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Medicinal Tigers

To finish off what the medicinal maggots don't
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MikeD Enterprises is pleased to announce its first foray into medical science: Medicinal Tigers! The perfect complement to medicinal maggots.

Anyone who has ever owned a tiger knows just how finicky these beast's appetites can be; turning their whiskered nose up to anything even slightly rancid.

Medicinal maggots, however only eat necrotic tissue, shunning the living flesh; making them so suitable for wound debridement.

MikeD Enterprises, and the consumer we are sure, will see these inverse corollary traits to be a match made in heaven.

Posit one of our hypo-allergenic, sterilized medicinal tigers next to the patient, and wait for kitty to eat him/her, signifying that it is time to remove the maggots from the wound.

MikeD, Mar 03 2011


       //I swear by Apollo the healer, by Aesculapius, by Health and all the powers of healing, and call to witness all the gods and goddesses that I may keep this Oath and Promise to the best of my ability and judgement. I will pay the same respect to my master in the Science as to my parents and share my life with him and pay all my debts to him. I will regard his sons as my brothers and teach them the Science, if they desire to learn it, without fee or contract. I will hand on precepts, lectures and all other learning to my sons, to those of my master and to those pupils duly apprenticed and sworn, and to none other. I will use my power to help the sick to the best of my ability and judgement; I will abstain from harming or wronging any man by it. I will not give a fatal draught to anyone if I am asked, nor will I suggest any such thing. Neither will I give a woman means to procure an abortion. I will be chaste and religious in my life and in my practice. I will not cut, even for the stone, but I will leave such procedures to the practitioners of that craft. Whenever I go into a house, I will go to help the sick and never with the intention of doing harm or injury. I will not abuse my position to indulge in sexual contacts with the bodies of women or of men, whether they be freemen or slaves. Whatever I see or hear, professionally or privately, which ought not to be divulged, I will keep secret and tell no one. If, therefore, I observe this Oath and do not violate it, may I prosper both in my life and in my profession, earning good repute among all men for my time. If I transgress and forswear this oath, may my lot be otherwise.//   

       nowhere does it mention tigers!
po, Mar 03 2011

       Presumably, since tigers are feline, the process of pre -consumption sniffing constitutes a CAT scan ...
8th of 7, Mar 03 2011

       //nowhere does it mention tigers!//   

       Well of course you wont find tigers in the expurgated version.   

       //pre -consumption sniffing constitutes a CAT scan//   

       That is how it will be billed, yes.
MikeD, Mar 03 2011

       Thought this would be an idea to harness Charlie Sheen's blood.
daseva, Mar 03 2011

       //nowhere does it mention tigers!//   

       Maybe you've got the expurgated version. I'm pretty sure the second stanza has a pretty long bit about tigers.
doctorremulac3, Mar 03 2011

       //you've got the expurgated version. I'm pretty sure the second stanza has a pretty long bit about tigers.//   

       And a bit about the gannet.
MikeD, Mar 04 2011

       You will need lots of Tiger Balm, too.
neelandan, Mar 05 2011

po, Mar 05 2011

       a version of the original greek one apparently.
po, Mar 05 2011

       //rebranded, the cat scan.//   

       Or the kitty scan. Of course this would cause gynocologists to think of an alternate name for thier examinations...
MikeD, Mar 05 2011


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