec, Aug 24 2007

       A far more satisfying solution would be to kill the lawyers responsible for 98% of these "helpful messages", the vast majority of which are designed to limit corporate liability after lawyers successfully sued on behalf of clients whose most predominant feature is the ability to operate a human body from a single neuron.
nuclear hobo, Aug 24 2007

       This reminds me of a speech an engineering teacher of mine once gave:   

       "It used to be that engineers would simply solve the problem presented to them. If our job was to design a hair dryer, we designed a hair dryer. There were no warnings on it. It was understood that the hair dryer is to be used to dry your hair after leaving the shower. It just makes sense. Now we not only have to solve the problem presented to us, but also predict what some idiot might do with the product. Then there must be a warning. Look at a hair dryer. Right there on the cord it says 'do no use in shower'. Of course It wasn't designed for use in the shower because that is stupid, but now we engineers must consider the moronic applications the general population may attempt."   

       Or something along those lines. I doubt the engineers have to think the stuff up, but the speech was funny nonetheless.
bleh, Aug 24 2007


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