Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Nudist Cosy

Warms the nudists' nethers.
  (+5, -3)
(+5, -3)
  [vote for,

Nudists are a wonderful section of society. Think of all the joy they bring to "birdwatchers", young boys(and some old ones) and the entire British nation. All that fantastic footage of nude tennis and volleyball, vast areas of variously hairy and cellulite dimpled pasty flesh rippling in the breeze.

But what do the poor naturists do in cold weather??

Perhaps they cannot afford to fly South for the Winter.

And if they put clothes on, how are they going to challenge all the duffelclads with their non-conformity?

I suggest the Nudist Cosy.

An exact replica of the particular nudists body but made 1 or 2 sizes too large. The outside is very realistically executed having pubic hair, moles , cellulite etc. The inside is a warm, thermal, snuggly lining.

It allows the nudist to keep warm and to make their statement against all the clothed sheep of the world.

So fling off your clothes in wild abandon............and then put them on again (but no one will ever know the difference).

squeak, Feb 11 2003

(??) Alanis Morissette has the approximate idea http://mensnewsdail...anis-morissette.htm
Now just add some insulation, and she'll be set for some rebellious cold-weather publicity stunts. [gastronaut, Oct 04 2004]


       I like it.
snarfyguy, Feb 11 2003

       What a wonderful idea, even though it would look creepy in the wardrobe.
oneoffdave, Feb 12 2003

       What's this made out of? I hope we're not veering into "Silence of the Lambs" territory.
my face your, Feb 12 2003

       I suppose it could be made out of some kind of latex material or that microfibre stuff thats really soft. A body enhancing suit would defeat the purpose as none of the normal people would be shocked by it. The amount of air brushed or model-perfect bodies we see every day in the media has desensitised us to them. What I wanted was a replica suit of a "normal" nudists body. This is one of the points of the nudist movement. Every body should be able to get their bits out in public and not just those who are licensed to do it by the fact that they are perfectly tanned, smooth skinned and slim.
squeak, Feb 13 2003

       What a very strange idea. Croissant.
DrBob, Feb 13 2003

       but isn't the part of the alure of nudism the free and unencumberd feeling of actualy being nude? Of course that's only nice in warm weather, or in winter, in well heated indoor spaces. But to have this flesh-toned, anatomicaly correct full body, inulated suit custom made, might be just the sort of encumberance that nudist have been shunning all this time.   

       But hey, with your suit, on valintine's day (when it's still real cold out) you could stick wings on the back, and go around all day as a cherub. (lol)
-wess, Feb 13 2003

       Of course thats PART of it [wess] but its too damn cold at the moment.   

       minus 15 celsius is too frosty for anyone to be in the nudd (unless you're Swedish).
squeak, Feb 13 2003

       (on a quick recess from the sauna)
FarmerJohn, Feb 13 2003

       No, we put them into our oh-so-gauche Louis Vuitton gloves. You know, the ones we had specially lined with Panda fur.
my face your, Feb 13 2003

       Good idea.   

       But I'm usually only naked around my house, where I run around screaming and chasing imaginary animals.
brockbridges2, Feb 14 2003

       How long does it take for the imaginary goat to give it up for you?
thumbwax, Feb 14 2003

       I don't think I'll dare to ask nick much more about his personal life...   

       hmmm... nudists and sheep...
RayfordSteele, Feb 18 2003

       //The amount of air brushed or model-perfect bodies we see every day in the media has desensitised us to them. //   

       Speak for yourself.
egbert, Jun 04 2003


       Figures how, exactly? Are you accusing me of being Eurotrash? Or is that the program wiz ze guy oo speaks lak zis?   

       Incidentally, Happy St. George's Day, everyone!
squeak, Apr 23 2004

       Why not all-weather suits, light-weight and thermal, so you never have sit down where another might have deposited even trace body fluids, the most unattractive aspect of nudist life.
babyboomer, Apr 25 2004

       The best thing about this is that, every spring, you'd be able to dramatically lose weight without going on a diet.
moomintroll, Oct 06 2006

       The best thing about this is that you can shake your naked ass without simultaneously freezing it off.
squeak, Oct 09 2006

       On really cold days, I think I might wear this over a lounge suit. I like the idea of flamboyantly throwing it off to reveal a sober collar and tie.
pertinax, Oct 10 2006

       Kinda like James Bond except you're not a crocodile.
squeak, Oct 10 2006

       This made the front page of youtube on october 10 I think people should be able to go authentically nude whenever they like
beanangel, Oct 11 2009


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