Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Mattress with Porno Slot

Mattress with slot for hiding pornography
  (+7, -13)(+7, -13)
(+7, -13)
  [vote for,

Why settle for hiding porn UNDER the mattress when concealment has a much higher chance of success when it is hid IN the mattress?

Available in various capacities, and for other mediums such as videos.

mrkillboy, Jul 15 2000

Shelf with porno slot http://blog.coolz0r.../17/hide-your-porn/
[ping, Mar 19 2006]


       but wouldn't the person that the porno was being hidden from be the same person buying the mattress?
alfrede01, Jul 17 2000

frances, Sep 01 2000

       Caps lock, please.   

       People who could afford the mattress wouldn't need to hide their porn, most likely; if they did, how would they explain buying a new mattress to the SO?   

       Besides, if you hide something in the 'traditional' place, everyone will easily find it. I hid mine as a kid on a piece of plywood on top of the bottom boards of the box spring. Not under the mattress, and not under the bed, in a place nobody looked.
StarChaser, Sep 02 2000

       Hmmmm how about a nice wipe clean vinyl finish. They had them at my university.
therolls, Nov 06 2000

       My cousin used to hide marijuana AND porn in the ceiling panels in his bathroom where no one would look.
AfroAssault, Nov 23 2000

       People used to try this at the convienece store I worked at. We caught them by the footprints on the seat. I once pulled about 10 bags of white powder out and called the police. When someone came up to complain...   

       People are stupid.
StarChaser, Nov 24 2000

       Cheap hotels would probably buy these.   

       I have found that the price of a hotel room is inversely proportional to the probability that one might find porno mags under the mattress.
djmills, Dec 05 2000

       I like the slot idea - one could hide the printouts from the mind-reading inkjet (see under Computers)
stickyman, Mar 02 2001

       With a title like "Mattress With Porno Slot," I expected that the slot in the mattress was there for you to . . . to . . . er, never mind. . . .
deacon, May 12 2001

       'Ere now! Wot's all this then? Filth, that's wot! Oi saw what you're thinkin', deacon me lad, and Oi must say... well, um, Oi thought the same thing, actually.
Dog Ed, May 13 2001

       Slot or no slot, it's gonna be difficult to fit any of computer/vcr/dvd player/monitor/tv into a mattress...
absterge, May 14 2001

       deacon, Dog Ed, er ... ditto.
Rodomontade, May 14 2001

       You'd be surprised how many people like to hide stuff under the mattress. Money, handguns and general household debris can often be found under a mattress.   

       I ordered a bed for the spare room and it came with an underbed storage compartment. Not drawers mind you, but hidden storage under the mattress. The delivery guy said most people preferred it that way!   

       One product that might sell is some kind of retro-fit pockets. The easiest idea to implement that I can think of would be a mattress liner with a stiched in pocket under the mattress accessible from the side. This could have a locking/lockable zip to deter casual thievery or rummaging from whomever makes the bed.
FloridaManatee, Feb 14 2003

       The slot would be used for other than stashing things, unless the client has an inflatable doll.
awilensky, Jun 28 2008


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