h a l f b a k e r yA dish best served not.
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Imagine the scene, you are an intrepid explorer travelling through a dense jungle. You are hacking away at the undergrowth, flailing around like a lunatic, all the while wasting your valuable energy. You should probably invest in a Motorised Machete. The handle of the machete is at 90 degrees to the
blade, and the blade is held into the handle by a bearing, which is connected to a motor. You press a button, and the blade starts whirring around in a circle in front of you, meaning all you have to do is hold it out in front of you and walk.
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You call that a knife? This is a knife! *Swish* |
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for some reason or another, I read this as Motorbike Machete. I'm slightly disappointed, but I don't know why. |
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Sounds like an excellent way to slice limbs and things off one's fellows - I'll take four for my next battle chariot. |
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Presumably this has a 'manual' mode for when the battery runs out... Hopefully it also has some sort of kill switch for when you drop it and desperately try to avoid the whirling, flashing blade...? |
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This is suspiciously reminiscent of the auto-truncheon thing the police had on The Simpsons. |
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When I used my 'weed whacker' at the weekend I was continually showered with debris... but at least that was only garden debris.
I wouldn't be keen to stand near anyone using a motorised machete in the jungle. Too many stinging bugs and poisonous thorns coming at you high speed for my liking. I guess you'd need to add some sort of protective suit to the tanks of fuel you're already lugging into the jungle!
As an aside - you'd still need to carry your machete with you anyway, as it's pretty much the ultimate tool for survival (making shelter, making fire and cooking). |
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I was trying to find a link to one of those tractor-mounted brush-clearing whirling-blade thingies, but I couldn't find one. |
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I think this is more of a weapon for a futristic gladitator moving. Dun Dun Dun Dun Dudadada Dundadada... |
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"I think we should go that w...ArGH!!!!" |
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"I think we should go that wargh"? |
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Whats a wargh? Which direction is it in? |
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