Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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There goes my teleportation concept.

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Lava Fried Chicken

Need a way to upstage your neighbor who's always serving re-entry fried chicken?
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Sure, launching food into space for cooking through the atmosphere is impressive, and yields that flavor that only cooking under a rapidly increasing pressure and temperature can deliver, but everyone is doing it these days.

Instead, have our contractors drill your very own "Hellfire Barbeque" in the backyard. Yes, a carbon-fiber reinforced tunnel directly down to the bubbling mantle of the planet. A custom titanium Williams-Sonoma Gourmet Winching system lowers the food to be cooked directly in the volcanic fury of Mother Earth's core.

The smoky flavor of Lava Fried Chicken can't be beat, and many of our clients also enjoy the excitement that occasional geysers, eruptions, and fugitive demons bring to their backyard parties!

tspyz, Apr 25 2002

How To Cook With Lava http://www.dolphinbayhilo.com/cook.html
Cooking time: 45 minutes. [darksasami, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

[link]






       Cooking time: Approx. 30 sec.
phoenix, Apr 25 2002
  

       //a carbon-fiber reinforced tunnel directly down to the bubbling mantle of the planet// is in itself a half-baked idea, regardless of the purpose   

       (and once again, I really think this is lava baked chicken...but I'm no earth's core cooking expert...)
globaltourniquet, Apr 25 2002
  

       G.Tourniquet is correct that this is Lava Baked Chicken, but the addition of the Emeril "Fry In Hell" Lagasse signature model Oil Crucible allows immersing the chicken in fat while being lava-cooked, thus frying to a delicious crispiness.
tspyz, Apr 25 2002
  

       would this method of quick cooking not cause problems of internal bacterial growth due to insufficient cooking 'through' of the said poultry. Salmonella is a possibility and anyways I don't eat slaughtered beasts. I would however advise a pre cooking, maybe steaming with a light marinade of wild herbs, lemon wedges, and cloves of garlic.   

       Alternately, would some kind of swiss fondue with crudites be within the realms of earth's core cookery. I think this will really capture people's imagination and give 'cor cookery' the respectability it needs to really take off.   

       I heard that Delia Smith is presenting a season of shows instructing viewers on how to harness the weather to prepare and cook seasonal produce?
elton_ritchie, Nov 30 2003
  

       Baked. See [link]. Except the hole is natural.   

       Still freakin' cool though.
darksasami, Nov 30 2003
  

       DUDE,   

       I just discovered "Sazon" seasoning for my fried chicken. I was thinking about sqeuzing some fresh lime juice on the the drum sticks after they are in the oven for about 40 min at 375, then tomates. Just imagion the salsa effect achieved with "el bro" black beans and white rice, cooking this, off of, lava would definitly be an upgrade. + for cooking poultry in an exotic manner atleast. just imagion the crispyness...
afterthought, Aug 08 2004
  

       Oh My God,   

       Now were rebaisting the chicken grease over the the lime and chrispy tomato pulp. Singning off now, this is truly amazing, no how/ can y... oh the humanity.
afterthought, Aug 08 2004
  
      
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