Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Inflatable famous singer survival system

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Regular lifejackets are fairly prosaic and uninspiring items.

To differentiate yourself from the average, why not invest one of the new BorgCo "famous singer" inflatable units ?

The life-size human figure makes it appear that the wearer is locked in a passionate embrace with a celebrity musical artiste.

Currently only one design has reached production, due to licensing problems; however, following the signing of a contract with Ms Knowles, the way is open for us to start selling our copyrighted "Beyoncé Aid" ...

8th of 7, Dec 04 2016


       So, sort of a Mae West, basically?
MaxwellBuchanan, Dec 04 2016

       I think I would rather drown...
Voice, Dec 04 2016

       "A giant killer octopus tentacle range" would also be a welcome addition, and promote speedy rescue as the unfortunate victim wrestles with the clinging embrace of the dastardly sub aquatic beast. A winning combination. Have this inflating rubber croissant that never gets soggy
xenzag, Dec 04 2016

       We initially misread that as "A giant killer octopus testicle rage" which seemed odd, but not entirely out of context ...
8th of 7, Dec 04 2016

       So it would be all over when the fat (inflatable) lady starts to go <noise of air leaking away>?
not_morrison_rm, Dec 04 2016

       I think I'd worry that the Miley Cyrus option might float me up-side-down...
RayfordSteele, Dec 05 2016

       "Yey.wee gonflable"
skinflaps, Dec 12 2016


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